to be really annoyed at my partner for cutting our 13 month old's hair?

[somewhereonplanetearth]

Our 13 month old son had beautiful curls. He got lots of compliments on them and I loved running my fingers through to them.

My partner always said if we cut his hair it can grow back stronger and it would be easier for us to massage his head with coconut oil to get rid of the dry skin.

I agreed that my partner could take him for a hair cut, but I told him not to cut it too short.

He then came back like this. Before and after picture is attached.

I'm really sad and angry at my partner 😭

Even my mother says he looks poorly like that, like a sick child.

AIBU?

Wow, I’d be totally furious if DH did this. My 2 year old also has lovely bouncing curls, I cut the back and sides but leave the top lovely and curly. It isn’t true about them growing back stronger, you may find it grows back straight I’m afraid.

[quote RussianSpy101]@BeingATwatItsABingThing I don’t work with children, no.[/quote]
That’s ok then.

Well, no baby hair doesn't grow back the same - it grows thicker and heavier so the bubbly curls are gone forever.
I feel sad and annoyed for you OP.

Seriously? Sad and annoyed because dad got his own child's hair cut a bit shorter than mum would have liked?

It's such a non issue.

I’d be pissed off tbh, given that he didn’t listen to your request. Bit insensitive to compare his look to a sick child though. It will Grow back but I’d be upset too.

Well, there's "a bit shorter" and there's "almost entirely shaved off". OP said the child could have a haircut as long as it wasn't too short. The kids come back with practically no hair. The only thing shorter than that would be bald. So the father has gone against her wishes. I can see why her request being completely ignored would annoy her.

Next time take him yourself OP. And notify him that the hair coming back stronger and thicker after a cut is a myth and old wives tale. The ends are just blunter.

I don't think you're being unreasonable OP - apart from the bit where you think he looks sick. He doesn't. I just don't think you were on the same page with what 'too short' means.

Hair does grow back yes, but the curls might not return - you'll just have to wait and see.

If he has dry skin as you mention, then it's easier to treat it with less hair. Crack on with getting that sorted while his hair is short, and it will then grow back pretty quickly anyway.

It looks fine and for the practical reasons of rubbing cream into his head that's going to be much better short so an improvement in his skin and a more comfortable little boy.
Can't see why you are upset,surely his welfare comes before you enjoying his curls?

It'll grow back. There are more important things in life to worry about.

Ugh small boys with long hair looks hideous! My ex-SIL (who is a hairdresser of all things!) let her young son's hair grow really really long to the point my parents (who have only met him once) were sure SIL had a daughter

Trying to get a kid that age to sit still for a haircut can be a nightmare!

Took DS when he was about that age with the intention of short back and sides and because of his crying and moving one side was too high that so we just shaved the lot off. And continued to do that until he sat nicely for it to be done.

It will grow back again, no point in falling out over it.

I’m sorry - indulge your upset for half an hour then put your big girls knickers on and let it go.

It’s hair. It’ll grow back. He doesn’t care, he never will - and in a couple of months you won’t either. Especially if you’ve been able to cure the cradle cap.

And he doesn’t look ‘poorly’ he looks like a child that has had a haircut. Being so dramatic does no one any good.

@XelaM

Ugh small boys with long hair looks hideous! My ex-SIL (who is a hairdresser of all things!) let her young son's hair grow really really long to the point my parents (who have only met him once) were sure SIL had a daughter

How rude And why does it matter if the boy looks like a girl? Such hideously entrenched views.

He’s your partner’s child too (I presume) Doesn’t he get a say in your child’s hair style or do you always dictate everything?

Ugh small boys with long hair looks hideous! My ex-SIL (who is a hairdresser of all things!) let her young son's hair grow really really long to the point my parents (who have only met him once) were sure SIL had a daughter

Is that a problem? It's just another way that boys and girls look similar at that age. There's no need to differentiate between the sexes anyway so who cares if someone thought a boy was a girl? It's a good thing. Much better for them just to be themselves.

One of my pet hates is boys with long hair. I know that IABU though

Aw he just looks like his hair started to grow in a little later as far as I can tell. DS looked just like that at around 9 months as his long baby hair fell out and he sprouted blond in a perfect crew cut style halo.
I'd think he's little enough the baby curls will grown back in too.