To ask if you live rurally....do you enjoy it?

[PottererCrouch]

As title really, I live rurally and really enjoy it, but I was at a party on Saturday night and got talking to a friend of the host, they asked where I live and when I said where it was, pretty much gasped and said 'good lord, however do you cope living there? It's the middle of nowhere, no, I couldn't be doing with that. I always wonder why people want to live rurally, just doesn't appeal at all to me. Do you actually enjoy it?!'

They were very drunk but I couldn't help but feel a bit offended for a start, it IS a small village (300 houses) but it does have a pub and primary school and we're only 6 miles to the nearest town so not completely 'isolated.'

I see a lot of people on here warning others off living rurally as it isn't good for kids and they regret it etc.

If you live rurally, do you enjoy it and why?

I live out in the country. I love the quietness and no near neighbours.

But we bought an old farmhouse (130+years) and I hate it. I've always hated it. Don't ask, it's a long story.

So, yes I love rural living. But if I had to do it again I wouldn't buy in the country unless I could afford to buy a house that was less than 30 years old, or had been extensively modernized.

I think you have to be a certain type to enjoy it. You do or you don’t. I grew up in a village no way would i inflict that on my teens! But if your teens love walking and horse riding it would be ok - mine do not!

My DM lives rurally albeit in another country. I do not.
I have two takes in this.
When we stay with her I absolutely adore the isolation and the peace and as someone said previously the wonderful night skies.
But I do see it as everything is just a little bit harder. She has no mains gas and cannot just pop out for something she need for a recipe.
DM has a thrived for years and I do believe it's kept her going well into old age. But she's coming to the point in her life (late 70s) when she wants and needs to be less reliant on her car.
I really worry for her how she will cope with being closer to town. She's very stoic and has admitted it's the right practical move but at the same time admits she will struggle.
I fully expect a speeded up demise as she won't have to traipse 200m with a wheelbarrow to fetch her logs for the fire nor will she have the solitude she chooses now.
Luckily currently she has other like minded people within a 1km radius who all look out for each other but I'm convinced (as she is) that it will be the begging of the end when she moves.
She'll hate it and goodness only knows what her dogs will make of it!!
Still not sure I can forgo th 24 hour supermarket 5 mins down the road but completely and jealously understand why you would.
Horses for courses I suppose

I hated it as a teenager but it was great when I was wee. Nowadays I live on the edge of a small town but we plan to move somewhere with few neighbours when dd is up and away.

Yes I love it. Love clean air, not being at the mercy of my neighbours and having lots of space.

Everyone’s entitled to their opinion, I have the exact same feeling about cities. A lot of the people I’ve met through work live in cities and I say “wow that’s nice” but really I’m thinking that’s my idea of hell. Each to her own.

We love it. Have done the whole living in London for years as well which we also liked at the time. But for now, rural is the right thing for us.
I know we have been fortunate to not really be affected by covid day to day restrictions, compared to if we still lived in the city.

I have done and loved it. Small rural town now but not the proper countryside I dream of. What I love most is the way animals, the countryside and seasons etc dictate the lifestyle. I’m old fashioned!

Your village sounds great OP

Forgot to add a plus is that DM lives on a camino so drunken dinners or sundowners and cocktails aren't an issue but try )as we did recently) to summon an ambulance as not great. A neighbour had to drive to meet the ambulance cos they couldn't find us.
Always a drama but always a new experience when in the campo 😂

Yes, I live rurally and I love it. I also don't think it is bad for children though you do have yo be prepared to do a lot more driving to activities etc than in an urban area. My adult DD went through a fairly short phase of saying she hated it when she was in her teens, but then went on to live somewhere else even more out of the way as an adult, by her own choice, so I guess it's not that bad then! And my 2 teenage boys are perfectly happy.
I don't mind when people say they would hate to live where I do though, as one of the absolutely best things about it is tge lack of people. If everyone wanted to live rurally, it wouldn't be rural any more! I'm very happy where I am, and if other people are content in towns and cities then I am pleased about that too.

People have different ideas of rural - 300 houses with a school and a pub is pretty urban compared to where I live! Our village has a post box and 30 houses, no kids of similar age. Driving the kids everywhere for everything is pretty tedious, but at least the teens talk to me in the car.

And about the darkness, yes, absolutely can be too bloody dark. Someone switched off the bathroom light last night which makes it impossible to navigate the landing when it's cloudy. Not a chink of light to be seen anywhere.

I live in a small, rural market town - population about 10,000. I wouldn't like to live anywhere smaller or more remote. Dh and I go walking quite a lot through beautiful, tiny hamlets and always say 'lovely place, wouldn't want to live here'. For me it would be the practicalities, rural broadband, phone signal, oil central heating, septic tank, ungritted winter roads etc that I'd struggle with. I also like being in walking distance of shops and pubs. I wouldn't be rude about it at parties though!

