Are you scared of driving / avoid it ?

[fussytodd]

I've met a lot of women recently who don't like driving and are afraid to, especially not with their kids in the car.

Is that quite common ?

@Vallmo47

Anxious ex driver here. My nerves were so intense it was truly not safe for myself or others for me to carry on, so I stopped. I was such an anxious driver though that the same year I passed I developed a severe psychosis. Some people truly don’t belong on the road and if they hold their hands up to that in order to protect everyone else, fair play to them in my opinion.

Thanks for your honesty and good sense. I love driving and so a LOT of it, most (if not all) of the difficult situations I've experienced have been down to inexperienced or anxious drivers. Even in strange cities you need confidence to be able to safely correct 'wrong lane' type situations, or go with it until its safe to stop for a look at the satnav.

Hesitancy is a HUGE risk to other road users, and that's why new drivers can be heavily marked down on their tests for it.

I live near a motorway junction and the number of people who wait until the roundabout is COMPLETELY clear to pull out, rather than observe the traffic flow is ridiculous, even if they're not joining the motorway. And don't get me started on drivers who head on down the slip road at 40mph expecting to safely join traffic going at 65+.

If you're not confident, or are anxious, you're not safe.

@plantastic

I did find motorway lessons really helpful after I passed. I could ask all the stupid questions, like what happens if you can't merge? Also the instructor was- it's absolutely fine if you want to do 55 in the outside lane. You don't have to overtake everything. I found that helpful and would recommend it.

Oh god, please tell me you mean the inside lane?

Unless all the traffic in the lanes to your left are going at less than 55, there is no way you should be plodding at 55 in the outside lane. Or the middle lane

I love the act of driving; if it were just me and an open road I would absolutely love it. My anxiety comes from how busy and congested the roads are, people who refuse to stick to the rules and break the speed limit, sit right up the back of your car to intimidate you. I remember not long after passing, I made a judgement call not to overtake a stopped bus because a could see a car coming the other way. The taxi driver behind me went absolutely mad, beeping at me and I could see him wildly gesticulating through my rear view mirror. People try to make you make silly decisions through pressurising behaviour - I absolutely hate it and it makes me feel very anxious on the roads.

My biggest thing at the moment is that DH tends to drive And I don’t want to be one of those women whose husbands do the driving.

I’m not keen on night driving, I find the oncoming lights v dazzling. Badly lit roads round here too.

I like motorway driving.

I don’t like driving abroad but will do it. Ended up driving through LA and realised it wasn’t that bad. Most USA driving is quite relaxing.

So um, how many people think it's illegal to take a sip of a drink while driving then ?

I've heard this repeated in real life and had an argument with my friend about it, she would not back down and kept repeating that it's illegal to eat / drink / smoke while driving.

This is absolute BS. It's only illegal if it causes you to drive erratically. And anyone with a brain will understand how to take a sip / bite in a safe way.

www.rac.co.uk/drive/advice/know-how/driving-myths-your-questions-answered/

Hi OP it probably is illegal to have a drink (non-alcoholic) while driving but in practice I have a bottle of water in the car on longer journeys and drink periodically eg if stopped at traffic lights. I will be more distracted by being thirsty!

I’m not keen on night driving, I find the oncoming lights v dazzling. Badly lit roads round here too

same here. Some cars have awful lights.

(as in, too bright)

I don’t enjoy it
If I have a long drive I’m stressed about it before hand
I do it , always
But I don’t enjoy

@berlinbabylon

Hi OP it probably is illegal to have a drink (non-alcoholic) while driving but in practice I have a bottle of water in the car on longer journeys and drink periodically eg if stopped at traffic lights. I will be more distracted by being thirsty!

I’m not keen on night driving, I find the oncoming lights v dazzling. Badly lit roads round here too

same here. Some cars have awful lights.

Its not illegal. The only thing that is potentially illegal about it is if drinking it causes you to be distracted and drive dangerously; like any activity.

