Do you view someone differently if they swear?

[Speckledhem]

I don’t really mind the odd swear word - I swear myself from time to time, but why do people swear inappropriately as in normal sentences or use the C word? Its not that it offends, It’s just really quite repulsive both spoken or written down, I just switch off and lose any respect I would have had for this person.

Is it a regional thing? People just don’t talk like that in my area

Sounds bad but I literally don’t even really notice unless it’s in a wildly inappropriate setting like a church or something. Life’s too short to be offended by swearing ! It’s only words

The only time I view it negatively is if they're swearing at their children (or anyone else's children). Otherwise I don't see it as a problem. My most highly educated friends all swear often. I find people who are shocked by swearing rather po faced, the type of person who uses lace doilies and says 'naice'.

@Gilead

I've met quite a few thick people with PhDs. Intelligence isn't a requirement. But do they also swear? 😉

Yes.

@user9764577436

Don’t understand people who don’t swear or judge others for swearing. They are just words. Why are they offensive?

I’m not one for using cunt but my in-laws are. Can’t say I find them lesser people for using it (except my sister-in-law who frequently calls her mum one - that I hate).

I remember my father-in-law asking quite frequently whether I was offended by swearing and do my family swear or apologising for swearing. My family do and have always sworn. They swore in front of us as children and me and my husband do too.

My nieces and nephews don’t swear because we tell them that they can’t swear until they are adults. They understand so don’t. My children don’t talk yet. And I am aware of not swearing around other people’s children as can respect that not everybody likes swearing around their children. But equally don’t care if others swear around my kids.

I’m not a bad person. I have pride in myself, hold myself well and am polite. I don’t judge people who don’t swear or find it vulgar, just don’t understand what is so upsetting.

Don’t understand people who don’t swear or judge others for swearing. They are just words. Why are they offensive?

That comment is, at best, disingenuous.

As a general rule, I don't swear in front of other people because I am autistic and spend a lot of energy managing my anxiety when dealing with neurotypicals. I don't have the energy to police my language to please them. If NTs don't like the way I speak - calling people like me pious, po-faced, prissy etc - due to my disability, that's a reflection them, not me.

I've met quite a few thick people with PhDs. Intelligence isn't a requirement.
But do they also swear?* 😉
Yes.
Well, that’s me fucked!

Don’t understand people who don’t swear or judge others for swearing. They are just words. Why are they offensive?

The offensiveness is literally in the definition of ‘swear word’: a profane or obscene oath or word. The history of those words is the reason why those specific words are considered swears. As to why I don’t swear - I don’t really see the point of it. It’s not like I’m going around and making a bleeping sound instead of swearing. It’s just not part of the way I talk.

@WomanStanleyWoman

If they swear in an inappropriate setting then I’d view them as someone either with no filter, or with no awareness of social norms (an example would be swearing in a job interview or something).

I said ‘bollocking’ in a job interview once. As soon as it was out I thought ‘Did I really just say that in an interview?’, but I pressed on.

I got the job.

@WomanStanleyWoman

I don't think think a swear word though tbh. Prince William used that word once an am internet when he said that his Grandmother would give him and his cousins "an almighty bollocking" 🤷‍♀️

It seems to me there’s a lot of bullying and ganging up by the swearers on the non-swearers here. Aggressive, smug, arrogant, judgmental and name-calling at the uncool and disabled kids. This thread is quite a revelation.

@daisypond

It seems to me there’s a lot of bullying and ganging up by the swearers on the non-swearers here. Aggressive, smug, arrogant, judgmental and name-calling at the uncool and disabled kids. This thread is quite a revelation.

Yes, and it kind of proves a point about the character of people who go around effing and blinding, doesn't it?

I loathe prissy, pious types and thoroughly enjoy using the most descriptive of swear words in their company. Even my Granny enjoys a good swear in the right context. It's just words!

I don't like excessive swearing but I think people who don't drop the odd swear word and who are outraged at the word fuck are a bit uptight.

