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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what age you suddenly really started to age?

488 replies

Onedaylikethis21 · 07/10/2021 17:09

I feel like at 48, I have really started to age- creepy neck, a bit jowly, going a bit grey and not feeling great to be honest! I look after myself - don’t really drink as I see it on my face, wear nice clothes, nice hair etc but it’s becoming an effort ☹️ Wasn’t expecting it actually!! I always thought I looked pretty good for my age. I know it’s vain and I shouldn’t care but it’s just weird!!

OP posts:
WhenPushComesToShove · 09/10/2021 01:02

I've begun to look more and more like my Mum when I look in the mirror but I adored her so I don't mind at all. I'm actually most amused that I'm so grown up and just feel happy to be alive and healthy after a major bereavement 5 years ago which made me value even more, every moment I have with my loved ones. I'm mid 60s now

newfriend05 · 09/10/2021 02:03

Was doing ok .. but turned 50 just before lockdown one and that and being pre menopause has aged me massively..

TwinMama6 · 09/10/2021 07:55

@ParkheadParadise

38, when dd1 died. It's 6 years now and when I look back at photos I look so different. I lost weight and was probably a size 6 for about 2 years after and didn't sleep much. The last 6 years has aged me. I'm now back at my normal size 12.
I’m sorry for your loss 😢💐💐
Stumpie222 · 09/10/2021 08:25

Get a grip you lot! I’m approaching my 76th birthday and, along with my peer group, have only just begun to feel the onset of old age in the last year. We still all adore fashion and make-up as much now as we did in our twenties. Perhaps being relieved of the pressures of work and family responsibilities has something to do with it!

anon666 · 09/10/2021 09:06

Late 40s for me. Can't recall the exact date but from 45 onwards each year has taken its toll more heavily than the last. 😔

I'll be honest it is a bit depressing. There is so much more to life than being pretty but it was nice while it lasted.

From now on I feel like people might think "I bet she used to be attractive" rather than being good looking in the present.

On the flipside I do think that age brings a lot of compensations. Financial security, wisdom, mental stability, self-fulfilment.

It definitely feels now like life isn't a rehearsal it's now. So I refuse to ruin it worrying about looks.

Jackburger · 09/10/2021 09:07

I think it comes in stages as PPs have said. I remember seeing very fine lines at 24 and using lots of expensive eye creams. After having a child at 30 I remember suddenly looking older and I looked different but couldn't quite work out why. In my mid 30s I got into fitness (ended up working in the industry) and definitely looked my best as my skin was still good. The next phase came in late 40s with peri-menopause. Would get ready for a night out then look in the mirror and go 'oh'. Just started to look middle aged. Eyelids dropped so my eyes didn't stand out any more. I'm now 53 and in menopause (on HRT) and have started to notice the skin on my arms looking a bit bobbly which I'm annoyed about as I've always worked hard on them with weights and they've always been pretty good! I think the pandemic has made me less adventurous about going out and I've got lazy with socialising. I'm now trying to make more of an effort going out and doing interesting things. Happy to be still here and (hopefully) healthy though as that's the main thing now.

Thatsnotall · 09/10/2021 09:22

39 an it was almost overnight. My face looked like it had melted into my neck with jowling and no laxity. Same for the rest of my body as my thoughts suddenly went from fairly ‘normal’ to saggy and cellulite-ridden. Also very veiny. Also, I was suddenly finding it impossible to lose weight whereas previously when I tried it would happen, suddenly it became an enormously challenging act and the slightest pound takes more effort than I’d ever really experienced before.

I’m now a few years on and the change in me (which isn’t menopausal!) has been such a sudden one its had a hugely negative impact on my mental health and I actually hate how much it has affected me. I want prepared for how quickly this level of change can happen but it has given me pause to really think about how I treat my body and take as many proactive and positive steps to stay healthy as I can

DownyEmerald · 09/10/2021 09:39
  1. I'd taken looking always younger than my age for granted (slightly smugly). Now I think I look my age ☹️
Jeannie88 · 09/10/2021 09:50

Early 40s I would say. X

crapatthis1 · 09/10/2021 09:54

Definitely 40's, probably 41 and I'm 43 now.
I'm still fighting it but lockdown aged me so much.

emeraldjones · 09/10/2021 09:54

When I cared

sue20 · 09/10/2021 10:09

Gosh you are young! What am I doing on here?

sue20 · 09/10/2021 10:10

@sue20

Gosh you are young! What am I doing on here?
ALL young.
ElFire · 09/10/2021 10:14

@ParkheadParadise so very sorry Flowers

user1471538283 · 09/10/2021 10:21

About 53 I think. The stress of moving house twice, horrendous neighbors, the pandemic and age have really taken their toll. I'm on a diet, exercising and I'm determined to at least shift some weight.

