WIBU to drop off 6 month old at nursery at 7 even though I don't start work til 9

[Katlow]

Going back to work tomorrow and LO is 6 months old. He's going to nursery a maximum of 3 days a week but it's going to depend on how my husbands shifts fall. I've got no idea what to expect at drop off. I was considering dropping him off early to avoid the hustle and bustle as nursery have said its 'mad' in the morning.
I was thinking I could throw some joggers and a jumper on and drop him off at around 7/7.30 then come home and get ready for work properly.
But then he's woken up this morning (he's usually up at 7) and he's so happy to see me. I don't know how I'd feel about literally getting him up and dressed then straight out the door. :(
How long does nursery drop off usually take? To get in the building etc. I'm so nervous and feeling a little bit guilty.
Bonus points for any answers which tell me how much your 6 month old loved nursery.

I wouldn't unless you actually needed to do that OP. Once your up your up and you might as well get dressed properly. Those baby days fly by I miss them!

[quote Learnthroughplay3]@hotmeatymilk your so nieve they send staged pictures in every nursery I worked in. The reports were usually made up all the way down to what they ate.[/quote]
And what did Ofsted say when you reported this to them?

Moon baby, your last comment is exactly the kind of comment I'm referring to on this thread.....quietly sniping at other people's choices.

People forget that lots of people actually do t have that many choices. They need to work. Their job is where it is and hours might not be flexible, and childcare might be necessary. So then, the comments about baby being better at home or only in childcare for very limited hours are really unhelpful.....and most of all the suggestions that somehow these parents don't value time with their children as highly, or love their kids so much. Can't you see how offensive it is.

People who are in a position to choose whether to work or not, and how much to work and how much to use childcare or not, are very fortunate. They should acknowledge that.
They should also recognise not everyone has the same options and might have to go for options they wouldn't choose.
They should also recognise that there might be merits in other options that they simply haven't experienced, or that the overall outcome of choices might be the thing that swings it...rather than one micro element of the choice.

For some parents, the alternative to long nursery hours, could be a different job which pays much less and could be a family under financial pressure and hardship. Would this be preferable for the small child? Or it could be remaining in rented accommodation thorough out their childhood as a mortgage was never possible....with frequent moves and property insecurity. Or it could be the loss of a career and pension contributions which result in old age poverty. All of these other consequences of work 'choices' need to be considered and factored in...babies are part of families and what is best for the overall family is often what is best for the child too. There is usually a bigger picture and people forget this and only see one small element of the picture and forget other people's 'picture' might be quite different from their own.
Going back to work is hard enough anyway...other women and their thinly veiled judgement really doesn't help.

I’m loving the idea of all these 6 month-olds clock-watching and having a keen sense of being anywhere for 10 hours vs 6 hours. Their little minds thinking “oh, it’s so long till home time”. That’s not how babies’ minds work. Thinking about the experience in terms of its length is a total red herring.

@haveringwavering I didn't report to ofstead I reported to the boss owners of nursery at the time I didn't realise I should have done that. I actually risked my job at one point for a particular situation.again not the best way I could have dealt with it. But Whatever way I dealt with it at the time doesn't takeaway from the point being made here

I think one of the biggest issues is the bad pay for people working in nurseries/ creches. It's so wrong as it is very hard, demanding work. I noticed that people working in these jobs got burnt out, frustrated and demotivated and then that didn't lead to the best care of the small children. That was my observation and I did report things I saw.
I totally get how difficult it is for working parents though particularly without a network of support.

Given it's only three days a week and he'll be with you the other four, I world do exactly what you are considering. That time for you might be important for your mental health/ to feel 'together' for work etc!! Don't let anyone else make you feel bad for that. Some mothers think that a child needs their mother for every single second you're awake and how dare you do something not with them! You do you op.

Bit annoyed I never thought of doing this myself! Of course it's fine, you are paying for the full day. If I ever finished work early I would take the opportunity to use that last hour of childcare and go shopping or run errands.

@nomoneytreehere

Totally off topic but gosh your nursery is cheap. Even the local authority one where I am is over £60.

£40 per day is standard where I live (North east England)

@Hardbackwriter

It's just so weird to think of having a baby, then at 6mths chucking it into daycare for 11hrs

Oh, I have very strong views on this. OP should definitely be handing the baby over to the keyworker, not throwing him at them. In fact - and I know some people will say this is judgy but I'm not afraid to say it - I actually think you should never chuck a baby, even if you are a stay at home mother.

