Anyone else feel fed up about finances and living situation?

[Benjaminbutton12]

I am 31 and live with my partner. We live in a small rented studio flat, which has our living room, kitchen and bedroom in one room, then a small bathroom tacked on.
The inside is nice enough but it’s far too small for two, a lot of our stuff is still in bags as we just don’t have the space. We moved here just after Christmas as it was with the same agency I had previously been with, and it was faster and cheaper than starting again.

We pay £800 per month including all bills and council tax, and I guess we’re being ripped off.

I know we need to move ASAP and just feel down. Most people our age now seem to own nice houses and all seem to have a ‘spare room’ they’ve offered us to stay in. We don’t even have anywhere for guests to sit. I shouldn’t care what people think but I do feel some pressure.
We’re in the North West.

I don’t drive, I commute by bike or public transport and that’s another issue I feel down about. Again, most acquaintances of our age or younger seem to have pretty decent cars now. I can’t afford driving lessons plus a deposit for a home. My partner doesn’t drive either.

I have a degree and a qualification in a ‘professional’ career. I believe it was the wrong career choice for me, teaching, my behaviour management skills were very poor. I look young for my age and don’t think I was taken seriously by the children.
I work in social care, a career which I really enjoy but I earn £9.30 an hour. My partner earns slightly less in kitchen work. I shouldn’t do but I feel embarrassed and that people will judge me for being degree and PGCE-qualified but then going on to be a carer. Some people have made comments, even though it’s a rewarding career, but I will never make a lot of money from it.

This month has been a struggle. We’re paid four weekly, due to the date I started I was paid for 3 weeks, and despite me stating that this was my main job I was put on BR tax code and therefore taxed too much. I came out with £930 net whereas it should have been almost £400 more.

I get paid again on Friday but it’s been a struggle.
Sorry for the long rant, not sure what it’s going to achieve. I just feel stressed and down a lot of the time, and like I ‘should’ be in a better position by my age.
I don’t see a solution other than ‘get a well-paid job’?

But £800 pm including all bills is quite low between 2 of you

By this I mean you should have quite a lot leftover to save a good chunk each month towards a deposit to buy. Are you actually saving and have you both got Help to Buy accounts?

Probably also a good idea to ruthlessly analyse your budgets to see where your money is going and whether you are actually saving what you should be able to.

£400 per month each for all bills? Yes that's very cheap. If you both take home £1300 a month there is no reason why you can't rent somewhere bigger? You'll just have less disposable income??

Would you think about moving somewhere more remote? I know our care home is crying out for staff, and that our council has immediate let’s for people moving here for work as sadly people are usually leaving as they want the ease of city life…my neighbours are both in minimum wage jobs and I know their large 3 bed is £400pm, a private let in town would be £700 for 3 bed. It’s a different way of life, beaches and forests rather than shops and traffic, but it means being poor doesn’t seem quite so grim. Research areas like this maybe? Also, comparison is the thief of joy it really is, you should be proud of being brave enough to leave teaching when you realised it wasn’t right, and social care is a vital and extremely meaningful job. Be proud!

*lets

Op, money is the trade off between doing something you love vs doing something just as a job. Some people are very lucky to be paid well doing what they love.
The question is, would you be willing to re-train in another field for 6months to improve your financial situation? I recommend IT. It’s going to be a lot of hard work, but in 6 months you’ll be earning significantly more.

Look up Salesforce and Cybersecurity. Both are hot right now.

Business analysis and testing pay decently too.

I just wanted to say how sorry I am for you. You are working hard in a noble profession but your general quality of life does sound tough. I really hope one of you finds a way of upping your income so that you can rent a bigger place and enjoy some small luxuries.

Have you looked at:
Hospital work, health care assistant, clinical support worker or nursing associate apprenticeship?

Look at training to become a trainer in care.

See if there are any complex care jobs. They are generally better paid.

Being a personal assistant via your local council should pay around 9.55 an hour, and you can set your hours, choose who you work with.

Good luck. Sounds like you've just got in a bit of a life rut.

OP if you work in social care and enjoy the work, would there be scope to work directly for a small number of clients? I think some people source the care they need in this way.

Or would overnight work in a care home pay better?

Don't feel embarrassed about the work. It's a very important vital service, and if anyone looks down on you for it, their opinion isn't worth taking any notice of.

Adult Ed is a good idea for EFL / ESOL. Lots of work around at the moment........ Contact your local colleges with your interest.

If you feel intimidated in a classroom then definitely do not become a social worker or nurse!
OP work with what you have, you have excellent qualifications. You just need to market yourself better, there is a great demand for tutors at the moment. As others suggested, you could get a job easily within special education.

