Why aren’t you obese?

[Spottyphonecase24]

A bit of a weird one but I have just got off a zoom call with my therapist. We were talking about my weight (I am obese).

Why isn’t everyone else obese? What stops you? I don’t seem to have an off button. I remember going from a 10 to a 12 and thinking that’s it I’m not going to get any bigger but I did and now I am in a size 24 and they are getting a bit tight. I’ve read lots about how people have their light bulb moment to lose weight and that has not happened to me, or maybe it has and I’ve ignored it.

What stops you eating a tub of icecream or picking up a large bar of chocolate instead of a small one or one bag of crisps instead of a family size bag?

I honestly don’t know the reasons why people don’t eat more. Is it will power, feeling full?

I'm like you. But when I get dressed to go out and I look disgusting in the few bits that still fit me I start dieting again. I yoyo. I've just had a baby so I'm 85kg, I've been 55kg at my lowest. I'll get down, then "treat myself" then not stop until I've eaten everything I refused myself while getting down and have put all the weight back on.

I'm slightly overweight. I don't eat too many calories, but I drink (alcohol) too many, which I'm working on.

I don't ever buy, and very rarely eat, crisps, chocolate or any sweet food (save for 40 cal ice lollies).

I generally dont crave that sort of food and, although sometimes tempted in the supermarket, never pick it up.

I'm aware of how and what I eat, but I don't obsess.
I always, always have breakfast and lunch.
Don't eat lots of cards. Most dinners are low carbon.
Don't drink fizzy drinks cos it's basically liquid sugar.
Don't really snack in work. If I do, it's a kit kat size thing, roughly.
Rarely do takeaway. Did mcD tonight. 1st time in 3 months.
Snack fri- sun nights.
Drink too much at weekends.
Do have a sweet tooth, but am aware just how calorific that is.

I run, I do the gym, but don't kid myself that it stops me putting weight on. Slimmest I've been in years was when I moved house and didn't have time to sit and eat (other than for fuel)for 2 months.

I never go over 9st. If I thought I was going to, I'd eat less, simple as that.
I like how I look and feel at this weight and apart from 2 pregnancies, I've weighed the same my entire adult life.
I'm now 50 and while I do have treats every day, I eat lots of fruit & veg and have never had big portions.

I'm classified as obese. I just don't buy stuff that I like. My meals are probably a bit too cheese based sometimes but I never snack, though I probably drink too much alcohol. I'm sat at a desk for 40 plus hours a week though, which is what I contribute to my weight gain. I'm around 17 stones 😳🤦‍♀️ More exercise and less bad food maybe? It's a struggle. I desperately want to lose weight but barely overeat. I feel your pain.

I think because I'm not that bothered about eating.

For me it's a mixture of things. Having a small appetite for as long as I can remember. I hated breakfast before school and was rarely hungry before lunch, took my DM a while to realise that's just the way I was.

I eat what I want and when I want but stop when I'm full. People say its wasteful but if I have had enough but have half left on my plate I wont force it down. I will either save it for later, share with my dog 😁 or put it in the food bin. I dont tend to over buy though, or cook as big of portions for myself.

I dont drive either which helps and too impatient for short trips public transport so will walk.

It's a mixture of luck, genetics and the way you view food I think.

I do keto ,i eat less than 25 g of carbs per day,eat no fruit except strawberries and blueberries,eat as much fish or meat as i want with a big salad or a good helping of cauliflower cabbage courgettes broccoli or aubergine,drink only water or kumbucha.
Try it for three days only you will lose pounds

@Twattergy

From your list:
In the past 18 months when I've not been rigidly limiting my eating I would eat home made thin based or a shop bought stone based pizza about once a week.
I never eat takeaway curries, milkshakes or anything with cream in. I wouldn't have puddings or cakes.
I would have crisps several times a week (1 bag from a multipack), and biscuits or a chocolate bar most days. However some of those days I'd eat chocolate instead of a dinner.
I do drink fizzy drinks daily and always have but have never drunk anything other than sugar free ones. I also almost never drink alcohol.

