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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder what on God's green Earth possessed my 'D'H

341 replies

Lagomtransplant · 23/09/2021 22:01

So we're having a nice quiet evening, winding down towards bedtime. Suddenly my DH jumps up as if bitten by a flea, walks over to the hallway and starts fiddling with the newly purchased photo shelf. I ask him to leave it be, as I'm tired, and we'll sort it over the weekend.

Nope, on he goes about the waterpipes. OK, I kind of get that, it doesn't matter, if it can't go, the shelf is only a fiver, I'll put it into a charity box or something. No, suddenly I have to come over and give my opinion on the various positions on the wall. I give up and go back to my cuppa.

Next thing I turn around and he's eyeing the radiator suspiciously. I TELL him, beg and plead with him to leave it alone. No, off the wall it comes and apparently it is SOOO heavy I ABSOLUTELY MUST come over and help him put it back up. For the sake of clarity, this is a bog standard small radiator that CANNOT weigh more than a stone if that. I lift it during seasonal big clean with ease and put it back.

Now he's screaming the house down that I must come and help him. I put my foot down, I told him not to mess with it, now put it back up and stop being a crybaby. He goes on about having to call his elderly dad over to help him put the sodding thing back up. I tell him to pack it in.

Next thing he's on the floor, writhing like a bug, claiming the radiator fell over him. I told him I'm not having any of it, put the radiator back and stop being a fool. All of a sudden, he drags the slipper basket over, puts the radiator on it and starts following me around the house saying he's got horrible cramps and what am I going to do about it.

By this time I am royally passed off by his behaviour. I told him to pack it in, this time using some phrases I'm not going to repeat here. So he stomps off, puts the radiator back on (Suddenly it's not that heavy after all Hmm ) and cue more screaming. I simply eyeroll as he barges into the kitchen carrying a pebble sized piece of plaster, claiming I made him break the wall down.

Now he's off to draw himself a bath to cure his humongous crams that miraculously don't stop him from stomping up and down the stairs. Apparently I'm the most selfish person alive.

I'm sitting down, trying to cool down and wondering what Dr Who monster possessed my husband tonight, as this is utterly out of character for him. I am considering making him think over his behaviour on the sofa tonight.

So AIBU to have put my foot down and demanded he cleaned up the mess of his own making???

OP posts:
butterpuffed · 24/09/2021 08:17

OP sounds irritated/annoyed with her DH but as it's never happened before , I'd be on the phone to the GP.

JamieNorthlife · 24/09/2021 08:18

@RagzReturnsRebooted

Um, has he had some kind of neurological event or mental breakdown? Don't let him lock himself in the bathroom, just in case. Sudden out of character behaviour can be a red flag.

On a lighter note, it sounds hilarious. Have some wine!

Agree, he needs to get checked at the hospital.
Makinganewthinghappen · 24/09/2021 08:19

I hope you are both ok! If our out of character i would agree he needs to see a doctor!

Jumpingintosummer · 24/09/2021 08:28

I agree with the chorus I’d seek medical advice.

ThePlumVan · 24/09/2021 08:32

Guest share slippers Envy

HangingOver · 24/09/2021 08:37

If it's totally new behaviour I'd be off th the GP. My friend who was suffering psychosis started off by getting random bees in his bonnet out of no where. Like burst of energy where he HAD to do certain protects.

LookItsMeAgain · 24/09/2021 08:39

If it is so out of character for him to behave like he did last night, I would be keeping a close eye on how he is today and possibly seeking medical advice in case there was something more sinister happening here.

Best of luck to you @Lagomtransplant

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 24/09/2021 08:39

I'm also going to recommend he gets checked over by someone medical.
The leukaemia is a potential red flag that it might be something medically related, especially as it came on so suddenly and he behaved so out of character.

I don't think I'd even wait for him to do anything similar again - just get him checked out now.

Ugzbugz · 24/09/2021 08:39

I would have rejoiced in taking the radiator off and on many times to show him what a mouse he's being.

My rads also lift on and off like 2 clips they hook on to

MrsRobbieHart · 24/09/2021 08:41

You both sound painfully melodramatic.

EmeraldShamrock · 24/09/2021 08:43

When my DM had a pulmonary embolism she was acting very weird and out of character in the days before a diagnosis.

Is he still strange today?

ManifestDestinee · 24/09/2021 08:43

@starfishmummy

guest slippers

Euww at putting feet in something other people have had their fungus and verucca ridden feet in.

Not just your dh who is weird.

