Drinking in pregnancy

[PurplePizzaCake]

AIBU in thinking it's OK to have the odd glass of wine while pregnant? Maybe 2 very small glasses a week?

Yes = YABU and shouldn't drink that much/anything at all

No= it's fine to have the odd glass

Oh for gods sake, 'wanting' a glass of wine isn't a great priority.

Well is it any more/less a priority than wanting cake, chocolate, ice cream, a trip to a clothes shop, seeing friends, etc, etc?

@arield

Not if you enjoy a glass. Which many people do. Remember the woman, the person gestating? Her wants matter too

Oh for gods sake, 'wanting' a glass of wine isn't a great priority.

You can't always get what you want.

But that's the thing, you CAN. You can want a glass of wine, and have a glass of wine, safe in the knowledge that it is not a risk.

Newsflash - men and women are different.

@arield ok what's the difference in men and women that means women can't continue to drink when they have a child but men can? Would really like to know!

@TheKeatingFive

Newsflash - men and women are different.

Well they certainly are when it comes to policing their drinking habits.

Men can't gestate babies.

Maybe it's not said aloud but I'm sure most people judge

I have never seen it expressed on here (apart from on this thread when explicitly drawn to people’s attention). Occasional drinking is commented on all the time, despite the risks being actually smaller.

Men can't gestate babies

@arield so what? That means women can't drink the way she used to after having had a baby but the man can?

Men can't gestate babies.

Well observed.

The original comment was about post childbirth though.

@TheKeatingFive

Oh for gods sake, 'wanting' a glass of wine isn't a great priority.

Well is it any more/less a priority than wanting cake, chocolate, ice cream, a trip to a clothes shop, seeing friends, etc, etc?

A trip to a clothes shop?

What you on about.

On balance, alcohol is deemed more of a risk. Hence the medical warnings.

@YourFinestPantaloons

Newsflash - men and women are different.

@arield ok what's the difference in men and women that means women can't continue to drink when they have a child but men can? Would really like to know!

When they have a child?

We're talking about drinking during pregnancy aren't we? And as far as I'm aware, only women can be pregnant.

@YourFinestPantaloons

Men can't gestate babies

@arield so what? That means women can't drink the way she used to after having had a baby but the man can?

I've literally never said that.

@TheKeatingFive

Men can't gestate babies.

Well observed.

The original comment was about post childbirth though.

Ok fair enough.

A trip to a clothes shop?

Inessential trip in a car. Always the small risk of an RTA and damage to baby.

On balance, alcohol is deemed more of a risk. Hence the medical warnings.

That’s a policy decision not based on any actual evidence though.

Read Ostler’s book, she’s really good on this.

On balance, alcohol is deemed more of a risk. Hence the medical warnings.

Is it? Source please that it's deemed more of a risk than a trip to the shops in a car?

All I want is a link for crying out loud!

Thing is, we don't know what's riskier - but as adult humans we used our own brains to assess risk and we even get to make decision without interference from outsiders about what we consume in pregnancy, where we travel to, how much we weigh. Be grateful for that.

Why take the chance ?
If anything were to go wrong you'd wonder for the rest of your life if it was avoidable.
This excuse of it being easier to take a drink than have people wondering if you're pregnant, well who cares what anyone thinks ?
If you don't make an announcement they can wonder all they like but they won't actual know , or care .

On balance, alcohol is deemed more of a risk. Hence the medical warnings

But it isn't deemed more of a risk. You mixing up science with public health advice.

@arield no that comment was in reference to me saying that men who 'love a bevvy' don't tend to 'only have 2 or 3 beers' since their child was born 2 years ago. That was a comment in response to a smug poster who thought stifling for enjoyment of things is what mothers should be doing.

@FilledSoda

Why take the chance ? If anything were to go wrong you'd wonder for the rest of your life if it was avoidable. This excuse of it being easier to take a drink than have people wondering if you're pregnant, well who cares what anyone thinks ? If you don't make an announcement they can wonder all they like but they won't actual know , or care .

Why take the chance ?If anything were to go wrong you'd wonder for the rest of your life if it was avoidable

You'd have to wonder about all the other risks you took though, and worry about those. Why focus on the one we know is less of a risk than others?

Why take the chance ?

Why take the chance of anything though? Life is full of tiny risks we take everyday.

As I keep pointing out, every time we get in a car there’s a risk. But society has conditioned us to discount this risk while magnifying other, smaller ones:

OP there are hundreds of these threads on MN - I wish people would learn to use the search function.

But in summary. Yes it is fine to have the odd glass of wine.

The reason there isn't a safe limit is because it would be unethical to do a test for it.

And people love to tell pregnant women what to do and act as if they've lost their minds.

If anything were to go wrong you'd wonder for the rest of your life if it was avoidable

I did have the odd drink when I was pregnant, and had there been anything wrong with my son I would have known that it had nothing to do with having the odd glass of wine or extremely lemonaded down Pimms.

@lockdownmadnessdotcom

If anything were to go wrong you'd wonder for the rest of your life if it was avoidable

I did have the odd drink when I was pregnant, and had there been anything wrong with my son I would have known that it had nothing to do with having the odd glass of wine or extremely lemonaded down Pimms.

Same. I REALLY wish people wouldn't push the normality of guilt onto women. I'm sick of being told o should feel guilty about my parenting choices. I never feel guilt, not even when I fuck up

Yabu
I wouldn't call two glasses a week occasional, I would call that regularly drinking. An occasional glass would be two or three glasses for the pregnancy. Two glasses a week is too much when it has been proven by research to affect your child.

Please, please don't. I'm an adopted mum to a child exposed to drugs and alcohol in the womb - the effects of even one exposure incident to alcohol in the womb can be lifelong and leave a child with challenges that could otherwise be avoided. It's not always recognised as Foetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder which is why people are unaware of the risks. It's as dangerous as smoking during pregnancy would be. So I'm begging you - please wait until your child is born.
www.nhs.uk/conditions/foetal-alcohol-syndrome/

@nameisnotimportant

Yabu I wouldn't call two glasses a week occasional, I would call that regularly drinking. An occasional glass would be two or three glasses for the pregnancy. Two glasses a week is too much when it has been proven by research to affect your child.

Source please for that claim @nameisnotimportant

the effects of even one exposure incident to alcohol in the womb can be lifelong and leave a child with challenges that could otherwise be avoided

Source for that please @Drumgley