There is a world of difference between a wanted pregnancy and an unwanted one. That is why, as a mother, I am firmly pro-choice. As a mother I know how much work, time, care and competence goes into bringing up a child and recognise that people who really don't have those qualities at a particular time in their lives, might reasonably choose not to have a child. I am also aware that it is very rare for a woman to give up her baby voluntarily once born. So, a decision to proceed with a pregnancy is, almost always, an 18 year+ commitment to bringing up a child.
A real child and a notional child are very different entities. This is why ideas, feelings and arguments about contraception, abortion and notional babies, are very, very different form ideas and feelings about real people who exist in the world.
What I read in your OP is that you came from a wanted pregnancy.
I read you saying that what is angering you is that a woman with a wanted pregnancy, who was vulnerable and seeking guidance, was coerced towards abortion for someone else's convenience. My take on it is that it is that coercion, of a vulnerable woman, by a powerful man, that is, rightly, angering you.
If your mum had had an abortion because she had an unwanted pregnancy - and maybe she did at another time - that would have been her choice.
I think you are annoyed with your DH because he appears to be dismissing your thoughts and feelings and telling you he knows best - much like that vicar did to your mum.
He appears to be more interested in playing games and scoring points in an argument, than in listening to you and your feelings. He is trying to tell you what you think and feel. Playing at being a psychoanalyst. Only thing is, real psychoanalysts do not tell what you think and feel. They listen and support you as you work through your own feelings.