@BarbaraofSeville

Money wise it will feel a lot better once you get your full salary.

Plus your DP should exploit the current shortage in hospitality by getting the best pay and conditions he can. Then between you, you will have a fairly decent income each month and if you're not running cars your essential expenses are low.

Then your choice is to either stay where you are and save hard so you can afford to buy sooner or move somewhere bigger where it's a bit more comfortable because obviously 2 people in a studio is cosy to say the least.

But £800 pm including all bills is quite low between 2 of you. If you moved to a one bed flat, you'd probably need to add around £250 pm minimum for council tax, water, utilities, possibly broadband?

You can find 2 bed or 600 with good links (depending on council tax, it may be just bit over 800). But tbh even 1bed would make massive difference. And they can be dound for less.

I am with you on DP moving onto better wage. I know kitchen porters now on 11 an hour.

I was in a similar position many years ago ( but do not have a PGCE)
I rented room in shared properties, but drove a car
I worked 1x FT day time job
I worked 2x PT jobs
I worked 6 days a week
I saved up for a deposit
I then got 1x better paying job
Home purchased

If you enjoy the care work and are educated to degree level could you look into private caring. My Dad uses a private carer and she is fab. She gets her clients from word of mouth and reputation.

She charges a similar hourly rate to the agencies (£24 per hr) but as there is no agency that all goes to her. She will have extra costs that go with being self employed such as tax, accountancy and complying with regulations but I think it would be worth looking into if you enjoy this work.

I know 2 people that provide private lessons

One teaches English in a European country (they speak several languages)

One teaches maths on a one to one basis

@kinzarose

If you feel intimidated in a classroom then definitely do not become a social worker or nurse! OP work with what you have, you have excellent qualifications. You just need to market yourself better, there is a great demand for tutors at the moment. As others suggested, you could get a job easily within special education.

I'm a social worker and I completely disagree with this. I'm a social worker because that's where my skills and interests lie, I would be a reasonable secondary school teacher and a crap primary school teacher.

There is a world of difference between teaching children and dealing with adults (which is what most social work is ultimately about).

If the OP enjoys care work then she is exactly the kind of person who would be suited to social work. Someone with a knowledge of care work would e.g. be invaluable in a team doing hospital discharge, short term assessments for adults etc.

Another thing to consider OP is occupational therapy, it's a bit more hands on than social work.

One of life's lessons that I learnt

Is that you have to help yourself !

Nobody is going to wave a magic wand & provide you with a better paid job, a better home, a better life
The reality is that we all make decisions & that life is hard

Perhaps you need to move area & job ?

Id prefer to have a bit more liquidity, but at the same time, it's a great cause, so unless it's inheritance or lotto win, then yea. Make do with what I have.

£400 each inc council tax and bills sounds okay - if you’re not earning enough to have a reasonable quality of life it’s up to you to make changes.
There are other jobs that give you satisfaction from caring for people - what about social work or mental health nursing? Even lower grade NHS care jobs may pay better and give you a pension.

Caring is a very admirable career choice but isn't well paid. I left school at 16 and really thought about what I wanted to do and very carefully selected my career path. I'm in my mid 30s now and earn around double the national average wage (with no further education, only a 3-month vocational course). I think changing careers will help you enormously, and also build your confidence.

Caring is a complete waste of a life - yours - the money is rubbish and there is no career progression and your body will be wrecked in a few years. It is relentless.
You need to go and do your nursing or allied health professions training.
I've done it myself and my back was ruined permanently so I trained to be an NHS podiatrist which I love and i can sit down all day which suits my injuries.

Yes really sick of paying extortionate rent every month for a poky flat with no garden when I could easily afford a mortgage but can't get one. It's soul destroying.

Have you thought about going back to teaching but in a different type of school. I was a ta in a school for severely disabled children so there wasn't much behaviour management it was a very calm and relaxed atmosphere and also had the care element to it too.

I'd definitely look into tutoring. It's a constant ask on my local Facebook page. Once you get going, you'll be recommended & so on. Good luck with everything.

Bit of an out there suggestion - but have you considered moving to London?

You could live in a bedsit/studio for the same money, but London Living Wage is £10.85/hour vs your £9.30/hour and the travel situation here is much better for someone who doesn't drive. Sometimes cheaper than the rest of the country (no, really) and definitely more connections and quicker.

A Wayfarer ticket in Greater Manchester is £14.70.

A peak cap for, say, zones 1 to 4, is £10.60.