To think high heels look a bit silly?

[postingfortraffichere]

I'm a sucker for them (or used to be) but the more time goes by I'm starting to feel they have very little place in my wardrobe.

I feel overdressed and try to hard in them. I think it's hard to pull off the effortless look in heels. But I also feel like something is missing when I don't wear them on a night out for example.

I feel like it's yet another pointless trend for women to continue following - that are really uncomfortable and serve no real purpose.

I've also noticed younger women rarely wear them - have they seen the light?!

Or AIBU for feeling this way

[quote postingfortraffichere]@brokenbiscuitsx I agree there is certainly a north/south divide when it comes to fashions.

Also I guess it depends what circles you spend time on too. [/quote]
Yes I always feel like a scruff when I visit my friend but at the same time, thankful I don’t have to squeeze myself into body con and high heels on a night out.

I remember nights out in around 2010 when heels were ‘the thing’ and we’d all end up having to sit down when we wanted to dance (it was either take them off and possibly get glass in your feet or sit it out with stabbing pains in your feet) why did we do that to ourselves!

Love block heels hate all others.

I dont wear them but dont give a thought to anyone else who chooses to wear them"

Of course people look at what other people wear and make a snap judgement. Most people are very aware of what other people wear. If nobody cared what anyone else wore, half the population would walk around in overalls seven days a week!

I've never worn heels because it's patently obvious they are misogynistic instruments of torture and control.

Ffs. They hurt, they look stupid and they damaged your spine. And you look like a twat in them.

Yanbu. To me they always make someone look insecure. “I want to be taller!” “I want to feel sexier!” “I’m prepared to damage my feet and hobble my ability to run in the hope that you’ll find me more attractive.”

I know someone who wore heels regularly for her job and ended up with permanently damaged feet so that probably colours how I see them.

@Dancingonmoonlight

I dont wear them but dont give a thought to anyone else who chooses to wear them"

Of course people look at what other people wear and make a snap judgement. Most people are very aware of what other people wear. If nobody cared what anyone else wore, half the population would walk around in overalls seven days a week!

Exactly this. Annoying when spell pretend that what people wear others won't judge - it's BS. It's human nature to judge to an extent. We are human beings - why do designer brands make billions of pounds of it we're not the case and no one wanted to impress others?!

I have to admit I love wearing heels and do wear them any chance I get. That might not be the case as I get older, but I'll certainly make the most of wearing them while I enjoy them.

I can completely understand why some women don't like them though, I suppose it's a trade off between comfort and how they look or make you feel, and that trade off is different for everyone.

I personally don't wear them as they are uncomfortable, and don't think they look particularly attractive either. I think in years to come they will be seen as the equivalent of a corset.

I hate wearing heels and it feels so freeing to wear comfortable flat shoes and to not have to give any thought to how far I can walk and what I can do.

However, I’m going to a wedding in a few weeks and flat shoes look so frumpy with my knee length dress, and my legs look so much better with heels, so I’ll probably have to have painful feet all night. I can’t find any flat shoes that look good with a cocktail dress.

My high heel days are long gone. Would always wear them on a night out and special occasions.
But now due to dodgy feet (I think caused by the wearing of high heels in the first place!) and high arches, any higher than a kitten heel and I’m in agony.
Unfortunately Found this out when I attended my son and dils wedding earlier this year, Tried every type of shoe I could find. In the end had to change my whole outfit to accommodate flats (had to ditch the dress!)
But agree flats just don’t finish the outfit for me as I’m only 5” so I looked short and dumpy in the photos!

But having said that everyone that did wear heels ended up in flip flops/ sliders/bare feet and trainers and bride put her wellies on for some of the photos (during lockdown, pissing down with rain and all outside!) so the heels lasted until ceremony and photos were over!

I wear heels everyday in work and when I go out I wear heels. For me it makes me feel dressed up and sexy. I wouldn’t wear a dress or skirt etc with trainers or flats as it looks stupid.

They are bloody ridiculous and that's why men canned them centuries ago.

Something has happened over the last couple of years and now high heels look somewhat ridiculous and very dated.

I was never a fan tbh, but I did wear them sometimes. But my feet would be in agony, even the next day.

I am lucky enough to be fairly tall, but even my short friends have eschewed heels on a night out.

Most of can't wear them to an office and if the 90s are back I spent most of them wearing DMs then trainers.

I can't see myself wearing flats to a posh birthday party or wedding though.

