If there were zombies..

[julieca]

Do you think you would survive in a zombie apocalypse?

YABU - no, not a chance they would catch me and eat me.

YANBU - I would survive and would be fine.

I think I’d be ok against the zombies, it’s the desperate humans who might want to rob me that would be more terrifying.

I'd like to turn this around a bit.

If I were a zombie, you would have nothing to fear from me as I (1) am autistic and probably would not be comfortable with other zombies or them with me and (2) have a rotten sense of direction so even if I did find my tribe when all of them turned left I'd turn right.

If I lost my specs I’d be dead. But I’d use my Drayton manor park glasses holders tight around my neck. Or I’d raid Specsavers and take all their contact lenses in my eye power. The monthly ones. I’d just keep them in my eyes forever.

Also, recently my dc started cadets and I didn’t realise we had army type areas like this in our city. They apparently have shooting practice inside, so that’s where I’d go for guns. I’d raid all the cadets nearby. That was a recent revelation, and I’m quite happy I know where to get any type of shotgun now if there’s a zombie apocalypse.

Have you been talking to my 9 year old son? He literally asked me the same question yesterday evening

I'd be the token middle aged woman who got consumed expendibly & unremarkably in about the early/middle of the movie version.

Don’t think I’d stand a chance unless I could hold a place right behind Daryl. My son and I have devised a plan, however, and I figure if there is ever some kind of national emergency, we both know where to go to find each other so it’s no bad thing to think about these things.

@TheWoleb there’s something a bit enchanting about that - “wld die showing off in a fight with a zombie”.

Hopefully I can sneak past while all this is happening.

I quite fancy my chances…. We grow veg, keep chickens and live next to a shooting range, so lots of guns and a strong safe room.

We’ve discussed this at length and sadly the first thing we’ll have to shoot is our dog. He barks too much and would draw the zombies in, so I’d have to kill him myself so he doesn’t get us killed or suffer at the hands of the zombies.

I've watched tons of survival films, am bloody stubborn, have a cold blooded streak a mile wide where people are concerned and I won't be the idiot woman who gets pregnant in the middle of the End of the World As We Know It. Plus I'm a damn good shot, have a cast iron stomach, a shit hot immune system and a good couple of years months of fat reserves.

Assuming that DP doesn't go all mithery on me just as a horde are descending, I think I'd be OK for a while as a camp medic/vet quietly putting people down the moment they show any signs of illness.

@Mypathtriedtokillme

I’m in Australia. Give it 3 weeks and the fly population would of dealt with any dead shamblers.

I’m currently planning for the post zombie, fly apocalypse the truely awful apocalypse.

Actually far worse than zombies - shudder.

I’m in Australia

So either the snakes and spiders will take down the zombies.
Or you Aussies will with your bare hands, crack open a fosters and have a bbq on the beach wondering why the rest of the world are being eaten alive.

@SleepingStandingUp

Well I'm an iZombie kind girl so I'd just get a nice one to scratch me and eat *@Coffeeonmytoffee, @spidersareshitheads, @Kanaloa* and a few others

😂

Please just make sure you kill me correctly and do not leave me in the moral hell of being bitten on the leg and having to make the decision or whether or not I will tell the ragtag group I’m travelling with. I am extremely selfish and will just wait until I turn in the night and kill them all because I’d be scared to die.

The fly problem is so interesting - I’ve often thought surely maggots would eat zombies quite quickly but maybe they turn so many new people it doesn’t matter.

Either way disease caused by lack of hygiene plus no medical care would probably kill those tough enough to fight of zombies which would actually be more annoying. Fighting off a hundred zombies with a knitting needle and a fire extinguisher then dying of toothache or an ingrown toenail or something.

Yes, all those people fighting off zombies and jumping off roofs or running for miles would in reality end up with broken legs or sprained ankles. Also, the sheer anxiety of living like that would make some people go mad.

I would happily join the zombie army, I couldn't be doing with all the scavenging for food and shelter

Depends if they are the fast moving angry Black Summer type or the slower lurching Walking Dead type.

Depends on the abilities of the zombies, how the infection spreads and what areas could be secured against them and how fast would people turn before you could escape to safety.

DD 1 says she will top herself, lives on the 42nd floor of an apartment building and has a balcony.
I live in the burbs and am slow. Can zombies swim? I may take to the pool.
Aussies don’t drinks fosters @Mymapuddlington so may make a pitcher of daiquiri to take with me.
I would go sozzled and we’ll marinated

Thanks to this thread, I had a terrifying zombie dream last night. It was the ‘I Am Legend’ zombie vampire hybrid type set up when they only come out at night but are terrifying. It was winter so the nights started at 4 and we had to be very quiet and stay in the dark while we listened to them search outside. Then they found us Shudder. I needed my coffee this morning.

@bloodywhitecat

I have chickens. Chickens are killers. Chickens will make mincemeat of any zombie so I will be OK.

Oh god No! It starts with chickens eating zombies and will end with the little feckers eating my eyeballs in my sleep…

I’ve seen them eyeing me up already with that creepy sideways head tilt.

50/50 chance I’d survive the zombie apocalypse, I reckon. Starvation, contaminated drinking water and non-zombie raiding parties would be my most likely downfall.

My skillset would be best matched to rebuilding civilisation in the post apocalyptic world. I would bargain my tools and knowledge for food and protection.

@Kanaloa

The fly problem is so interesting - I’ve often thought surely maggots would eat zombies quite quickly but maybe they turn so many new people it doesn’t matter.

Either way disease caused by lack of hygiene plus no medical care would probably kill those tough enough to fight of zombies which would actually be more annoying. Fighting off a hundred zombies with a knitting needle and a fire extinguisher then dying of toothache or an ingrown toenail or something.

I figure it would be like when they leave bodies outside to see how long they rot which isn’t long.

They would be corpses in the open with no embalming, large open wounds so they would be a maggots mess in no time.
Each fly lays about 100 eggs each batch which take 7-24 hours to hatch, eat for 4 -7 days then pupate into more flies which take a week to hatch, each fly lays 4 clutches of eggs each in the lifetime of 4-8 weeks.

So really there would be a eleven billionity flies in no time at all s as me that’s not counting ants or anything else that eats dead things.

So we need to keep insects alive and in healthy populations to save us all from the zombie apocalypse and live somewhere warm cause it would take less time for them to decompose (like sweaty Humid Georgia)

I would join them.😁

If it was a brief disaster I'd be ok. In fact if it was a weekend I'd probably not know it had happened and would emerge on monday like the start of "28 Days Later"

We live up a steep hill. If I can chuck something slippy down their, hopefully they won't make it up here or at least it'll give me time to plan my next move. So hopefully might last a bit longer than others. If the zombies are lazy they might struggle to get up here anyway lol.