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Original poster

Naked toddler in swimming pool showers

338 replies

Noodella18 · 08/10/2021 14:35

I take my 2 year old swimming on Fridays. After the session we take a shower in the communal showers, next to the lockers and by the entrance to the pool. I didn't think twice about stripping off her swimming costume to wash her but the lifeguard told me today that she wasn't allowed to be nude 'because it's a public area' and she had to keep it on. Am I being naive in thinking that a naked two year old is really no big deal?

Yanbu - no harm in a naked 2 year old
Yabu - keep the cossie on

OP posts:
Spudina · 09/10/2021 09:43

Standard protocol at most swimming baths.

FKATondelayo · 09/10/2021 09:43

Every local pool I use has Female Changing Rooms, Male Changing Rooms or Family cubicles. Is this not the norm? There are private shower cubicles in all - including the council run one. That's how dads & daughters / mums & sons get changed. If you don't have family changing rooms then you change your kid in a private cubicle in the changing room you can use.

When I grew up in the 80s everyone changed in a cubicle. Our local pool was almost all cubicles. No-one changed in communal areas. Why has this changed? Why are leisure centre architects are making us all get naked in front of one another? Hmm

No-one ever grew up and said "well my childhood was great but if only my parents had let me be naked in front of other people more often." You're the parent, put some clothes on your kid in public.

(Everyone knows why female sex offender numbers have risen. Police officers record by gender id not sex for the past 5 years and cross-dressing high corresponds to other paraphilias.)

Lockdownbear · 09/10/2021 09:50

The mother who I know went to jail, the photos were of her DD who was 2 or 3 at the time.
Was definitely a woman, no transgender anything, and was pregnant with her second child when she was on bail.

If she was prepared to share photos of her DD, how can anyone tell me other women wouldn't share photos of other random children, if they can get access. Either for financial reasons, blackmail or their own kicks.

Trust nobody!

Pythonista · 09/10/2021 09:56

@anonymousanne

God 🙄🙄 apologies to all the perfect parents out there 🤦‍♀️ she's 2 for goodness sake... not 12. She doesn't like even a tiny drop of water on her clothes and can get undressed at lightening speed 🤷🏼‍♀️ I'm sure before the age it's inappropriate she will have grown out of it. Chill out 🙃🙃 And if you feel uncomfortable at the sight of a naked two year old you really need to question yourself on why that is 🤔🤔🤔 cos that response makes me feel a bit uncomfortable about you. And as for pedos... well we have communal changing areas only at swimming, separated only by male or female adults. There could be plenty of pedos in there 🤷🏼‍♀️
It isn't that people are uncomfortable for a dodgy reason. Your kid may be able to take her clothes off at 'lightning speed' but I doubt it's quicker than you can stop her.

Even if you are cool with your kid doing this, a cafe is not the place. And the difference between now and back in the day is camera phones. Try protecting your child.

Pythonista · 09/10/2021 09:57

And the argument about plenty of paedos is even more reason not to let your kid randomly take her clothes off in public

ThirdElephant · 09/10/2021 10:00

@anonymousanne

God 🙄🙄 apologies to all the perfect parents out there 🤦‍♀️ she's 2 for goodness sake... not 12. She doesn't like even a tiny drop of water on her clothes and can get undressed at lightening speed 🤷🏼‍♀️ I'm sure before the age it's inappropriate she will have grown out of it. Chill out 🙃🙃 And if you feel uncomfortable at the sight of a naked two year old you really need to question yourself on why that is 🤔🤔🤔 cos that response makes me feel a bit uncomfortable about you. And as for pedos... well we have communal changing areas only at swimming, separated only by male or female adults. There could be plenty of pedos in there 🤷🏼‍♀️
  1. It's already inappropriate.
  2. Keeping clothes on your kid in public hardly requires perfect parenting. If she has form for this bring a towel or poncho or something with you.
  3. You state that people being uncomfortable when confronted with a naked child in a café makes you feel uncomfortable about those people. Why are you allowing your kid to be naked in front of those people then?
  4. If there's no changing cubicles at all at your local swimming baths (highly unusual) at least someone sat there with their phone out taking pictures would draw some attention (hopefully). In a café that wouldn't be the case at all- perfectly normal to have your phone out. Far greater risk.
  5. People eat in cafés. Being naked in them is unsanitary.
anonymousanne · 09/10/2021 10:10

@ThirdElephant

  1. 2 year olds don't have much concept of inappropriate.
  2. Had a towel, thanks 👍
  3. That was in reply to someone else's comment. I wouldn't have thought a 2 year old would make anyone feel uncomfortable... but then I don't over sexualise the naked body, especially of children 🤷🏼‍♀️
  4. There are no changing cubicles in the (private) pool we use.. believe that or not I don't care 🤷🏼‍♀️ and unless I have eyes in the back of my head I cannot comment on what the other mums are doing.
  5. Again, she's two! She's not fussed about that sort of thing!
SueSaid · 09/10/2021 10:14

'2 year olds don't have much concept of inappropriate.'

Exactly. That is where parenting comes in.

2yr olds needs protecting, this naive 'she's not fussed!' Attitude is absolutely staggering. You be fussed. You, the parent.

