Drinking in pregnancy

[PurplePizzaCake]

AIBU in thinking it's OK to have the odd glass of wine while pregnant? Maybe 2 very small glasses a week?

Yes = YABU and shouldn't drink that much/anything at all

No= it's fine to have the odd glass

Urgh, you're horrible

Bit rich, you’re the one reducing a woman to nothing more than the foetus she is carrying.

@Glssr195726113493

Urgh, you're horrible

Bit rich, you’re the one reducing a woman to nothing more than the foetus she is carrying.

Hardly.

It's 9 months. It's called compromise for what is a presumably wanted pregnancy.

@arield company I use what? Happiness? OP is doing nothing wrong having the odd drink

*compromise

It's 9 months. It's called compromise for what is a presumably wanted pregnancy

You didn't

I really hate this nonsense. Can women not see that by casting ideas and aspersions regarding other women's behaviour during pregnancy, it's a very short step to forcibly making women behave in certain ways?

It's not so far from seeing women as gestators, breeding machines, because the foetus is more important than the pregnant woman.

The argument around substance use during pregnancy is secondary really to the principle that women have and should have absolute volition over their bodies. It's unfortunate that some women choose to abuse substances during pregnancy, I'd rather they did that though than have a cohort of absolute monsters tell women what they can or cannot do with their lives ,bodies or sexuality.

Fuck that and fuck them.

@ShrikeAttack

I really hate this nonsense. Can women not see that by casting ideas and aspersions regarding other women's behaviour during pregnancy, it's a very short step to forcibly making women behave in certain ways?

It's not so far from seeing women as gestators, breeding machines, because the foetus is more important than the pregnant woman.

The argument around substance use during pregnancy is secondary really to the principle that women have and should have absolute volition over their bodies. It's unfortunate that some women choose to abuse substances during pregnancy, I'd rather they did that though than have a cohort of absolute monsters tell women what they can or cannot do with their lives ,bodies or sexuality.

Fuck that and fuck them.

Hmm... Heavy (or tbh even moderate) drinking when pregnant shouldn't be seen as a benign lifestyle choice and it's not fair to inflict problems like FAS onto a child and expect zero condemnation or criticism. Especially if the mother refuses help

However, some posters on here are totally ridiculous. Drinking a small amount irregularly is not blameworthy.

But I would say knowingly harming your fetus - who will be born and grow into a real child - is not a good choice. Nobody can physically stop the woman but I wouldn't stand by a choice like that

Being a woman can't just be used as a cop out for everything unfortunately. Light, sensible drinking is fine though.

Everyone from my mum's generation drank in moderation, where are all these people suffering the effects of FAS? Hell, my mum was advised to drink mackeson's stout - not to get drunk, but half a pint every day 'for the iron'. All three of us kids are straight A students - why have we not suffered from FAS?

It's not the point though @sweetieqie. It's not up to you, or me, or any other fucker to have any opinion at all about how any woman conducts herself during pregnancy. If we live in a society where women are considered individuals who happen to be pregnant, which is how it should be, the rest is completely irrelevant to anyone else.

Any judgement on any pregnant woman's behaviour is the first step to legislation that compels women to behave in certain ways because the foetus is seen as more important than the woman carrying it. And when drilled down to any logic makes no sense at all.

@Thevoiceofreason2021

What does your partner think? It’s not just about you. What about the baby? I didn’t drink when pregnant and to be honest have only had about 3 glasses of wine since she was born 2 years ago and I used to love a bevvy. But life changes when you have a kid… I think you are in for a bit of a shock, you’ll be making bigger sacrifices than wine, get used to it

My partner is 100% in agreement with me and actively offers me a small glass if he's opening a bottle.

Plus I am already a mother of a toddler, so not sure it will be toouch of a shock having another

@ShrikeAttack

I really hate this nonsense. Can women not see that by casting ideas and aspersions regarding other women's behaviour during pregnancy, it's a very short step to forcibly making women behave in certain ways?

It's not so far from seeing women as gestators, breeding machines, because the foetus is more important than the pregnant woman.

The argument around substance use during pregnancy is secondary really to the principle that women have and should have absolute volition over their bodies. It's unfortunate that some women choose to abuse substances during pregnancy, I'd rather they did that though than have a cohort of absolute monsters tell women what they can or cannot do with their lives ,bodies or sexuality.

Fuck that and fuck them.

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

@Noodella18

Everyone from my mum's generation drank in moderation, where are all these people suffering the effects of FAS? Hell, my mum was advised to drink mackeson's stout - not to get drunk, but half a pint every day 'for the iron'. All three of us kids are straight A students - why have we not suffered from FAS?

I really wish someone would answer this

I have 5 children and I had a few glasses occasionally through all pregnancies. With my eldest, the advice was one or two units once or twice a week ... she isn't part of a generation of FAS kids either!

Agree with PPs you should do some research to help you make an informed decision. For example, I read Emily Oster’s Expecting Better - really recommend it- which helped me understand what choices to make re food and drink during pregnancy. I had a small glass of something just on special occasions; maybe four or five instances throughout the 9 months. That was my choice and I felt comfortable with it. Wishing you health and happiness!

@StarkintheSouth what does Emily oster's book actually say about drinking? Lots of people have said it's a great book but I know i won't get around to reading it.

@Noodella18 it's a fantastic book - really well researched.

She says there's a lot of very flawed data - usually because of people also using drugs and because of issues with self reported use. She concludes there's no differences between countries who advocate no drinking in pregnancy when compared to those where drinking in moderation is fine. She also found that it's slightly more complex than the amount you drink because the speed that you drink is also important because of the rate your body metabolises alcohol. But ultimately a few glasses of alcohol a week show no increased rate of side affects associated with FAS with slightly better outcomes for children born to mothers who drank 2-3 glasses a week - although she stresses this is probably either random or can be explained by other things and not that 2-3 glasses a week is preferable to 0 or 1 glass!

@ohfook thanks very much for taking the time to explain al that, very interesting!

My partner will also pour me a glass if I ask, through all my pregnancies. He trusts me to have looked into it and know it’s fine.

YABU. There is no need to drink when pregnant. You are told not to because no one knows the risks so why put your unborn child through the potential harm?
One glass of wine probably doesn’t make you feel drunk so why drink it? If you drink enough to feel drunk then clearly that’s far too much and really risking your babies health.

It’s selfish IMO.

I've never drunk at all until after around 20 weeks. Then had the very occasional glass of fizz.

@Eilatan2018 you do know that it’s ok to drink wine not to get drunk right?
“One glass of wine probably doesn’t make you feel drunk so why drink it?”
Are you looking for a more sophisticated answer than “because she wants to?”

[quote Strokethefurrywall]@Eilatan2018 you do know that it’s ok to drink wine not to get drunk right?
“One glass of wine probably doesn’t make you feel drunk so why drink it?”
Are you looking for a more sophisticated answer than “because she wants to?”[/quote]
So you’ll drink something for the taste that could risk your babies health? Enjoy!

So you’ll drink something for the taste that could risk your babies health?

Okay, are you going to be the one that actually provides data to back this up?

I warn you, it’s been a looong thread and no ones managed it yet.

So you’ll drink something for the taste that could risk your babies health? Enjoy!

Yep, I would because the occasional glass of wine with my dinner wasn’t risking my babies health. But all a moot really given my kids are 10 & 7 and in perfectly wonderful health.