Do you view someone differently if they swear?

[Speckledhem]

I don’t really mind the odd swear word - I swear myself from time to time, but why do people swear inappropriately as in normal sentences or use the C word? Its not that it offends, It’s just really quite repulsive both spoken or written down, I just switch off and lose any respect I would have had for this person.

Is it a regional thing? People just don’t talk like that in my area

I tend to swear only in “hits thumb with hammer” situations. Otherwise, if people swear, I find it aggressive, scary and intimidating.

bad-as
I’m - in
I’ve had a new phone and the predictive text is far too sensitive!

Yes - I 100% think negative of them. Some swear regularly but say they don’t in front of children - they obviously know swearing is the wrong thing to do.
As a non native English speaker - swearing is very poor use of a lovely creative language. Swearing is totally unnecessary.

@cuntness

I don't use it because I don't like it, but you carry on.🤣 I'm not the swearing police and couldn't give a fuck what others do.

@Cryalot2

I rarely swear nor does anyone I mix with. If someone swears in my company I will pull them up and ask them to not use such foul language for which there is no excuse.

You sound fun

I don't judge for justified and conversationally appropriate swearing between adults, and I swear myself sometimes in that context. I don't like any swearing in front of children (outloud, I do swear in my head though ).

I hate swearing where it's habitual and unnecessary - one of the mums at school swears several times per sentence and I doubt she even registers that she does it, ie. "I fucking asked Tommy to bring his fucking PE kit home so I could fucking wash it over the weekend but I bet he fucking forgets"

I only swear in my own home, tend not to outside of it. So, definitely in front of the children, but they are teens and not phased by mum shouting 'oh for fuck's sake' when some washing up slides on the floor or something. I don't swear in most sentences.

I don't enjoy listening to people swearing lots, especially men, it sounds very aggressive and unpleasant, and if someone is swearing in the street/on the bus, I'd give them a wide berth. Teenagers often swear a lot when out, in loud voices, so everyone notices them. Uncool but not worrying.

My friends don't really swear endlessly when speaking, the occasional one for emphasis. I think that's fine. Can't think of a time anyone ever swore at work in 15 years, just not necessary!

As someone who can be quite sweary myself at times, I am increasingly concerned about the amount of swearing I hear just when I am out an about - it is one thing in a group of adult friends when you are making a point - another when you are in public and don't know who is around or there are lots of kids. I never used to, but am beginning to be more put off by it.

I fucking asked Tommy to bring his fucking PE kit home so I could fucking wash it over the weekend but I bet he fucking forgets I was brought up in the 70's on a rough estate, and everyone said 'bloody' instead of 'fucking', so 'I bloody said this, I bloody told her that...'

Yes, it did sound disconcerting then and it does now, because I didn't even know you were allowed to swear when I was little!

I feel like this place is turning into PuritanNet lately. For Puritans by Puritans.

It's just words.

I love how you're implying that you live somewhere people don't swear 🤣

I would view someone who swears a lot as rather coarse but probably there would be other indicators of that.

I would definitely think less of someone who used the c word or t word, particularly women.

@Cryalot2

I rarely swear nor does anyone I mix with. If someone swears in my company I will pull them up and ask them to not use such foul language for which there is no excuse.

I swear - not all the time and adapted to audience.

If someone said I had offended them by swearing I would be taken aback and need to ask why they were talking with me.

Nothing I hate more than being told how I can speak - I’m an adult.

@WimpoleHat

Middle middle class people think swearing is awful and a sign of being lower class. Very highly educated, professional people (in my experience, anyway) all swear (albeit not at people/in front of children) and sneer slightly at the middle class squeamishness about it.

Anecdata do not equal evidence. Nice humble brag in that post, too.

Swearing only bothers me when it's LOUD, obnoxious and in a place where people who don't want to hear it have no choice but to listen (middle of Cardiff city for example), it becomes anti social then.

Other than that I love swearing, excellent stress relief.

This thread has already made me feel better at my own swearing, as I'm definitely not in the "fucking milk in your fucking tea" category, and I don't sit there swearing on the bus.

I do think there are regional differences - where I'm from in the North East the c word gets bandied about a lot just in general conversation, whereas you say it in a country pub where my in laws live and the place falls silent. As others have said, its about reading the room.

I hate swearing - it makes me cringe. My XH swore a lot and I hated that.

I don't hear it very often tbh, no one swears at work, my friends and family don't swear - suits me just fine.