Brilliant 😂

@hotmeatymilk your so nieve they send staged pictures in every nursery I worked in. The reports were usually made up all the way down to what they ate.
Tbh I applaud them if they’re able to care for multiple babies and toddlers and wrangle them into staged photos (can’t even get DD to smile on cue, personally) and create a pack of lies for the reports, including the meals (I find it hard enough thinking about what to make for tea, myself) – what wonderful time management!

I imagine it would probably be a smidge easier to just take snapshots of the day’s activities and write down the menu as-is, but I’m not highly trained in such things, just a simpleton out to scrape together a living while neglecting my emotionally stunted child.

babies are part of families and what is best for the overall family is often what is best for the child too. There is usually a bigger picture and people forget this and only see one small element of the picture and forget other people's 'picture' might be quite different from their own.
Going back to work is hard enough anyway...other women and their thinly veiled judgement really doesn't help.

This. A million times.

Lulu2021 average is £57 per day in the area of North West I am. We've got a steal at £49, it was by far the cheapest I could find.

Also children are sponges if a child hears uve had a really good day today haven't you you will tell your mummy how much fun you have had here's a sticker etc maybe the child cant understand the reality.
Ahahahahahahaha you’ve never met a child in your life, have you? They’re not sponges, they’re contrarians who fucking love shouting “No!”

@JoborPlay

Lulu2021 average is £57 per day in the area of North West I am. We've got a steal at £49, it was by far the cheapest I could find.

Wow! Like I say nurseries in the north east in the area I live are £40 on average and the childminder I use is actually a little cheaper at £38 per day. Childcare cost variations are crazy.

@hotmeatymilk I wouldn't admire a nursery nurse writing down in a child's record they ate a food that they didn't or couldn't remember what they ate so just wrote whatever baby jar they could think of down this is dangerous for lots of reasons in my opinion I wouldn't apriciate that as a parent.

Is it really £44 a day? 😦 Where I live it’s £90 a MONTHS including proper breakfast, home cooked lunch/dinner, fruit and afternoon snack. University educated nursery teachers only. But you can’t leave them until they are one.

if you think they are not sponges you need a reality check, how would you imagine grooming would work??
I think they use brushes not sponges but tbh I don’t do a lot of dressage.

@WombatChocolate

Meh, there are parenting decisions i make that others judge me on, we all do it whether consciously or not. Most of our decisions are based on how we prefer to do parenting, and that's usually because we feel that it's the best course of action (either for our specific child or when child rearing in general).

Bottle vs breast, weaning, behavioural strategies, babywearing, rear facing car seats, baby reins, childcare, screentime, bedtime, co-sleeping, sleep training. All parenting decisions (often impacted by circumstance and necessity) that people have views on.

For me personally, I'd certainly live longer in a rented or smaller house, than go to a job that required long periods in childcare from a few months old. You may think that's OTT. That's your call.

Then again, there are women who ensure multiple bouts of mastitis and agonising pain, and a drastic elimination diet to breastfeed. I personally wouldn't do that, but if it's an important parenting decision to someone, then that's fine for them.

Then again, there are women who ensure multiple bouts of mastitis and agonising pain, and a drastic elimination diet to breastfeed.

Oh this is familiar 😂

Ignore the judgy people who think you are harming your child by having him spend much of his day in a safe loving environment with people who aren't his parents. There is absolutely nothing wrong with dropping him off early if it makes your day easier and less stressful. In fact, it will be better for him to have a mum who is more relaxed and less stressed.
It might take you a little while to find the routine that works best for you all, so don't be afraid to experiment (presumably the nursery will be flexible about when you drop him off). At his age he will adapt so easily - much better than he would in a few months.

Then again, there are women who ensure multiple bouts of mastitis and agonising pain, and a drastic elimination diet to breastfeed.
Did you read my diary.

@Anonymice1

Is it really £44 a day? 😦 Where I live it’s £90 a MONTHS including proper breakfast, home cooked lunch/dinner, fruit and afternoon snack. University educated nursery teachers only. But you can’t leave them until they are one.

90 pounds a month???? That's just pennies an hour. That can't be right. Where do you live?

Its true though, everyone has certain parenting issues etc that are important to them, and ones that are less important to them. And for the ones that we individually deem most important, most of us will put ourselves through a lot for it. And that's fine, surely.

I'm certainly not saying that a woman shouldn't put herself through a lot to breastfeed, or that she should, but it's a personal thing.

Just the same as some women will go without decent food themselves to make sure that their child has the best diet they can.

We go through extraordinary lengths for our children sometimes.