I don't know about looking silly - that may depend on the wearer's height and also the general look of the shoes- but I absolutely cannot manage high-heeled shoes: I have co-ordination difficulties and would soon fall. I know other people who can't wear them due to painful foot conditions. I think that any employer who insists on employees wearing high heeled shoes should be taken to court under the Disability Discrimination Act - also likely for sex discrimination, as it's almost always about women.

I haven't been able to wear heels since I broke my leg 3 years ago.

I wouldn’t wear a dress or skirt etc with trainers or flats as it looks stupid

I think we've been conditioned to think this like the above poster has demonstrated.
If we see a man wearing a dress, we think it looks stupid yet if we travel to hot countries and see men wearing long robes, we accept it quite happily.

Its what we were used to for too long and changing takes time.
Smoking was once seen as glamorous and now people are seen as ill informed/unhealthy/stupid for smoking.

@postingfortraffichere

Oh please, posters suggesting this is a judgement thread are being far too sensitive.

What happened to being able to express and have an opinion and not like something!

I feel sad for women who wear heals. Not only do they look stupid, they are damaging their feet and their backs. I know that they say that they are doing it for themselves, but they are not. They are doing it for equally stupid men

It’s the way the opinion is expressed as just one of the comments above clearly shows, you can have an opinion without putting other women who wear heels down, so far we have had ridiculous, ageing, dated, odd, old, Private dancer, try hard, silly, middle aged, secretarial, to name but a few, to say this is not a judgemental thread is you being disingenuous OP as well you know, but then I guess that’s why you posted in AIBU and not style and beauty, you got the reactions you were looking for.

Have had to resort to kitten heels for dressing up. Went through years of pain and plasters. Wear flats now or boots. Foot pain was unbearable caused all sorts of problems. Never again.

@Ethelfromnumber73

They are bloody ridiculous and that's why men canned them centuries ago.

🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻 Yes this!!

I can’t believe how much time I wasted in pain and looking fucking ridiculous in heels. For a start I’m 6’ tall & in my 20’s was slim & reasonably striking without making myself into a giant to try and make myself ‘look better’ (just why!?).

I also could never walk properly in them so looked like a drunk baby deer. The amount of times I walked back from a club in bare feet (on the streets of East London) doesn’t bear thinking about all because I couldn’t handle wearing them
a moment longer. I fell over once & broke both kneecaps because of stupid heels (to be fair there may have been Chardonnay involved but it was mainly the heels..). They hurt the balls of my feet beyond belief. I spent a fortune on them. None of these are compelling reasons to wear heels!

I wore them to work because I felt pressure to (the ‘Ally McBeal years’ in the mid/late 90’s) often with designer suits which had skirts which finished about 3’ below my knickers, another fashion choice regret..

Honestly I’m ashamed of the time/effort & money that I invested in such a bonkers implement of pain. I’m very happy to never wear them again tbh. I rarely see young women wearing them these days, but when I do I feel sorry for them - it’s such a bizarre thing to do, but I clearly can’t judge as I did it for years.

Yep, you’re right.

I find it quite fascinating how our perceptions of what looks fashionable etc is just what we are used to seeing. Even 10 years ago most women at my work (professional office) wore heels of some sort. But no more! Some of the older ones do - but the young women I work with do not. This is in London.

@AmberLynn1536 I wasn't looking for anything.

I openly admitted myself I wear heels - so any criticism against it I'm including myself.

I find it sad that having an opinion these days is deemed unacceptable by some. It's strange.

I used to live n heels, mainly because I was short and felt more equal 3 or 4 inches taller, otherwise people had a tendency to speak to me as if I was a child (almost).

There were 5 years where my work was very physical, on my feel all day, running, up and down stairs, ladders, climbing about on stuff etc and I did it all in heels. I was used to them, didn't give it a second thought.

When I was 30, I'd worn 3" + heels for over 10 years. I was ill and lost most control over my legs. I had to wear flats, but my Achilles tendon needed to stretch, so I spent some weeks trying to walk on tip toes because I couldn't get my feet to bend at R angles to my legs! (On top of not really being able to feel my legs anyway!).

After about 4 years of forcing my legs to work, I was walking normally and could put heels on again. I never wore them that consistently again though. These days, my balance is shot (MS) so I can't wear them safely anyway. In fact I don't do much walking at all.

I have one pair of my old heels for nostalgia, but I also have a pair of drag queen shoes which are so high I have never seen anyone able to walk properly in them, though plenty have tried. Well, you can just about walk in them but you can't turn corners......