I can go whole days without swearing, but why would I when they are so very satisfying? There is a release in swearing. When you get off the phone after speaking to mansplaining condescending jobsworth you could say "what a mansplaining condescending jobsworth" and feel a little bit less rubbish. Or you could say "what a fucking dick" and feel a shit of a lot better. If can add emphasis too. When somebody asks how you're commute went or how the dentist was, you can say it wasn't just awful or even really awful but it was really fucking awful. Which isn't the worst, but pretty (damn) close. It is a brilliant way of expressing emotion. I've got a massive vocabulary but when I'm having a really rubbish day, or somebody has really upset me, I want the words that clearly and concisely express my feelings without a load of unnecessary waffle. When I hurt myself I just need a quick outlet, a vocal expression of the pain, and I often feel a bit less injured somehow. There is a power on swearing. I write, read and watch a lot of poets and swear words have a particular magic for which there is no good alternative as far as I can tell.

I don't really care if people judge me for swearing. I'm sure they judge me for a whole host of other things anyway. I actually think swearing in front of or even occasionally at your kids is not terrible either. It can be a good opportunity to talk about those words, when they are or aren't appropriate and to share your human feelings that we all lose our shit a little bit from time to time, but also how to manage those feelings and where it is or isn't acceptable to express yourself in different ways.

I may be biased though because growing up I had one parent who was all love, and many swear words, and another who was cold, absent and never swore or showed any other emotion really. I much prefer the big love and bad words variety of person. The kind who don't just love you, don't just really love you but really fucking love you.

I rarely swear nor does anyone I mix with. If someone swears in my company I will pull them up and ask them to not use such foul language for which there is no excuse

You'd honestly attempt to chastise an adult for the words they choose to use? Please do it and let me know how many different ways you're told to fuck off.

I would only judge someone if they swore at someone else aggressively or did it on purpose in front of kids or elderly people or people who clearly don't like it. I don't do it casually in conversation. Only if among really close friends or with DH and usually only if I'm exasperated.

I swear on here sometimes, especially when I'm annoyed about something, like earlier today I said "oh shit, I've booked tickets for that and it might be cancelled, god damn it....all I can think about is the fecking theatre tickets"!

Cunt or fuck, I do avoid as I know people don't like it.

But I think if you find it "repulsive" written down, I'm really sorry, but I'd think you were poorly read and a bit precious.

But I'd never go off on a sweary rant among strangers or vague acquaintances irl, as I do think that can read as aggressive.

I have an Irish accent fwiw, having been raised there. Not sure we necessarily swear more there, but I slightly prefer the sound of swears in Irish accents. Not hugely offended by it in any accent.

I'm a swearer. I have been all my working life. Not sure where it came from as I didn't grow up in a sweary home. I've noticed senior colleagues who were not swearers their entire career become more sweary in their 60s after a period of working with me. My juniors feel free to swear.

I have no excuse or explanation.

I heard it said recently that swearing is a sign of white privilege and it really resonated. I am not aware of ever having been judged for swearing as a white, middle class professional who has been consistently promoted. I suspect if I came from a different background I would have been judged differently.

Swearing isn't my style - nor am I "pious and po-faced" - but I'm not bothered by other people swearing, @WomanStanleyWoman.

Not if it's the odd swear word, that doesn't bother me , it can be quite funny, plus if you stub your toe, a good few swear words seems to cure it.
On the other hand, if every other word that comes out of your mouth is f this and f that , then yeh, I just think that comes across as abit aggressive and unpleasant to listen to.

I only silently judge when adults swear alot in front of their kids or in front of other children.

@QueenofKattegat

I rarely swear nor does anyone I mix with. If someone swears in my company I will pull them up and ask them to not use such foul language for which there is no excuse

You'd honestly attempt to chastise an adult for the words they choose to use? Please do it and let me know how many different ways you're told to fuck off.

I'm not sure how the word "cunt" is "really quite repulsive both spoken or written down" - it's just four letters and means a "contemptible person" - and most people say it regularly without realising it (by using words like "country" or "Scunthorpe" - although the latter is quite offensive, of course).

I don't usually judge people who swear or think any less of them, I prefer to judge them on their personality, lifestyle and background. The guy I overheard on a bus using the f-word multiple times every sentence (along the lines of "I fucking need to go to the fucking shop because I fucking need some fucking Red Bull to fucking mix with my fucking vodka") I didn't judge because of his prolific use of bad language, but I judged him because he looked pretty rough, sounded pretty thick and he and his girlfriend looked about 18 and kept screaming at their three kids.

A nice person can swear, a scummy person can (sometimes) speak without fucking and blinding. Whether someone swears or not is not a good way of judging a person, look at where they live, their income, and their background to get a good feel for them.

Ps. I don't swear aggressively at people just use it in conversation our a regular FFS when exasperated.