Why aren’t you obese?

[Spottyphonecase24]

A bit of a weird one but I have just got off a zoom call with my therapist. We were talking about my weight (I am obese).

Why isn’t everyone else obese? What stops you? I don’t seem to have an off button. I remember going from a 10 to a 12 and thinking that’s it I’m not going to get any bigger but I did and now I am in a size 24 and they are getting a bit tight. I’ve read lots about how people have their light bulb moment to lose weight and that has not happened to me, or maybe it has and I’ve ignored it.

What stops you eating a tub of icecream or picking up a large bar of chocolate instead of a small one or one bag of crisps instead of a family size bag?

I honestly don’t know the reasons why people don’t eat more. Is it will power, feeling full?

in my 20s: could eat what I wanted and stayed a size 10

mid-30s (ass soon as I got married): started piling on the pounds and could physically eat much more than I could in my 20s and would eat all junk in the house

Despaired for years as had no idea how to eat in moderation.

Finally tried low carbing (staying under 20-50 grams per day) and it wiorks for me.

I think it's the combination of the ban on bread/sugar/pasta/fruit together with the ability to eat full fat yoghurt/cheese/meat/veg that works for me.

I also find that I want to eat a lot of veg when low carbing, which together with the 2-3 litres of water per day, improved my complexion and the notieable results showed me that I can do it. I had zero self-belief before low-carbing.

I am overweight. I’m currently on a healthy lifestyle kick to support my cousin who who is much more overweight and has developed type 2 diabetes as a result. We check in with each other through the day and support each other in making healthy choices. So far, I’ve lost a stone.

What helps me isn’t calorie counting - in fact that really didn’t help at all. Restricting my diet also didn’t help. Generally I have used high fat and high sugar food to treat myself instead of being nice to myself in other ways - by buying nice clothes, taking a break etc. So I now always have the nice healthy food that I like in the house (like melon and smoked salmon that would have felt too expensive before, compared to say a big multipack of crisps), and I consciously frame the healthy choices as being good to myself and my health. It’s really hoping

Helping!

@cozycat1

I eat healthyily most of the time. My body has got used to good healthy food. Processed junk food makes me feel crap,hence I now avoid. I eat maybe 2 sqaures of dark chocolate thats enough. If I ate say a whole biscuit I would get a massive headache from the sugar. White carbs bloat me and give me constipation hence I try to avoid pasta,pizza,baguettes etc.if I eat rich creamy food physically makes me feel sick. I do love good bread and butter a olive oil,still eat fried food eg fish and chips. I do agree with the poster that said we have a set point. I feel out of sorts if go much above mine and generally then cut back or exercise more. And I also normally do loads of exercise. At least something every other day. This really helps with feeling well overall and of course burns energy.

@Lockheart... Quote above

@Noavocado

This thread is quickly turning into a competive under eating thread. A whole biscuit makes a poster feel sick.

It is not. Stop trying to prevent posters from expressing their experience. Why not listen to, accept and believe other people’s experiences? Instead, you undermine them and laugh at them by calling it “competitive undereating” with a laughing emoji. It’s bullying, nasty behaviour.

I was overweight as a teen because I ate too much, I’ve been slim so long people tell me I’m lucky to be naturally slim. As they plough through a 200g bar of fruit and nut.

1. I don’t want to be fat.
2. I don’t to look old prematurely and weight would make me look matronly because I’m short.
3. I like to wear nice clothes and I don’t want to be buying more all the time because I’m too big for them.
4. I want to live. I really, really want to stay alive. People don’t make the connection in their minds when they buy food they know are unhealthy & dying 20 years before they should, last time fil was on a cardiac ward their was a morbidly obese man completely stunned he needed a quadruple bypass, it would’ve taken years to get that big though. The wife was a size 8 by the look of it. My dads the same size and it takes a lot of food to maintain.
5. Laziness. I’d rather be reading, or researching my latest fad or planning decorating than constantly snacking and clearing up the kitchen.
6. if I eat badly my skin goes grey looking. I look terrible.

Low carb removes the cravings for me, and reduces my appetite. But the truth of the matter is my desire not to be fat is stronger than my desire to eat too much.

I don't snack for the vast majority of the time.

I don't drink alcohol.

I don't like fatty foods like butter, cream, milk, chocolate.

Rarely eat past 6pm.

But also-- all of my family are slim. I'm sure there must be something genetic in it.

I don’t buy it, if it’s not in the house most times I can’t be bothered to go and get it from the shop

I'm a size 12 but am probably classed as overweight by about half a stone if you go by bmi. I have a terrible sweet tooth. I eat chocolate, cake anything sweet several times a day. The only reason that I think I'm not more overweight is because I never eat three meals a day. I don't eat anything apart from a few cups of coffee until at least 11/12 o clock and only have lunch a couple of time a week. Always have dinner which is usually fairly balanced and healthy. I love all food. Don't have takeaways very often maybe once a month at most, same with alcohol. Probably only have a couple of glasses of wine a month. So whilst my diet is terrible I'm probably not that far over if at my daily calories every day. I do need to change though as it is getting a bit crazy now

I am obese because food is nicer than any other feeling from a human. I'd rather eat peanut butter and scoff chocolate because it makes me happy. I can't put up with people, basically.

I knew I was fat by 8. My Auntie Y would let us eat anything we wanted as kids. I would scoff until my treats were gone whereas my (healthy weight until mid twenties) Sister would have one chocolate treat and then say she was done and would save the rest for another day. Yes, I used to look at her like she was crazy and didn't understand.

