To think 36 isn’t that old for a first baby

[Youcanbesweet]

Old school friend has told me that people are saying she’s too old to be pregnant.

Just had a baby at 37. At every appointment they’d call you by stating your name and date of birth. I was always the oldest there!

Also, it’s lonely as all my friends are done and dusted with their kids. Their youngest are pretty much in secondary late primary school. So it does feel lonely

It depends on what circles you move in. My social circle are university educated, good careers, stable relationships. Only started having children in 30’s and onward.

Lots of women in my home town didn’t go to uni all had multiple kids in their early 20’s. It would probably seem old to them.

I was 35 when I conceived and 36 when DS was born. At that point we'd been married for 14 years. We started TTC a couple years prior. Never considered having a second child as DS was a total dream baby and we didn't think we'd be that lucky twice

It would be too old for me in a personal sense, I wouldn't have had kids past 32 max. But I don't think there is such thing as too old generally. Surely it's when you hit the menopause that you become TOO old?! People should mind their own business. And it's a shame these threads always have to become so bitchy and snooty.

God forbid people don't go to uni!!!!!

I've got three kids. I had them at 35, 36 and 39 - I'm 41 now.

I am by no means the oldest mum at the school/nursery gates, so I think having kids in your late 30s is pretty normal where I live. I certainly don't think it's comment worthy.

I didn't want children earlier and didn't meet DH until I was 31 (ex DH was infertile) so there wasn't much I could have done about if I'd wanted to.

When I was pregnant at 39 there was no mention of 'geriatric' or advanced age or anything, I actually thought that was a myth!

It’s ‘normal’ around where I live - an affluent area of London. Most women focus on their careers until their mid or late 30s. There aren’t many (any?) new mothers in their teens or early twenties, very few in their late 20s and then more in their early 30s and older.

Personal choice but it would be too old for me tbh for a quite a few reasons.

I was 35, friends 34,36,40 and an outlier at 30 for 1st dc...and didn't really stand out a toddler groups/parents etc...mixture if reasons careers, partners, fertility issues but not too old ....

For me- absolutely too old. I wouldnt want to start a family when I'm middle aged (35-45, so lifespan 70-90 seems to cover it for most people). But quite a few do have them older in life, not hugely uncommon.

Gosh this thread is scary. No it's not old. What a horrible thing to make someone feel like that.

@PoppityInThe

For me- absolutely too old. I wouldnt want to start a family when I'm middle aged (35-45, so lifespan 70-90 seems to cover it for most people). But quite a few do have them older in life, not hugely uncommon.

Average life expectancy for a woman in the UK is 81 years. If you have a kid in your mid-thirties, and live to the average age, the kid will be in their mid-fortifies by the time you die! And all other things being equal, fully independent!

Of course its old. It's called a geriatric pregnancy for a reason.
But nowadays it's the new 'normal'...

Average age for my friends and acquaintances. I never even considered it old.

Of course not. It’s older than the Uk average but where I am (London suburbs), it is a very normal age for a first baby. The average age in my NCT group was 33

I had at 34 and 36 and at DCs school, I’m actually one of the younger mums

@Marvellousmadness

Of course its old. It's called a geriatric pregnancy for a reason. But nowadays it's the new 'normal'...

Actually it’s not a geriatric pregnancy.

The term geriatric pregnancy is not an accurate one since geriatrics involves medical treatment of the elderly and pregnancy is not an issue that affects the elderly,” explains Dr. Barry Witt, a board-certified reproductive endocrinologist, Chief Medical Director with WINFertility and Medical Director of Yale Medicine Greenwich Fertility Center

In the past, doctors used to describe pregnancies that happened in women over the age of 35 as “geriatric pregnancies.” Today, however, for obvious reasons, doctors don’t use the term geriatric pregnancy anymore

What Is Geriatric Pregnancy?
Geriatric pregnancy is a rarely used term for having a baby when you’re 35 or older

@Marvellousmadness

Of course its old. It's called a geriatric pregnancy for a reason. But nowadays it's the new 'normal'...

You seem to have a very unpleasant attitude about the choices other women make around reproduction. What got to you?

Not old at all - plenty of people have their first child older than that nowadays. Almost everybody I know had their first child at mid to late thirties.
Full time University Education, career development and globetrotting came before settling down with babies.

It’s not anyone else’s business.

I'd say too late. My husband and I have agreed none once we hit 30. He had younger parents and I didn't and we know what we wanted our children to have. x

I was 38 when I had my dd and personally I think I was too old. But that’s just me, and the fact that I’m now 43 and haven’t slept through the night for 5 and a half years and dd is very ‘spirited’.

There's no right or wrong choice and often there isn't even a choice. I used to say no babies after 25 and started trying aged 22. My firstborn was completely out of the blue unexpected after 17yrs infertility. I was 39. My second was born when I was 41.

They are grown up and at uni now.