However I am obese and gained nearly 6 stone in the last 18 months because I wasn't rigidly adhering to a low carb low cal diet which is the only way I can stay at normal BMI.

Many reasons:

1. Don't want to be fat
2. Enjoy healthy food
3. Some of whats been described here (lasagna + garlic bread etc) sounds so stodgy and would make me feel sick
4. Want to give my health the best possible chance
5. Feel better when I eat well

Having said all of the above, I probably still eat too much(/dont move enough) and feel fat. I do feel for you, I'm a much smaller size and only want to shed a few pounds which I am struggling with let alone having as much as many others. Good luck OP.

I have terrible side effects if I eat crap too much. I crave it and do indulge but I’d say 70-80% of my diet is clean and healthy

I love eating. (don't we all). So I do not keep anything "treat like" in the house, unless its for that evening. So no fizzy drinks, fancy cereal, choc cakes, sugary stuff, fatty stuff etc. You will only find the basic pure food groups in our house, so once u have had dinner that's it. (unless u starting cooking up a whole meal). But if I want a cake when Im out or some chocolate on a friday night I will have it.

Genetics is often mentioned and there could be something in that- whether it makes you more or less pre-disposed to gain weight easily. I wonder if genetics also affects your appetite, how you react to stress or attraction to certain foods. For some people, creamy foods or sweet foods don't appeal and others crave them. I don't know the answer, just thinking having read some of the comments which show how different we all are.

I don't have a car, and so I walk everywhere. I think that makes a massive difference to me. I'm also a vegan, and often fill up on veggies, which you can eat an unlimited amount of, and not gain weight.
I am a foodie, and love food and cooking. So, I reckon I could put on weight if I wasn't careful. I'm not skinny (used to be) but a healthy size 12.
I do eat very naughty treats sometimes though, such as crisps. I love them, but only have them occasionally, and consume them mindfully. That's a big thing - eating treats mindfully rather than mindlessly.
I wish you well OP

Op I do all the shopping so No biscuits, cakes, bread, crisps or cheese.. Lots of fruit to fill me up.. Saccorine instead of sugar, low fat margarine and no alcohol.. It has made such a difference (size 18 to size 12) and walk a lot more and swimming 3 times a week.. I have been size 12 for about 5 years and feel so much better.. So used to living this way that I don't feel hungry.. I have 3 meals a day of of normal food.

Trauma that led to an eating disorder.

Not the answer you wanted I guess, sorry.

I'm obese (never been bigger than size 16 mind so perhaps a bit different!). I'm working on it very slowly - I have reduced my sugar in drinks (I have tea so switched to sweetener, switched to diet pop). I am trying to do intermittent fasting too (no food after 8pm or before midday!). I think with things like ice cream don't be tempted to eat straight out the tub portion some up and that's your pudding no seconds. If you know you'd eat a family size bag or large chocolate bar to yourself in one sitting then don't buy it! Good luck :)
I initially tried slimming world and it was a good start I think to limit treats

I'm very overweight, I'm also tall so the tipping point from carrying it well to just a fat person took a while.

I've just started seeing a nutritionist, no calorie counting, just portion sizes.

I've never been skinny, in fact I wasted my 20/30s thinking I was fat.

Now I have 20kg to lose to get back to my normal.

I can't eat when I'm stressed, I've been in a bad relationship for the last couple of years and he cooked all our meals, portion sizes were too big so the weight has crept on despite often only eating once a day.

Don't do fad diets, they aren't sustainable.

I lost 4kg last week (week 1) just by eating 3 small meals a day and one snack (the snack can even be a small glass of wine because it's a lifestyle change and let's face it a glass of wine is nice sometimes)

I've buggered my metabolism with disordered eating, so part of it is ensuring I eat enough, so a piece of chicken for dinner should be around 100g which after you add a couple of veg portions is actually a lot and I'm full.

