If this thread is for real, I can’t believe anytime would drop a baby at a nursery at 7am, just so they could do their make-up, etc! 7am! It will be pitch black and freezing these next few months. I mean, if you worked shifts and had to do this, then I guess needs must. But I can’t believe anyone would choose to this otherwise.
At six months, the baby is only forming a concept of himself / herself as separate to you. They are only just realising that they can be ‘abandoned.’ This is why this is the stage when separation anxiety can set in. From an adult point of view, you might find it easier to just tell yourself this is a ‘just a stage.’ Something happening ‘out of sight, out of mind.’ But think about it from the baby’s experience. This is extremely traumatic.
The baby’s brain is forming and what happens in these early months is the blueprint for their expectations and learned responses in later life.
I’m sure many nursery staff are lovely and do their best. But, when all is said and done, they are on next to MW. They will have kids if their own or other preoccupations. There is a lot of admin in that job that’s highly frustrating. They don’t ‘love’ your babies. It’s a job for them - and a hard one at that.
Your child will get used to the nursery environment because children adapt and they have to. What choice do they actually have? How can they rationalise what’s happening img to them?
7am to 6pm is an incredibly long day in an environment which, even in the nicest sense of the word, is an institution. Other babies crying in the background makes for an extremely stressful atmosphere for them. It only takes one to be ill or unsettled.
They will learn to explore the world using a keyworker as the ‘secure base’ instead of you for the time they are there. All children need a secure base to make sense of the world. It depends on the nursery and the key worker and how distracted they are by other babies / admin / their own preoccupations as to how this goes.
I’ve sat in playgroups and observed babies and toddlers as part of my training. You see the ones come in with the mums or the childminders who are in it for more than the money. The babies crawl or wander off, find a toy, and then turn round for affirmation from the mum. Or they might bring it over to show her and want it explained / recognised.
Then there are others who play in a much more insular way. They never turn round to see if the caregiver is watching them or interested because they have already learned this will not be the case. They already have the internal model that they cannot expect this validation. These ‘models’ set in early.
This is not meant to be ‘mum guilt’ as babies are resilient and will survive. But I don’t think we should underestimate the impact of an 11 hour day in a nursery setting. Look at it from the child’s point of view - not just what is easiest for the mum.