To wonder what on God's green Earth possessed my 'D'H

[Lagomtransplant]

So we're having a nice quiet evening, winding down towards bedtime. Suddenly my DH jumps up as if bitten by a flea, walks over to the hallway and starts fiddling with the newly purchased photo shelf. I ask him to leave it be, as I'm tired, and we'll sort it over the weekend.

Nope, on he goes about the waterpipes. OK, I kind of get that, it doesn't matter, if it can't go, the shelf is only a fiver, I'll put it into a charity box or something. No, suddenly I have to come over and give my opinion on the various positions on the wall. I give up and go back to my cuppa.

Next thing I turn around and he's eyeing the radiator suspiciously. I TELL him, beg and plead with him to leave it alone. No, off the wall it comes and apparently it is SOOO heavy I ABSOLUTELY MUST come over and help him put it back up. For the sake of clarity, this is a bog standard small radiator that CANNOT weigh more than a stone if that. I lift it during seasonal big clean with ease and put it back.

Now he's screaming the house down that I must come and help him. I put my foot down, I told him not to mess with it, now put it back up and stop being a crybaby. He goes on about having to call his elderly dad over to help him put the sodding thing back up. I tell him to pack it in.

Next thing he's on the floor, writhing like a bug, claiming the radiator fell over him. I told him I'm not having any of it, put the radiator back and stop being a fool. All of a sudden, he drags the slipper basket over, puts the radiator on it and starts following me around the house saying he's got horrible cramps and what am I going to do about it.

By this time I am royally passed off by his behaviour. I told him to pack it in, this time using some phrases I'm not going to repeat here. So he stomps off, puts the radiator back on (Suddenly it's not that heavy after all ) and cue more screaming. I simply eyeroll as he barges into the kitchen carrying a pebble sized piece of plaster, claiming I made him break the wall down.

Now he's off to draw himself a bath to cure his humongous crams that miraculously don't stop him from stomping up and down the stairs. Apparently I'm the most selfish person alive.

I'm sitting down, trying to cool down and wondering what Dr Who monster possessed my husband tonight, as this is utterly out of character for him. I am considering making him think over his behaviour on the sofa tonight.

So AIBU to have put my foot down and demanded he cleaned up the mess of his own making???

@HoppingPavlova I'm assuming you've never gone bowling and hired the bowling shoes that thousands of people have worn?

Don't think I've ever seen so many posters pick apart an OPs thread and writing style ever!!

How is your dh this morning op? Sudden strange behaviour would make me think of
-drugs
-copying tiktok videos that show pranking / partner
-a medical reason for delirium, like uti or covid
-he wanted to annoy you

Even though his behaviour was at the extreme end, I suspect his ‘attention seeking bee in a bonnet’ behaviour is not that unusual for him.

I would lose respect for a grown man acting like an over tired toddler.

Now can we please move on from the radiator (which has a flexible pipe coming out of the wall, which is why it can come off without having to drain it, like in any persimmon house to my knowledge)

Ours do the same, it’s standard in most new builds now. It is so handy!

How is he his morning? Has he noted how out of character it was?

this thread has really cheered up my morning, fantastic.

Is DH a normal man this morning or still an upside bug?

@Lagomtransplant -- I knew someone years ago whose husband became psychotic quite suddenly. His company were closing his place of work and offering transfers to another workplace further away, he was igetting on a bit and got super worried about all the changes and his chances, and just broke down. He behaved very erratically and in the end was committed to a hospital for a bit. What I remember is that when he was getting better and came home for visits she told a story of how he just suddenly insisted that he had to eat ostbågar with a fork - but it was very funny, they were all laughing about it together as a family. He's fine now afaik, just aware that he's more fragile. I don't know if you could get him checked out? I had a male relative who suffered a series of small strokes once and behaved very very strangely for a bit too, pouring wine on his plate and other small oddities.

Du låter för övrigt helt rationell och normal och uttrycker dig inte ett skvatt märkligt tycker jag.