@daisypond

It seems to me there’s a lot of bullying and ganging up by the swearers on the non-swearers here. Aggressive, smug, arrogant, judgmental and name-calling at the uncool and disabled kids. This thread is quite a revelation.

And what about the non-swearers who have called people common, thick, less reliable, less helpful, lower class, vile, scummy.

That's not arrogant, judgmental, and smug?

And what about the non-swearers who have called people common, thick, less reliable, less helpful, lower class, vile, scummy.

That's not arrogant, judgmental, and smug?

I am a "non-swearer" because of my disability. I have never called anyone on this thread "common, thick, less reliable, less helpful, lower class, vile or scummy".

My attitude is that I don't care if other people swear or not and I'd like them to extend the same courtesy to me and not call me "pious, po-faced or prissy" because of how I choose to speak.

And for the people who don't like me because I don't swear - it seems a silly reason not to like someone.

I am a "non-swearer" because of my disability. I have never called anyone on this thread "common, thick, less reliable, less helpful, lower class, vile or scummy"

But others have, so I can't see how a PP has the right to call people 'arrogant and judgemental'.

@daisypond

It seems to me there’s a lot of bullying and ganging up by the swearers on the non-swearers here. Aggressive, smug, arrogant, judgmental and name-calling at the uncool and disabled kids. This thread is quite a revelation.

It’s disgusting that you’ve accused people of mocking the disabled with zero evidence.

I do.I swear when I children around.I never use the c word and just wouldn’t dream of it.It shows a lack of respect for those around you who do find it offensive.My husband works on site -swears all the time there if it’s appropriate-whereas a lot of the men he works with, every other word is f,but when other people visit site they alter their language-because they are aware that it it will be offensive to some people.Mind you my DH also makes sure men on site no longer wolf whistle or make lewd comments to women and he said the younger ones actually are far more aware of how they behave-it’s the middle aged men that are the worst apparently!

😂 I don’t swear vehement children are around

Vehement children 😂 I give up
I don’t swear when children are around

It wouldn’t bother me unless it was constant. I used to work in a shipyard and bars, and now i work in a manual, male dominated industry. So I guess you could say I’m used to it!

@Gertie75

I always assume they're a bit thick, my Dad used to tell me that people who swore only did it because they weren't clever enough to win an argument without it.

I do swear occasionally but have found that people who swear in every other sentence are indeed a bit dim.

I am a lawyer - I am sweary, my colleagues are sweary. Several other posters have mentioned lawyers having a penchant for swearing. One QC commented publicly he swears less now he is a judge.

We are all pretty good at winning arguments- after all it’s our job!

Depends on the context. If someone drops something or hurts themselves and they say SHIT or FUCK as a reflex then I wouldn’t think anything of it. If someone swore every other sentence then yeah, I’d think they were a bit of a ruffian.

[quote CecilieRose]@WomanStanleyWoman Most people who think they'd never bully a disabled person wouldn't think twice about mocking someone for not being like them, for being 'po faced' or too serious or not understanding a joke. You know, typical autistic traits.[/quote]
And most people don’t realise that lumping all autistic people together as having ‘typical traits’ does more harm than good. Women in particular struggle to get a diagnosis of autism - and shit like this doesn’t help.

@TheBlackArt

I am a "non-swearer" because of my disability. I have never called anyone on this thread "common, thick, less reliable, less helpful, lower class, vile or scummy"

But others have, so I can't see how a PP has the right to call people 'arrogant and judgemental'.

Well, if people are being arrogant and judgemental then, yes, it's not surprising that other people point this out.

@WomanStanleyWoman how is that relevant? I didn't say all autistic people have them, I said they're typical, because they are.

Stop trying to bulldoze my point, which is that a lot of people who think they're nice and would never bully a disabled person actually do it all the time. I used to get picked on constantly by a group of Mean Girls at a workplace for not being great with social cues or banter. This was absolutely to do with my autism, and was very much something I couldn't help. Most autistic people I know have been bullied and treated cruelly throughout their lives.