Partner violent when sugars are low.

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My good friend has recently had a baby with her partner. He is a type 1 diabetic and has had trouble stabilising his sugars since a recent injury.

He has very verbally aggressive and has pushed her. Two weeks ago he bit her on the arm. Each time he has blamed it on a sugar low and has gone to the GP to ask for help with this. My friend thinks this is not a reason to leave and not his fault because of the sugars. He has never been violent towards his kids from a previous relationship or the new baby.

I think the blood sugar excuse is bollocks and she should run for the hills. The fact he has never hurt the kids proves he can control himself. She is financially fine and has a flat to go to.
Has anyone had any experience of low sugar causing violence? Is he responsible? Should she leave?

YABU not his fault
YANBU she should leave

DB has type 1 diabetes. A hypo can send him all sorts of doolally. It’s exactly like someone who is blind drunk. And all sorts of things can affect his control - including illness or injury.

The ignorance on this thread isn’t shocking, because my expectations are low. But it is depressing.

It absolutely could be caused by his diabetes and the fact that he’s spoken to his GP to try and get it sorted speaks volumes.

If he’s otherwise a decent sort and this is out of character then she should support him to get his illness under control. However she can do that from a distance by having him move out for a while until he’s got it under control. Which he should be willing to do in order to safeguard his wife and baby. If he refuses to give her some space while he gets it under control then I’d be more worried.

Bollocks!!!
I've had T1 for over 50 years!!
Yes I get grumpy with a hypo, but I'm not violent by nature so would never bite or hit anyone!!
I have learned to treat my hypos quickly and not eat too much so I rollercoaster, or I feel crap next day and it takes ages for a high blood sugar to stabilise!

@Mrsweasleysclock

I have known diabetics to become aggressive because of low blood sure. I've seen it more in terms of verbal aggression than physical but yes it can severely affect mood.

I think nowadays you can get automated insulin devices that administer insulin automatically according to blood sugar levels. Maybe something like this would be more helpful as then hopefully the problem is solved before it gets to that level.

Either way she needs to make sure she and her baby are safe in the meantime.

Insulin when you have low blood sugar would result in lower blood sugar.

The ignorance here is shocking. A hypo can cause very out of character behaviour that the person is unaware of. This is because the brain is basically starved of glucose and fighting to stay conscious. Massive amounts of stress hormone are being pumped out. Sometimes, yes, people do become violent - push others trying to approach them, hit out at them, swear, stagger around. The person is NOT in control of what they’re doing. Their brain function has reduced to survival mode. They might appear conscious but there’s not the usual thinking processes going on.

So - you say her partner bit her? Was this when she was trying to treat his hypo or intervene? My friend has Type 1 and at school actually gave a teacher a massive shove during a hypo. It was a fear response. She couldn’t function and couldn’t understand the teacher was trying to help.

This man has seen his GP, got a Libre, and is trying to sort it out. Yes, it needs to be sorted out but it is perfectly possible he was unaware of what he was doing and unable to control himself.

That's bullshit. I feel tired when my blood sugars are low, I would rather be in bed than ramp up energy to start an argument with someone.

@secular39

That's bullshit. I feel tired when my blood sugars are low, I would rather be in bed than ramp up energy to start an argument with someone.

Given the many posts on here then it’s obviously not bullshit just a case of like many things different people are effected in different ways.

@secular39

That's bullshit. I feel tired when my blood sugars are low, I would rather be in bed than ramp up energy to start an argument with someone.

I wish I only felt tired when in a dangerous hypo, that would be a huge luxury.

Having a hypo affects people with T1D very differently. Such as feeling dizzy, blurred vision, acting strange or emotional. They need sugar and could very well be violent as you try to help as they don't know what they are doing. It's strange it's not happened before, but the answer here is to try and prevent lows before they happen. Which is where technology comes in. Has he shown remorse? Because you are posting here I wonder if he hasn't and was dismissive.... being genuine is the key thing here.

Oh and the Mars bar comment, that is very naive, you cannot get food and very often drink into a person in full hypo.

If you are lucky you can get a sugar drink like Lucozade in or maybe something like jam.

A hypo can make the diabetic rigid, as though they are catatonic. They will push away an attempt to get solid food in.

I have lost count the times I have had to call a medic because the only recourse is a drip.

Well it is a symptom which my friend's daughter has sometimes and she is normally lovely. He's trying to get help so maybe give him benefit of the doubt. Horrible condition.

@ajja2021 good for you.

I lived with a type 1 for 10 years, amongst other incidents he’s once tried to jump out of a third floor window at his mates house during a hypo and it took 3 of them to stop him. He’s has bitten his own tongue more than once during a hypo and once shoved his boss into a ditch during a hypo.

A friends husband tends to go totally rigid like a plank during a hypo which makes it difficult to get home if they are out since he’s 6’4”

It can affect diabetics in many different ways and they have zero control over it.
All sorts of things can can make it much harder to control like illness or injury.

They key here is the guy is seeking help so maybe read that before making snide remarks and piling on to the LTB train.

My DH is T2 and is a stroppy fuck when his sugars are low - he's never violent though.