Can't believe slipper baskets are baffling people. It's hardly a concept that can't be worked out from context or worthy of derailment? It's not like "so I put down the live mice I was breeding for our Sunday dinners" - that's a baffling statement.

@HoppingPavlova I'm assuming you've never gone bowling and hired the bowling shoes that thousands of people have worn?

Absolutely correct.

@FreyaonFire

Lovemusic33 - I’m not sure why so many people are laughing and joking about this. It sounds like OP’s dh is unwell. Either some kind of breakdown, a mini stroke or maybe some kind of infection. An infection such as a UTI can cause weird symptoms and psychosis. Where are the cramps he is having? I would be getting him checked over by your GP as something doesn’t seem right (unless this happens a lot?).

This. My very first thought was that he might have had a mini stroke. If this is extremely unusual behaviour for him, and he's never acted like this before, he might well have had a mini stroke. It can make you very disoriented, confused and irrational - I've seen it happen to a close family member. I'd get it checked out.

And your English is perfect by the way. Hoppas att allt löser sig.

I agree with you, my first thought was that Op's husband was unwell and needed to go to a Hospital asap.

Not sure why slipper baskets are such a weird concept? I don't have one, but several friends (all from Central Europe or East Asia) do.

And the radiators sound genius, I want those in my house!

OP, how is he this morning? If he has no memory of the incident, for example, I'd be worried. Otherwise I'd keep an eye on it and see how he is generally.

My god Mumsnet really has reached a new low.

Sounds like your DH wanting your attention, then moving on to the radiator to-I don't know-establish dominance/autonomy/spite you, then hurting himself and getting into a temper. Snowball effect because he was tired?

Disclaimer: I am a woman with ADHD and have had hypomanic episodes before. I work in mental health.

This sounds a lot like the kind of thing I do when I feel restless. I can literally stop in the middle of watching a movie and leap up to do something my brain has convinced me is drastically important (fixing something trivial that's been broken for weeks, searching for a trinket I lost years ago, etc.). If it's so intense that I end up "hyperfocusing" on that task, then nothing can convince me to leave it alone.

It's also something I do if I'm feeling very anxious about something in particular - I project it onto a meaningless external problem. When this happens, I can come across as very snappy with people because I'm trying to "communicate" that I'm feeling vulnerable and need support, but via a completely bewildering display of bullshit that nobody understands!

Of course, I'm also a mature adult who has learned that my actions affect other people, and as such I hold myself accountable for upsetting people around me with my bullshit, and apologise/fix things accordingly. Your DP should too.

I really think I need a slipper basket now!

On the actual thread, I can see this is out of character for your DH but my exh used to behave that way all the time. Doing things I’ve said don’t need to be done now and wanting me to come and pay attention to his priorities.

It does sound weird, and as it's completely out of character I agree with PP's about keeping an eye on him, as it could be a sign of serious health issues.

What slippers do you put in your slipper basket then? None of ours are bung in the wash types. I'm tempted to do this as we have a cold house but need more information.

how do you take the radiator off without water going everywhere? I'm not reading 9 pages of this so if it's already been said could someone could please tell me?

@Lagomtransplant,
Your post is wrote very well , ignor people that say it's phrased strangely.

Removable rad's are deffenetly a thing in the UK too.

I would be concerned about the sudden change in your DH's behaviour, I don't want to scare you but my DM started doing odd things every now and then , like lying all the tinned food on its side in the cupboard, arranging all the household cleaning products on the worktop in a set way because they look pretty like that filling bath and sink to the very top to save water (tbf it wasn't usual for the water supply to be a issue when we were very young so I can see some logic in that )
Plus other odd things like getting very melancholy / cross/ hysterical for no reason.
She like a drink very now and then so we just put it down to that untill one day v early in the morning she decided that all doors were wrong and tried to take them off cupboards, bedrooms , front and back door.
My DD took her to the gp, who referee her yo hospital right away.
She had been having mini strokes for quite some time , the electrons misfiring in her brain was what caused the odd behaviour.