My Mum (later age Mum at 40 and Auntie Y even older) and Auntie both lived through WW2 rationing. And when I look at a photo of my Mum, Aunt, Nan and Grampy during rationing years...they are all obese, morbidly obese in fact. What the fuck were they eating?!

Basically Mama tried to live through my pretty and thin Sister as that was the teenage years she never had. Clothes and letting her get away with murder. Yes, I was aware and yes it showed at every decision and turn. My niece is four months old and my Sister is like she looks like you and Mum! I feel I need to warn her that if niece follows that death, by society's standards (currently), is better than living as the fat kid. Seeing as it is seen as that dramatic. But I really hope she has a healthy relationship with food.

It really isn't as simple as eating enough calories.

I am not British so wasn't brought up on processed food and have never eaten much of it.
I don't like sugar.
I have a weakness for carbs but I control that.
I don't have a car and walk everywhere, usually abt 10 k a day.
I don't drink, not particularly to lose weight but because I don't get all that much pleasure out of it.
DH is diabetic and we cannot afford to have another diabetic in the house.

I'm not bullying anyone. The poor OP must feel awful when they 1 biscuit makes someone feel sick.

I only allow myself 3 meals a day and rarely any snacks. But when I do want the odd snack it's ok as it's not daily.

What stops you eating a tub of icecream or picking up a large bar of chocolate instead of a small one or one bag of crisps instead of a family size bag?

I don't want to. I wouldn't enjoy it. I like small amounts of those things but more than a couple of scoops of ice cream would make me feel genuinely yuck. Same for a "huge" lasagne with garlic bread. I could probably eat excessive amounts of good cheese if a nice cheese board was put in front of me all evening? But that doesn't happen often enough to make be put on weight (and a little bit of social pressure would kick in too I guess).

I maybe do a tiny amount of self moderation if I catch myself going to the fridge multiple times a day just because I am bored, not hungry. But not much. I mostly eat what I want to and it isn't enough to become overweight. I'm a 10, was an 8 until early 40s.

I honestly don't know why I'm not obese as I eat total shite and a lot of sugar but am a size 8. I think I have thin genes and I also like exercise which helps

Really interesting. I've always been a size 12 - not thin but nice enough size and would eat and drink whatever but last few years it's getting out of hand
I eat to celebrate
I eat when I'm sad
I eat when I'm stressed
And I massively over eat when tired

I've gone from drinking once a week to daily

I've always been able to reign it in when clothes were tight etc but right now I cant, I'm only content mentally when I'm physically full to bursting.

Weird and not healthy, weight is racing up and up.

I need an off switch but I think it needs to be an all or nothing approach I can't do a little of what I like now. I am putting plans in pace to make life happier but who knows if I can change?

I was obese quite happily with a major love of cooking. In lockdown I was baking non stop, I perfected my cheese scone recipe! It was a wall to wall carb fest! However I didn't feel so good in myself and discovered I'd hammered my pancreas and was now a type 2 diabetic. Not so much fun. I've gone low carb. I'm losing weight and eating carbs makes me feel awful and I can't cope with the thirst. It's hideous. I feel quite sad about not eating cakes. I feel quite happy however with looking better. I'm down by about 3 dress sizes which is good for me. If I manage to reverse the type 2 I'm going to stay sensible as diabetes is awful.

Mostly genes I think. Sorry. I do eat a fair amount of crap, and don't generally have the willpower to stop at 2 biscuits/1 square of chocolate/half a bag of crisps. I'm 38 and 65kg, so heavier than I was when I was 18 but still a size 10-12. I go to the gym twice a week but not much exercise apart from that. I'm afraid I do think it's genetic.

I don’t like fast food/junk food

I don’t like eating for the sake of it

I’m not into cooking so sometimes I will eat porridge or toast instead of a big meal

I like to take my time to eat

I don’t like eating big huge meals piled up

I like to be slim/feel slim

I love clothes and fashion

Probably the same as lots of previous posters but here goes ..
: stop eating when full
: plenty of fruit and veg
: don’t deny cravings, just have less ..a Freddo Bar rather than a Mars Bar!
: Move, move move , take stairs, park away from shop entrance, do HITT in the evening from You Tube
: walk in all weathers ..and in the dark..no excuses
: if you don’t like the gym, don’t join,,why feel guilty..if you do then great!
: join a slimming club if it works for you
: small portions
: did I mention MOVE ! It’s a distraction from food as well as expending calories

Love yourself as you are xxx

I'm slim and my weight is very steady. I don't think something I exercise any conscious control over. It is like it's part of how my body is programmed. I can't identify at all with feelings like not being able to stop myself or lacking willpower with regards to food.

My appetite seems to be very in tune with my energy needs. I've never enjoyed eating until I'm stuffed, my body just decides I'm done at a certain point and I stop eating. I can't generally eat a 3 course meal, for example, and I also routinely don't finish servings in restaurants.

Most of my diet is pretty good too. Takeaways, fried food and sugary stuff are more of a treat. I don't feel the need to limit myself in any way though, it's just normal. Many of the foods I really enjoy are healthy and many unhealthy foods (especially sugary drinks and deep fried foods) make me feel terrible.

This thread is really interesting. I can see the difference with naturally thin people and it just not being an issue for them.

I’d love to be like that!

I can't really relate to wanting to eat more than a packet of crisps or a whole tub of icecream. I like ice cream and I like crisps but I don't want to eat loads - it just wouldn't be enjoyable and would make me feel a bit sick. I haven't ever been on a diet and I have always just eaten what I feel like so I guess the reason I am not obese is because that generally seems to be more or less the right diet to keep me at the right weight.

Wow thank you for the replies I wasn’t expecting o many. I haven’t read them all but will do now.