Rude/tactless things people have said.

[Belledan1]

I know we all love a CF thread. Chatting to a fellow commuter waiting for the bus to go to work. Not seen each other since beginning lockdown. Dont even know name. I mentioned I liked her hair totally different to before and I said was having mine coloured/cut in 3 weeks, planned it so done for a night out so holding out. She said to me, I wldnt wait that long looks like needs a really good cut, it's very dry. It probably does but you wldnt say that to a person you hardly know. I have very fine menopausal hair and conscious of it anyway.

Going back to work after lockdown and a male colleague actually stopped and pointed at me declaring "God you've put loads of weight on. You're fat now!" I replied I see you're still a cunt though and he squealed on me .
Thing is I had actually lost weight due to walking 5 miles a day while I was off.

*live for summer’
Surely she meant ‘poor kids’ as in poor little things whose parents don’t give a shit not financially poor.

My brother died very unexpectedly and my daughter in law who had just had a baby said to me "Never mind, we've all got Milly, now. I was lost for words

Dancing with a man in my youth and he said to me ooh you've got workman-like hands!!! Perhaps because he was smaller than me?? I thought my hands were nice and slim with long slim fingers

Struggling to get pregnant I got told never mind get a dog instead

Shop lady: 'How many weeks left?'
Me: 'Hmm, till what?'
Shop lady pointing at my stomach: 'How many weeks left?'
Me somewhat frostily: 'I am not pregnant.'

Reminds me of the story told by a well known disabled public figure. Someone, apparently slightly shocked, asked her how she got pregnant?
The reply was a superb put down: "I had sex with my husband".

Losing my son at 26wks 2wks ago and my neighbour told me I was being ridiculous for "moping past" while out with my dogs. I'm sorry but given the circumstances of my loss if I want to mope and look sad then I will but I'm trying not to be

@Smileyaxolotl1

*live for summer’ Surely she meant ‘poor kids’ as in poor little things whose parents don’t give a shit not financially poor.

She didn't, I'm sure of it. It has two different ways of pronouncing 'poor' depending on the meaning if you get what I mean? Tbf even if she had meant that way she'd still have been out of order seeing it was my daughters year group and I know or know of the parents.

I’ve had the granny comment too. I was knacked and I just stared at her till the penny dropped.
A teacher where I work had a reputation for being “direct” ie, she was a rude cow. My daughter (who has the same colouring as me)came into meet me at work and she said “Oh, I always thought you bleached your hair, but seeing Little Fuckery maybe it’s natural.

A friends father’s “compliment”:

“I don’t mind your lot, it’s the P’s (slur for Asian people) I can’t stand”. I was 8.

I used to volunteer at my DS primary school, I would go in for 3 hours every day whilst working towards a qualification to be a qualified classroom assistant. I would be tasked various roles such as reading, listening to them read, going through maths tasks etc. I was basically treated as a member of the FT staff.
It was Christmas and I had volunteered for nearly 18 months by then and the Nursery Nurse, who was a horrible woman, told me that the chocolates and wine given by all of the parents to be shared between the staff was not for me as I wasn't a 'real' worker.
I genuinely didn't want her poxy chocolates but I have never forgotten the way she said it.
I was retraining and had very low confidence anyway, I left not long after as I found a job in the local college.

V.I.P. turned up to do an "unannounced visit" at my workplace.

While I was quite junior in the management structure, I happened to be the most senior person working on that particular day.

Was called to the office by the Senior Manager's PA and asked to accompany Mrs. Bigwig around the site.

As we walked down the corridor together she turned to me and said, " I don't know why they (ie. the office staff) make such a fuss when I drop in to visit. I don't mind being taken round by someone UNIMPORTANT" !!

This was a hospital.
I was a Ward Sister.

Me and my friend have very similar dogs (both spaniels but mine is a cross) same colouring. Last time we were all together she announced that her dog was definitely better looking than mine. I was really quite offended. I felt like she had just told me that her kids were definitely better looking than mine. Her dog really isn't better looking anyway he's get a very pointy head for the bread. It actually makes him look a bit like an alligator, and he has bowed legs with feet that stick out to the side, but I would never say any of that to her. I'm going to one day now though.