I'm very unhappy with my body, I'm in my 40s now so feel this is my chance to sort myself out one love and for all and so it's a lot willpower, I've pullled out all my pre kids dresses and hung them up as a goal.

Change one thing at a time if it's too hard, stop buying treats if you can't control yourself, I do have a fridge full of chocolate and snacks for the kids but don't tough it because it's not mine.

Frequent Antibiotic use is known to be linked to an increased risk of obesity.

@NannyGythaOgg

Is that just in childhood or does it also apply in adulthood ?

I think I'm lucky in that I find it harder to put on weight than other people. I've never really had to worry about dieting and having to exercise regularly in order to stay slim.

However, I don't know how long that will last so I try to make sure I don't have lots of snacks in the house. My willpower is non-existant when I know there's some chocolate in the cupboard, but I find it quite easy to avoid buying it when doing the weekly shop. The treats I buy during my shop are all things that I know I wouldn't eat in one sitting (as I don't like them enough), or that I don't feel are toooo unhealthy. Such as a tub of fruity yoghurt, some ready salted crisps, cereal bars. Buying my favourite chocolate biscuits or ice cream would be dangerous for me!

Also, my family are all pretty slim, as is my partner, and so I feel like there's an expectation I'll remain slim. I think it would be a lot easier to not care much about putting on weight if the people around me were all on the larger side.

Willpower - also even though I enjoy a cookie or tub of ice cream it's not nice enough eat all the time and makes me feel a bit sick of myself when doing it regularly to be honest. Almost sluggish

I'll have it in moderation

I think it’s partly genes but I’m not someone who just eat anything and rely on genes alone. Partly it’s just not having much junk food in the house although that’s hard with kids who like a few treats. It’s also getting into the habit of not necessarily exercising more but just moving more. So for instance, when I’m waiting for one of my kids to do a class/hobby I go for a 30 min walk. I also try and compensate by eating a small/healthy lunch if I’m planning on say a takeaway for dinner x

Hate the feeling of feeling stuffed and I know how quickly I put weight on. I'd love to eat crisps and chocolate and do crave them but I want to show good habits to my kids aswell

@secretbookcase my husband was diagnosed as a diabetic with quite severe blood sugar. We looked into ways of reducing blood sugar naturally (plus medication) and fell upon this way of eating. Two years on we have lost 8 stone between us and feel a lot better.

I think the closest way of eating is a low carb diet. I'm not ultra low carb as that would be 20 carbs a day. I'm 40 as it's easier and doesn't make a lot of difference to me.

I joined a reversing diabetes Facebook group and my knowledge grew from them.

Why aren't I obese? Three main reasons OP.

1. Genetics - I'm 5ft7, naturally slim-ish build, long legs and small boobs (the small boobs actually make a massive difference!)
2. Energy levels - I do everything at speed, I rarely sit down.
3. Sheer and unadulterated luck.

I don't restrict anything I eat - I grew up with a DM who was permanently on a diet and as a result I will deny myself nothing. I buy crap - sweets, chocolate, crisps, wine - I love it all and eat some kind of crap most days. Alongside three full meals. Plenty of veg, and plenty of good stuff, but plenty of carbs and crap too. Granted, I wouldn't eat a packet of biscuits in one sitting, but I'd certainly have two or three without even thinking about it and certainly wouldn't feel guilty about it. Likewise I'd never scoff an entire family bag of crisps - I'd feel sick - but treating myself to a couple of small packets with a glass of wine whilst watching TV? Hell yeah!

I've never gone above a size 12, not once (aside from when I've been pregnant) in nearly 50 years. Yes my stomach is not quite as flat as it used to be, and my legs are not quite as smooth and skinny as they used to be, but by and large my general body shape is not that different to what it was when I was 18.

So much of it is genetics and luck.