Teacher calling DD “Thing”

[ThingDDUR]

In the context I have no issue with it but ExH does so wondered if I’m UR?

Parents evening, chatting away and the teacher says “But generally (DDs name) is such a funny little thing, we’re always laughing when she’s in the room” then starts smiling and laughing while telling us some funny stories about DD (nothing naughty or bad, more pulling her jumper on after PE and shouting “Oh look here I am again” with a massive grin on her face or asking the headteacher if she’s old or very very old now on her birthday)

ExH wants me to complain to the headteacher tomorrow about the use of the word thing. I think it’s absolutely fine as she wasn’t calling DD “thing” in a derogatory way and it was just a clumsy choice of word.

So who is UR? Me or ExH?

DD is 7, just started Year 3 if it helps. The teacher also referred to DD a lot by her preferred name (a short version of her name) and this was the only time she said thing in reference to DD, otherwise it was always her full name, her short name or her full name (say her names Elizabeth Smith, teacher called her Elizabeth Smith, Elizabeth or Lizzie apart from when saying about her being a "funny little thing"). DD is also smaller in height than her friends so that might be where little comes from as I have heard her classmates call her Little Lizzie and similar as there is another Elizabeth/Lizzie in her class (obviously not her actual name thats just for example)

Vote:
YANBU - You're right the teacher was fine to use "thing"
YABU - ExH is right report to HT

It's just colloquial - nothing to complain about I suspect the teacher rather likes her, tell him don't rock the boat and complain.

Your DH sounds like a joy. It was a lovely, affectionate comment and complaining will waste so much of the principals time, and no doubt be upsetting for the teacher who did nothing wrong.

Times like this I despair.

Your poor daughter if he does complain about a term of endearment. He’s fucking bat shit.

Does he always want you to do his dirty work?
Idiot.

My dd was called a ‘little minx’ by her teacher. I wasn’t too pleased, but didn’t complain. Your ex is bonkers
This is another common term that is regularly used without any negative connotations.

ExH wants me to complain to the headteacher tomorrow about the use of the word thing

Does your DH not have the ability to operate a phone, computer or a pencil so that he can make his complaints all by himself?

Why on earth would he think you would complain about something that bothers him but not you?!

@MyMabel

You’re ex is a funny little thing.

No dear, he's a proper little wanker.

he’s an idiot and he wants YOU to complain….. twat

Why didn't you tell your ex to fuck off?

@Cottonheadedninymuggins

He's definitely being unreasonable.

I call my nephew 'thing 1' and as yet unborn niece of nephew 'thing 2' all completely meant with love and affection. It makes him giggle even at not quite 3!

I know someone who lost twins so her surviving DCs are Thing 1 and Thing 4. It's lovely, I think.

Ignore him. Why does he want you to complain on his behalf? If he was that bothered he’d do it himself. You aren’t his secretary.

No wonder he's your Ex he sounds like a right prat, tell him to stop trying to cause trouble for people and get Over it. X

Why does he expect you to complain to the headteacher? Can he not do it himself?

@ThingDDUR

Both native brits, but ExH likes an excuse to complain about anything to do with the school.

Then let him complain, the staff would like a good laugh.

Tell him to complain then… if the head is sane then she’ll also think your dh is a twat

Why exactly does he expect you to do the complaining?

To complain about this would be very spiteful. I would have 100% taken it as a term of endearment.

Seriously though, for all those saying that the teachers will have a laugh about it in the staffroom, a complaint like this can be the straw that breaks the camel's back, for a stressed-out teacher.

Having a parent complain when you've been actively nice and affectionately appreciative about their child is a kick in the teeth of an entirely different level. Something like that leaves you nowhere to go. Nothing about your job that's worthwhile. She's more likely to cry than laugh.

I think you should just be glad he's an exH. He sounds bizarre.

YANBU

...actually, a decent head won't pass on such a complaint to the teacher. They'll want to protect them from such ridiculousness. But of course not all heads are decent. And some of the decent but less confident ones feel obliged to go through the complaint process, and that will involve the teacher.

He's being ridiculous! My DD13 was often described as a funny little thing when she was younger. We always tell her she is small and very funny ( from Charlie and Lola) She is just one of those kids that's comes out with funny and endearing stuff all the time and happens to be small for her age too.

I say this about dd2 all the time 😬

Complaints like this are why some teachers give very bland feedback.

I am a retired teacher. There are always a few parents who find something/ANYTHING to complain about. Does he really want to be one of them? Believe me, their complaints are laughed off.