WTF is wrong with your feet? Sounds like YOU shouldn't share slippers, but most of us have normal clean feet.
Chikapu · 24/09/2021 08:44

@starfishmummy

guest slippers

Euww at putting feet in something other people have had their fungus and verucca ridden feet in.

Not just your dh who is weird.

Are your feet fungus and verruca ridden? Most people's are not.
Ugzbugz · 24/09/2021 08:46

Removable radiator....

To wonder what on God's green Earth possessed my 'D'H
Stormyequine · 24/09/2021 08:47

How does he seem this morning OP. It does all sound very odd. I hope he is OK!

BordelDeMerde · 24/09/2021 08:47

I'd be worried about my DH if he started behaving like that.
I hope you're ok this morning, Op. Have you talked to him? Can he remember what happened last night? If not, I'd get him checked out asap.

Chikapu · 24/09/2021 08:47

Just perfectly normal bloke behaviour if you ask me

Nah, it really isn't. Not one thing about that behaviour is normal.

Mummyoflittledragon · 24/09/2021 08:52

We had those in a house we rented. I didn’t like it as I imagined spiders crawling in and out of the big hole. When we updated our heating, we paid more for fixed pipes.

Anyway I also think you should get your dh checked out. I hope all is ok.

sloutside · 24/09/2021 08:57

OP writes a dramatic and well-written post about her DH suddenly getting a bee in his bonnet about a radiator shelf late at night. This happens, lots of people suddenly need to sort sonething out there and then. OP can't be arsed lifting a radiator late at night. DH is then pissed off with her, possibly pulls a muscle or something and then makes a bit of a drama about it and stomps upstairs. The descriptions are probably exaggerated a bit but it's similar behaviour to so many other DH's in differing scenarios in Mumsnet posts.

But now we have people insisting on him needing medical help and diagnosing a range of conditions from UTIs to psychosis to leukemia and MS.

Very unlikely..... I diagnosis ridiculous toddler-like behaviour and the best thing to do is ignore it, don't give him attention for it.

If there are regular repeated episodes of this then perhaps he might have a medical condition but more likely he's just a tit

toomuchlaundry · 24/09/2021 08:59

I would find it very odd behaviour if DH suddenly acted like that and would be worried about him

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 24/09/2021 09:00

@sloutside - in case you missed it, the OP's DH had leukaemia before, it's not a "snatched from thin air" diagnosis. Hmm

MarieIVanArkleStinks · 24/09/2021 09:02

OP I can see why some people have seen humour in the way you tell the story, but I'd be concerned too. I'm so sorry your husband has had leukaemia, and I hope he's OK and his behaviour isn't the sign of something sinister.

I'm also sorry people have seen fit to pick holes in your thread, take the piss relentlessly out of your living arrangements and mock your use of (perfectly correct) English. I also use the word 'hiney', which I think harks back to my time living in the States! Full Mumsnet house goes to the poster claiming you are thriving on drama; there's always one on every thread.

Kudos to you for responding to all this with unruffled good humour. Talking of humour, I don't generally walk around with a po-face and a stick up my arse, but my humour isn't the brand (at someone else's expense) we're mainly seeing on this thread. I don't see why people have to be so needlessly rude. I'm embarrassed for them.

💐 for OP.

FreyaonFire · 24/09/2021 09:04

Lovemusic33 -
I’m not sure why so many people are laughing and joking about this. It sounds like OP’s dh is unwell. Either some kind of breakdown, a mini stroke or maybe some kind of infection. An infection such as a UTI can cause weird symptoms and psychosis. Where are the cramps he is having? I would be getting him checked over by your GP as something doesn’t seem right (unless this happens a lot?).

This. My very first thought was that he might have had a mini stroke. If this is extremely unusual behaviour for him, and he's never acted like this before, he might well have had a mini stroke. It can make you very disoriented, confused and irrational - I've seen it happen to a close family member. I'd get it checked out.

And your English is perfect by the way. Hoppas att allt löser sig.

HoppingPavlova · 24/09/2021 09:06

His behaviour is not normal. I would not have engaged, just would have gone to bed and left him to whatever pantomime he was putting on minus the audience.

No way in hell would I be putting slippers that someone else had used into my feet. Wouldn’t care less that they were washed and esp at 40deg. I’m happy to be barefoot but to be frank not sure how that helps as I live pretty much barefoot so my feet would probably make your floors dirty Grin, but if you came at me with a pair of used slippers that were not sealed in original packaging I would think you had gone quite mad.

sashh · 24/09/2021 09:10

Hang on.

Are you in Sweden?

Is one of you Swedish?

Why don't the ILs bring their own slippers?

Sorry I see you said you are Swedish.

How is he this morning?

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