ThirdElephant · 09/10/2021 10:19

[quote anonymousanne]@ThirdElephant

  1. 2 year olds don't have much concept of inappropriate.
  2. Had a towel, thanks 👍
  3. That was in reply to someone else's comment. I wouldn't have thought a 2 year old would make anyone feel uncomfortable... but then I don't over sexualise the naked body, especially of children 🤷🏼‍♀️
  4. There are no changing cubicles in the (private) pool we use.. believe that or not I don't care 🤷🏼‍♀️ and unless I have eyes in the back of my head I cannot comment on what the other mums are doing.
  5. Again, she's two! She's not fussed about that sort of thing! [/quote]
  6. Doesn't matter if two year olds have a concept of what's inappropriate- you do.
  7. Then why did you not wrap the towel around her while you ran to get new clothes? Or did you and you just failed to mention that for added lolz?
  8. Clearly though, some people are uncomfortable with naked children around them, likely some people at the café were.
  9. And the people in the café with their phones out?
  10. Your two year old not caring that it's unsanitary doesn't make it OK! Egad, do you think you have no responsibility for her behaviour at all? If she smeared excrement on the chairs would that be OK because she's two and doesn't care? As PP said, it's your job. You should care!
Pythonista · 09/10/2021 10:19

That wasn't answering the unsanitary comment.

And 2 year olds don't have a concept of inappropriate which is why they have PARENTS. If you can't keep your kid from doing that then you need to not take her anywhere til she can be relied upon not to do it.

I am a little disturbed that you think people being uncomfortable about your child running round naked is a sexual thing. The only people who would be 'comfortable' in the way you imply are perhaps the ones you need to worry about.

Pythonista · 09/10/2021 10:20

But then you clearly have a very relaxed attitude to the possibility of perverts with smartphones

MelKarnofskyCrane · 09/10/2021 11:17

We go swimming at a local leisure club. There is a family there who let their toddlers run about stark naked in the cafe/soft play area. It drives me demented. One of them wee’d on the floor and the mum pretended not to notice.

People simply do not want to see it.

On the other hand, the other day a woman was walking about stark naked in the female changing area. Fine. But she turned to my four year old and snapped “it’s rude to stare!” I was mortified (I had told four year old more than once not to stare but she’s four and probably curious). I did feel a little bit like, is all this striding around in the buff in a busy changing room really necessary??

Mantlemoose · 09/10/2021 11:19

I wouldn't expose my naked child to all and sundry.

notacooldad · 09/10/2021 11:22

*Babies/toddlers young children should not be nude in public even if it is at a swimming pool shower.(

What?! Even on the beach?!
Especially on a beach!

somewhereoverthechipshop · 09/10/2021 11:22

It’s sad, but I do understand. When my teen was 2 I let her toddle on the beach naked. Until one old man actually wolf whistled and another was blatantly leering. Times have changed. I wouldn’t feel comfortable with my youngest child being naked sorry.

Blossomtoes · 09/10/2021 11:24

@Ellarain

The lifeguard was correct. Babies/toddlers young children should not be nude in public even if it is at a swimming pool shower.
He wasn’t. Do you want to bring up a child who’s ashamed of their body?
Lockdownbear · 09/10/2021 11:27

@MelKarnofskyCrane those kids need reported. It really isn't appropriate not to mention it won't take long for pedo circles to get to know about it. And flock to the softplay.

I'm surprised the softplay are OK with it. Many ask for kids to be dressed in trousers / long sleeves to avoid rub burns on slides etc.

Lockdownbear · 09/10/2021 11:28

@Blossomtoes not ashamed of their body more their body is theirs private and not for public viewing.

TacoTues · 09/10/2021 11:29

My best friend used to manage a big leisure centre with mixed pool changing.

They had multiple problems with paedos/perverts and made me promise to never shower my DC naked at any age.

MelKarnofskyCrane · 09/10/2021 11:30

I honestly don’t understand why none of the staff have intervened (of course it’s entirely possible they they have and I just haven’t witnessed it). They are quite…loud and abrasive and the soft play area and cafe are staffed by mainly teenagers so I wonder if they are maybe scared to say anything.

I think if it happens again I’ll complain to the management. It’s just so inappropriate and uncomfortable.

sqirrelfriends · 09/10/2021 11:37

@GoWalkabout

Unfortunately swimming pools have an issue with voyeuristic paedophiles lurking especially in mixed changing areas, so I think its ok for them to have a policy
Angry
SleepOhHowIMissYou · 09/10/2021 11:48

I do think we should preserve our children's autonomy where their bodies are concerned. Private parts have that name for a reason.

Take the man suing because his naked image was used on Nirvana's Nevermind album when he was a baby. He had no say it that. Same with your children. Would you be happy for someone else to decide that anyone who cares to gets to look at your genitals?

Lockdownbear · 09/10/2021 11:49

Mixed sex with cubicles makes more sense for families, and parents with opposite seed children.

MintyGreenDream · 09/10/2021 11:51

@somewhereoverthechipshop did anyone confront him or worse? Thats appalling

Lockdownbear · 09/10/2021 11:58

@somewhereoverthechipshop I don't so much think times have changed, I think normal people are just more aware.

Digital photos, and Internet make it very easy to share images but peados, have always been there. They were called other things, strange men, but people knew who not to trust.