Your friend's partner may be cranky when his sugars are low but he's violent cos he's a violent prick

@eyeslikebutterflies my partner self-funded libres for a while, then got his libre 1s funded just before he was due for a pump renewal a couple of years ago; at the time the libre wasn’t compatible with any of the pumps available that had hybrid closed loop capability so we made the decision to suck up the cost of a compatible sensor because the system/technology is genuinely life-changing… if they’re a financial possibility for your family I cannot recommend them highly enough.

YANBU. The evidence shows that aggression can be an in issue in hypoglycaemia but that doesn’t mean that your friend should have to stay and be his victim.

Hypos absolutely can cause aggressive behaviour. A guy at work had one, an incredibly gentle and mild mannered man, and he was fighting the paramedics and being very aggressive. It was hugely out of character for him. The paramedics said that it wasn't uncommon (we were all standing by horrified!)

So yes, it absolutely could be related to blood sugars. If this were my husband and it was a sudden change of behaviour that would be incredibly out of character for him, I would want to explore the medical issue first, as would most people I think? But he needs to be proactive about her safety and their children's safety.

Db screams like he’s being murdered if he has a hypo in his sleep. Just once. If you don’t hear it, he just lapses into unconsciousness. Luckily for him, last time this happened he shrieked just as DH got back from a walk so I was able to call 999 and get an emergency glucagon (the opposite hormone to insulin) into him. Or he might be dead.

They affect people in all sorts of different ways.

He need medication adjustments AND a psychologist pronto if he really wants to sort himself.

As a paramedic i've certainly come across patients being aggressive and violent whilst having hypos, so it's not unheard of.

People really need to think twice before posting things they have no knowledge about and will cause others to be misinformed. Its bloody dangerous.

Op, your friend, needs to leave her DP whilst he gets his blood sugar under control - diabetes or not, she shouldn't put herself at risk

[quote eyeslikebutterflies]**@thenewduchessofhastings* @TatianaBis* quite a few posters have posted here to report that, yes, they or their relatives have lashed out during an episode: at work, with the police, with ambulance staff, nurses and on and on. Read the thread for examples. You are very often not aware of what's happening during an episode like this (and not all diabetics are the same!): please please please educate yourselves on the realities of type 1 diabetes.

It's so distressing to read comments like yours, which I'm sure wasn't your intention. And you could also save a life: many diabetics have ended up in comas due to people walking past them and writing them off as drunk or whatever, when in fact they were in the midst of a hypo or hyperglycemic episode - both of which are medical emergencies.[/quote]
I have a close relative with type 1 diabetes so this is really fucking irritating.

When you’re dealing with a bloke you don’t know you cannot trustingly assume that his violence is triggered by a diabetic hypo. Some people get violent with a hypo some don’t.

Some men are triggered to violence by a new baby. Some women end up in comas after they’d had a baby because they’ve been thumped by their partner who was never previously violent. If anything perhaps you should educate yourself on the realities of da.

It can happen but rare best off asking doctors and specialist rather than man hating randoms on the internet . They will have medical history and knowledge to answer the question properly and help your friend make the correct choice

@mikeyboo We're very excited. Although the diagnosis was a terrible shock, we feel lucky really because closed loop tech sounds like it's very new on the NHS. I know it'll stop the kind of problem that this thread is all about and, more importantly (for my son), reduce the likelihood of long-term damage that leads to eye problems, kidney failure, early death etc etc.

I hope everyone on here who is T1 or has relatives/friends who are, is aware that these techs are now available on the NHS: continuous glucose monitors and 'closed loop' system insulin pumps-apps-monitors are genuinely life-changing and, according to our diabetic nurse, still improving 'almost weekly'. Who knows what the future holds.

(OP, sorry for the hijack! I stand by my earlier posts: there's a lot your friend can do, and her partner likewise, and it's worth her exploring all of that before making a decision to LTB.)

@cinders15

Bollocks!!! I've had T1 for over 50 years!! Yes I get grumpy with a hypo, but I'm not violent by nature so would never bite or hit anyone!! I have learned to treat my hypos quickly and not eat too much so I rollercoaster, or I feel crap next day and it takes ages for a high blood sugar to stabilise!

Count yourself lucky, then. Some T1s have very unstable blood sugars, no matter how careful and compliant they are. They don't need smug numpties judging them because of it.

Just like with most other long-term conditions - asthma, COPD, heart disease, hypertension - some people with diabetes are lucky, and respond well to treatment, so remain stable. And some people are unlucky. If your diabetes is well-controlled and you have never been violent during a hypo, it's not because you are morally superior to other diabetics.

So much misinformation on this thread.

As many posters have said now, some diabetics can react violently when having a hypo. When I was at secondary school, a diabetic friend of mine would get very agitated when hypo and try and physically attack anyone trying to help, and unfortunately the ignorance of staff and lack of support often meant she would be in trouble for the behaviour, impeding actually treating the hypo.

In the case of your friend,i don't think her moving out is the best idea, as I don't think someome with poorly controlled blood sugar should be alone. Is there a family member of friend he could temporarily stay with until he's more stable?