This may not be the case with your DH ( and certainly hope it's not ) but it really is worth him seeing his GP or ring 111 if you have a simalar service in Sweden.

[quote AlCalavicci]@Lagomtransplant,
Your post is wrote very well , ignor people that say it's phrased strangely.

Removable rad's are deffenetly a thing in the UK too.

I would be concerned about the sudden change in your DH's behaviour, I don't want to scare you but my DM started doing odd things every now and then , like lying all the tinned food on its side in the cupboard, arranging all the household cleaning products on the worktop in a set way because they look pretty like that filling bath and sink to the very top to save water (tbf it wasn't usual for the water supply to be a issue when we were very young so I can see some logic in that )
Plus other odd things like getting very melancholy / cross/ hysterical for no reason.
She like a drink very now and then so we just put it down to that untill one day v early in the morning she decided that all doors were wrong and tried to take them off cupboards, bedrooms , front and back door.
My DD took her to the gp, who referee her yo hospital right away.
She had been having mini strokes for quite some time , the electrons misfiring in her brain was what caused the odd behaviour.

This may not be the case with your DH ( and certainly hope it's not ) but it really is worth him seeing his GP or ring 111 if you have a simalar service in Sweden.[/quote]
Same experience with my husband, random weird behaviour, a couple of falls that could be explained away, took a year, he was having multiple small bleeds on the brain, before the last one killed him. We only found out after the PM and suddenly every thing fell into place.

He was being seen by the doctor and being treated for depression, because "he's bought a new suit" isn't a very helpful diagnostic symptom.

@MarieIVanArkleStinks

OP I can see why some people have seen humour in the way you tell the story, but I'd be concerned too. I'm so sorry your husband has had leukaemia, and I hope he's OK and his behaviour isn't the sign of something sinister.

I'm also sorry people have seen fit to pick holes in your thread, take the piss relentlessly out of your living arrangements and mock your use of (perfectly correct) English. I also use the word 'hiney', which I think harks back to my time living in the States! Full Mumsnet house goes to the poster claiming you are thriving on drama; there's always one on every thread.

Kudos to you for responding to all this with unruffled good humour. Talking of humour, I don't generally walk around with a po-face and a stick up my arse, but my humour isn't the brand (at someone else's expense) we're mainly seeing on this thread. I don't see why people have to be so needlessly rude. I'm embarrassed for them.

💐 for OP.

Not quite a Full Mumsnet House... we've had the shouts of "LTB", bun-fights over trivial aspects of domestic hygiene, the spurious medical claims, and the linguistic snobbery, but we've yet to have someone claim the OP is "tone-deaf" or "showing off" for living in a house with detachable radiators and photo shelves while some people can't afford them.

Hope he's OK - this isn't normal behaviour. Hopefully it was just a fit of pique and he's sulking, and nothing more sinister. Definitely worth a phone appointment with a GP, though, I'd have thought. Best of luck OP

Wtf did I just read...

All the confused and strange behaviour with a UTI has been in older people (60+). I’ve not come across young people with UTIs being like this. They just tend to feel like they’re peeing razor blades and are generally unwell.

I can't help thinking there's more to it than you are saying?

@woopdedoodle,
So sorry to hear your DH did not get the right diagnosis soon enough , my DM's odd behaviour went on for around 6 /8 months ones every 4/5 weeks so it was easy for us to brush off as just been a big odd.
When my DD managed to get her treated the docs said it could of been going on for years without our knowledge.
Strokes are not already easy to diagnose / spot as some people seem to think.

@Badgercity

Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

Ok maybe I misread the tone of OPs original post and apologies if so. I took it as a tongue in cheek description of OPs increasing annoyance at DH, rather than concern for his physical and or mental health.

OP if you’re seriously worried that something’s not right, other than DH just being a dick, then as others have said, get him to the doc.