Teacher calling DD “Thing”

[ThingDDUR]

In the context I have no issue with it but ExH does so wondered if I’m UR?

Parents evening, chatting away and the teacher says “But generally (DDs name) is such a funny little thing, we’re always laughing when she’s in the room” then starts smiling and laughing while telling us some funny stories about DD (nothing naughty or bad, more pulling her jumper on after PE and shouting “Oh look here I am again” with a massive grin on her face or asking the headteacher if she’s old or very very old now on her birthday)

ExH wants me to complain to the headteacher tomorrow about the use of the word thing. I think it’s absolutely fine as she wasn’t calling DD “thing” in a derogatory way and it was just a clumsy choice of word.

So who is UR? Me or ExH?

DD is 7, just started Year 3 if it helps. The teacher also referred to DD a lot by her preferred name (a short version of her name) and this was the only time she said thing in reference to DD, otherwise it was always her full name, her short name or her full name (say her names Elizabeth Smith, teacher called her Elizabeth Smith, Elizabeth or Lizzie apart from when saying about her being a "funny little thing"). DD is also smaller in height than her friends so that might be where little comes from as I have heard her classmates call her Little Lizzie and similar as there is another Elizabeth/Lizzie in her class (obviously not her actual name thats just for example)

Vote:
YANBU - You're right the teacher was fine to use "thing"
YABU - ExH is right report to HT

[Moonlaserbearwolf]

If your ex complains, the Head will think he is crazy.

[Cottonheadedninymuggins]

He's definitely being unreasonable.

I call my nephew 'thing 1' and as yet unborn niece of nephew 'thing 2' all completely meant with love and affection. It makes him giggle even at not quite 3!

[LorenzoVonMatterhorn]

Your ex is a twat of the highest order.

[CarryOnNurse20]

Please don’t complain you will both look utterly ridiculous.

[BogglesAndBots]

I'd say it's a reasonably common turn of phrase / term of endearment - I've referred to children I teach (YR) as a 'dear little thing' on many occasions. Generally followed up with an example of their kindness of just how they make us smile/laugh etc.

Its just an expression. I can see it might perhaps sound like a slightly odd turn of phrase to those who haven't heard it being used before, but I don't think it's uncommon.

If your ExH has an issue and would prefer DDs teacher didn't use that phrase, then I'm sure he's more than capable of contacting the teacher himself to make that request.

[tiredanddangerous]

Why does he want you to complain? Surely if he has an issue he can call the school himself.

He's being utterly ridiculous.

[whistleryukon]

If I were you I would wish to make it as clear as possible to school staff that this man was a separate entity to me, and that I found him
utterly unreasonable. And why's he even dragging you into his complaint? I'm sure he's perfectly capable of embarrassing himself.

[Terminallysleepdeprived]

Your exh is a dick.

[HoHoHoHoHoHoHo]

I can see why your ex is your ex!!

This is totally bonkers! It's a totally affectionate term.

[TopCatsTopHat]

It's just an expression not a derogatory insult.
The poor teacher if that comes in as a complaint, you can't police people's language to the point that they have to have a script! It's common parlance and not remotely insulting.
If the teacher said I don't want that thing in my class ever again it'd be another matter.

[SeraphinaDombegh]

Your ex is being utterly ridiculous. Seriously!

[Whitecushion]

If you complained you would make that lovely teacher feel awful even if she knew the complaint was completely unjustified and mad. So hurtful.

[Fallagain]

“ ExH wants me to complain to the headteacher”.

Does he normally try and tell you what to do? Tell him that you won’t be complaining but he is free to do whatever he wants.

[sakura06]

'Funny little thing' 'sweet little thing' are expressions! Can't believe he's upset at that (unless not a native speaker?!).

[MadMadMadamMim]

It's not a clumsy choice of word. It's a perfectly normal, English colloquialism.

Tell Ex-Dickhead to crack on and complain if he wants to be seen as the twat he is. Why should you get involved?

[londonrach]

Vvv strange ex ...hence why an ex...it's a phase...

[GettingLardy]

When I read shit like this, I'm glad I no longer teach.

[ThingDDUR]

I only said clumsily worded because I've never heard a teacher refer to a child like that and genuinely thought she meant something like "DDs very funny" I was never going to complain about it.

DD absolutely loves this teacher, and that's clearly showing if she's being funny and a bit silly in class.

[bowlingalleyblues]

If you want to give the teacher a hilarious story to entertain their friends and family with at Christmas, go right ahead.

[TillyTopper]

He's bonkers. If he has an issue he needs to take it up, not you.

[sakura06]

Absolutely do not complain to the Head. If he wants to, fine. But he is being deeply unpleasant. This will probably ruin the teacher's day, if not their whole week (unless they're very thick skinned). What a horrible man.

[Chloemol]

Your ex is nuts

Let him complain if he wants to, but in the context of what was being said I dont see any issue

[toocold54]

Your ex is a twat!
Is he the type to get annoyed when someone calls her a girl because they’re assuming her gender

[Liverbird77]

Don't do this. It would be absolutely outrageous.

[coffeepleeease]

Ex is being an idiot