Blossomtoes · 09/10/2021 10:21

61, the year both my parents died. I aged ten years that year, I was looking pretty good up to that point. But my bloke’s four years younger than me but everyone thinks he’s the eldest so I can’t look that bad, I guess.

DurhamDurham · 09/10/2021 10:36

51. I'd taken looking always younger than my age for granted (slightly smugly). Now I think I look my age ☹️

Im 51 too and feel exactly the same. People often assumed I was younger than my actual age until this year. Suddenly it seems people do realise when I'm out with my granddaughter that I'm her grandma when previously they assumed she was my daughter and I corrected them.
Ive gone a bit jowly, a bit wrinkly around the eyes, skin looks a bit thin. On top of all that my hair is either greasy or dry, no in between at all.

I'm finding it difficult, I never walked around thinking I was v attractive but I did walk around knowing I looked younger than I was. It shouldn't matter but it does.

Billandben444 · 09/10/2021 10:38

At 65 I noticed that wrinkles didn't spring back like they used to and I got a bit achey. I've always blonded my hair so grey doesn't show and people say I pass for mid 50s. My mum was quite youthful looking so I think a lot of it is genetic tbh.

WhatWouldTheDoctorDo · 09/10/2021 10:40

Mid-40s. Crepey neck is the worse thing for me. People always used to think I looked much younger than my age, but no-one says that any more... I lost a fair bit of weight around the same time, which was great for my shape, but not so much my face!

takemetomars · 09/10/2021 11:21
  1. Put on weight at the start of the pandemic. Now 55 and looking every bit of it. Never been vain and don't really care much
havesomepatience · 09/10/2021 12:03

I would say 40, first you need glasses or longer arms, then your teeth start collecting anything you eat, your hair starts getting white strands and you find it increasingly difficult to get up off the floor without holding on to something. I am 71 now and I dont feel a day over 40 (until I look in the mirror and see my mum looking back at me). My husband is 68 and he doesnt have an old man smell, he is just a grumpy old git.

Tigerlilynuj · 09/10/2021 12:50

I started to notice the first signs around age 35 and notice more and more each year. More creepy around the eyes at 42 and starting to get a resting bitch face. I have now invested in Botox for my forehead and frown lines. I'm starting to notice the area around my mouth now as my face is less full as it used to be. I'll be holding off on fillers for the foreseeable but won't completely rule it out for the future.

MummBraTheEverLeaking · 09/10/2021 13:20

I'm 42. At 41 my eye wrinkles were awful, in general my skin was good but the crepey eye wrinkles aged me like nothing else. Tried serums, moisturisers, retinoids (bar retin-A) nothing worked so bit the bullet, did my research and got botox. It lasted around 4 months and only in the last week or 2 I can tell it's worn off so am going back in a couple of weeks. I know it's not for everyone and I thought long and hard before getting it done.

In the last few months I can see the beginning of jowls coming which sucks. One thing I won't mind is if my arse gets flatter, even if it goes south! I know a tiny waist and a huge sticking out bum is the fashion now, but not for me! Years of clothes not fitting right, always conscious of it, thinking you look ok in the mirror then all you can see in photos is arse. It got flatter after childbirth weirdly, which was fantastic, but back with a vengeance now.

Emberino · 09/10/2021 16:56

It’s not vain. I think the pandemic hasn’t helped, I’m 52 in a few days and suddenly began to feel crap about a year ago. I changed my moisturiser to one aimed at menopausal women … that helped a bit, but have no idea what to do with my hair. I think it’s normal I felt similar after I had my children late.

Mirw · 09/10/2021 18:16
  1. My gran and my oldest friend didn't start looking older until they were 85. My Mum started at 80 but only due to her dementia. It comes down to what you eat, drink and your genes. If you smoke you can look ancient at 40!!