@DeliaDinglehopper

I don’t think it was rude and not sure why you’re offended. She’s talking about herself and what wouldn’t work for her presumably. I live in a small town surrounded by countryside. It’s a good compromise for me. I used to live very rurally as a teenager and really hated the isolation and lack of transport links.

You're not sure what's offensive about it? She isn't just talking about herself and what wouldn’t work for her. She said 'Good lord, however do you cope living there?' 'I couldn't be doing with that.' 'Do you actually enjoy it?!'

I really hope you don't think it's OK to talk to people like that.

I do and I love it, I love the peace and quiet, I work in a city so I love getting out of there everyday and back to the quietness. It was fantastic to have the countryside/sea on my doorstep as well during the Lock downs

We used to and I hated it. You had one shop, one takeaway, one pub.. there was no variety and if you needed anything you had to get in the car and drive at least 30 minutes. No-one would come visit as we were so out of the way and there was no useful public transport.

I'm happier where we are now, on the edge of town, close enough to benefit from it but far enough away not to feel claustrophobic and to get access to a lot of lovely green space.

OP does sound a tad insecure about how she is perceived. I think most of us just simply know if we enjoy it (I'm easy either way but don't like small towns) and might be having doubts if we had to ask online for others to verify if it is a good thing.

Someone once asked me how I could stand living in the Lakes due to tourism. I had forgotten it half an hour later.

I hate it. It's miles to the nearest supermarket and the village shop is a total rip off (cheapest loaf of bread is £1.60), there is no public transport and the village is overrun with people who hate progression in any way shape or form.

We are currently putting up with MIL's choice of rural living. 45 min drive from us.

She has early onset dementia, lives alone and is no longer allowed to drive.

Her jabs alone have been an exercise in frustration for any normal being...
Shingles at doctors in nearest town.
Covid 1 and 2 at a central medical centre 15 miles away
Covid 3 at a cobbled together centre 20 miles away , literally in the middle of nowhere.
Flu , being done in the nearest city , in a fire station, 20 miles away and pneumonia extra in a pharmacy in the same city, but a different day.

Fun when you can't drive any more.

I live in a village but only a few miles from a town. I've also lived in cities.

I will never live in a city again. I don't know how people stand it - the noise, pollution, traffic....I need space to breath.

300 houses sounds positively urban to me, OP! My village has 6. I live in the Western Isles, so properly rural and a full day's travel away from things like joined-up shops, or decent medical care.

I could happily live somewhere else, but I have always been able to adapt to wherever I lived- a mix of cities, small towns and very rural areas, in the UK and abroad. I just get on with things, mostly, and don't waste time thinking about other places that I might like more. My children feel safe, there is virtually no crime, and I can indulge myself with as many chickens as I want (lots'!). This isn't "my" place, the place where I feel I belong, but all of the people I love are here and want to remain here, so that's enough.

As soon as my youngest is off to Uni I'll be moving somewhere rural and isolated. Maybe close enough for them to stay and still visit their old friends where we are now.

If I was drunk I'd probably have said the same as I've only ever lived in cities though.

We moved from a city to a rural village 6 months ago - population of 1000, one poorly stocked village shop and post office, a crap cafe and a pub in the village, nearest town with a supermarket is 20 minutes by car.

We LOVE it. Quiet, people are a bit nosey but very friendly and generous, the walking and scenery are beautiful, no parking dramas, no GP surgery problems, the walk-centre in the next town is always quiet, no dangerous loose dogs owned by idiots, no littering etc etc.

We've found having to drive 20 mins to a decent shop no great hardship, even if we forget something and have to go back. There are so many things that are better for not being in a densely populated area, that it's well worth it.

What's the definition of rural? I always wonder whether I am. There are 300ish houses where I am. No street lights, no village shop, no takeaway etc. Buses are once an hour but we are only 6 miles from the nearest city.

@QueeniesCroft just a shame you don’t have internet though. 😂 fist bumps to another islander

I was offended because of the sneery and incredulous way she said it, it's fine for her to not want it for herself but to be so gobsmacked that I lived there and enjoyed it was just

Personally I love it for all of the reasons stated, the fresh air, walking for miles in the countryside without seeing anyone, the sense of community, space, no neighbour/ parking issues etc but I could see why someone wouldn't like it, doesn't mean they have to be sneery/ rude though.

Sorry, should've been clearer in my OP, there's 300 houses in the parish, about 150 in my village, and another 150 dotted about another village and 2 houses. My village is the one with the pub and primary school though we love it, DH and I went for a walk after work on Friday, walked past the pub on the way back as it was getting dark and saw that the fire was on and some people we knew were in there so 'popped in' ended up leaving fairly tipsy at 10.30 I love that the pub is pretty and cosy and we know so many people in there (though appreciate you get that in towns/ cities too)

I just see a lot of rural bashing on MN and living rurally with DC is a massive no, no and I guess the comment on Sat night just irked me a bit as I thought, good god, it's not that bad!