If you have never been to the scene of a collision at 30mph (closing speed of 60) then I assume that you are unable to grasp the potential for carnage when you have 2 cars driving at 70 mph.

A head on collision at 30mph is exactly the same as a single car hitting a solid object at 30mph. At least on motorways everyone’s moving in the same direction. I don’t know this for a fact but I’d guess most of the serious motorway collisions result from cars braking hard and those following are either too close or distracted (or both)

A head on collision at 30mph is exactly the same as a single car hitting a solid object at 30mph.

No, it isn’t. A head-on collision with two cars at 30mph would be 60mph - surely.

No, it isn’t. A head-on collision with two cars at 30mph would be 60mph - surely.

No, it’s basic physics.

I'm not scared of driving in general, in fact I quite enjoy it. I'm pretty confident, so don't dither at roundabouts etc.

I don't do motorways though, I don't feel comfortable on them at all - I can't really explain why.

DH doesn't like country road driving and he's been driving for 30+ years

I hate it. Only passed my test aged 33. I don't like cars in general. Never understood why people love them or why everyone was excited to pass their test. I grew up in an area where I didn't need a car and never planned to need one. But then we ended up moving somewhere pretty rural, so I was forced to do it. I am gaining confidence and do a good bit of motorway driving etc now, but it's taken a few years. I'm slightly scared of it, as in I'm cautious, but that's quite reasonable considering the number of idiot drivers around and the number of fatal crashes on the roads.

@berlinbabylon

Hi OP it probably is illegal to have a drink (non-alcoholic) while driving but in practice I have a bottle of water in the car on longer journeys and drink periodically eg if stopped at traffic lights. I will be more distracted by being thirsty!

I’m not keen on night driving, I find the oncoming lights v dazzling. Badly lit roads round here too

same here. Some cars have awful lights.

It is NOT illegal !!!!

I don’t think there would be any harm in less people learning to drive/driving generally given the pressure car use puts on the environment but in many places there just isn’t the public transport infrastructure to make not driving a viable option. I have always taken jobs where I’ve been able to commute by train, and would be put off jobs now where I would have to drive (mainly because the cost of running a second car would swallow up any potential pay rise).

I hate driving. Did my driving test at 17 at the insistence of my parents. Avoided driving for over 10 years by living in cities but had to take it up again when job hunting outside of a city. It's been about 3 or 4 years since I started driving again and I get nervous going anywhere other than my work, one specific car park in town or the supermarket.

Driving causes me so much anxiety, I hate it with a passion. It affects all aspects of my life and I get so annoyed with myself that it's beaten me. People say I am a good driver and I used to drive confidently when younger but now, the fear of it overwhelms me. I have to take my car to the garage this week and I am already worrying about driving it there and back. I have tried CBT, hypnotherapy etc but nothing helps. I think it's time to hang up my keys, for now anyway.

I love driving. I have a Cat 2 HGV licence and have done some commercial driving, including haulage and chauffeur work.

Passed my test at 18, as I had a hobby that required a huge amount of travelling and my mum was sick of ferrying me about!

It's brought me enormous amount of freedom and opportunities (and a bit of cash, when needed!), and I can't imagine what my life would have looked like if I had to rely on public transport or lifts from other people.

The thing is, it's not irrational to be afraid of driving. Cars are dangerous, and that's a fact.

Personally, I've lost two family members to a fatal car accident, and my husband has lost his grandfather and two friends to fatal car accidents. In addition to the fatal accidents, we both know several people who have been injured in non-fatal car accidents, and my husband has had to administer first aid more than once when he's witnessed car accidents and been first on the scene.

If anything, it would be nuts not to be a little nervous about this dangerous mode of transport.

@Flamingmentalcats.......I feel just like you. even the smallest most familiar journey causes me huge overwhelming anxiety. I have no answers but I wish I did.

@Couldhavebeenme3 sorry yes inside lane of course in the UK. I don't live in the UK any more and we use the opposite nomenclature here (which makes more sense! Inside should be the lane nearest the barrier really).