I heard a woman at soft play loudly complaining to her friend that we had brought an iPad to soft play which was ridiculous and that it was our fault that her dd was having a tantrum as she wanted to play with it. She soon shut up when she heard DS talking to me via his iPad as he's non verbal.

Fellow NCT member, both just had our second babies. She showed off her new daughter, I was holding my baby son and she said to me 'Thank God she was the right sex'! I never liked her after that. Her daughter and son both live abroad now and have very little to do with her.

My mum found out she had a huge tumour in her spine. ‘Friend’ (turned out to be crazy in other ways) ‘oh! My friend had a brain tumour and now she’s dead’….. great! Just what I wanted to hear!

Well, as I am an oldie, I go around now, thinking that you are bound to meet, or talk to someone, somewhere, who has the tendency, to come out with, crass, rude, and odd ball statements. Maybe personal comments, or other such things. I don't know why people are like this, they maybe bored, maybe just have a critical nature, (lots of those).or just plain uninteresting folks.

It's easy to just shrug some people off, and let them go on their merry little ways somewhere else.

Many years ago pregnant with first ds. Went to get a tire changed on my car. Couldn’t get my wedding ring due to water retention. Bloke in the garage sang “we’re getting married in the morning “ Tosser.

Then after had the baby went to a party with exh. Woman at party asked if I was going back to work to which I replied I was going part time. “Oh you’ll be a part time mum then “

What is it with some people .

I'll never forget the lady who guessed I was in my 'early forties' when I was twenty fucking six. Ive never had anything like this from anyone else ever.

I'm nearly 32 now so I'm guessing if I ever saw her again she'd have me down as 100.

Having a drink in my late teens with someone a few years older than me who I really fancied I said I'd been offered a place at Bristol Uni but wasn't sure about it, wasn't it just for Oxford and Cambridge rejects? Thanks, he said, it never went further!

In her early teens my daughter did grow quite tall very quickly and had very elaborate train-track braces on both top and bottom teeth. She was, like most kids her age, rather awkward and gawky for a while.

A friend remarked 'Of course you'd be the first to admit that [daughter] is no oil painting!'

Same friend presented me with a box of chocolates when my mum died.....*shrugs

A family friend was staying with my parents for a week - I hadn’t seen her for about 10 years. I was on maternity leave at the time with a 6 week old and a 2 year old. Was still carrying a baby weight and was a size 14 (usually a 12) Neither child was sleeping well and I was doing that eating for energy because your sleep deprived thing. The family friend commented loudly in the cafe we were meeting in “I can see you’re not bothered about shifting the weight!”

To her credit my DM nearly lamped her!

About three weeks after my baby's funeral, we had a few friends round with their new baby. MiL puts the baby in my arms and tells me it will spur me on to get trying for another. Really and truly happened!!

When I was diagnosed with MS I had loads of people say "my cousins, daughters, wife's ex had MS and she died/ is bedbond/ in a wheelchair. Not really what I wanted to hear!

@CarrieMoonbeams

As a result of my horrible childhood, I had decided when I was still very young myself that I'd never have DC as I was terrified that I might repeat the pattern of abuse.

I met DH when we were teenagers, and told him that very early on. He was fine with that.

However, when I was 30, we spoke about it at length, and decided that we might just TTC. I got pregnant straight away and we were absolutely thrilled.

I lost my baby at 15 weeks.

My SIL said "well, there's no point in crying about it, it's not like it was an actual baby yet" and my mum said "probably just as well. You'd have been a rubbish mum anyway!" Well yeah, with a role model like her and my dad, I might well have been.

DH and I never tried again. Scans weren't so advanced in those days so I don't know this, but I think it was a boy and in my heart I call him Ben. I still whisper happy birthday Ben on his due date, 11 January. He'd be 27 now.

to all of us who've had to deal with horrible comments. I wish people would just think before they open their gob - they just merrily go on with their day, leaving hurt people behind them.

Just wanted to wish you well @CarrieMoonbeams