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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

‘Nice’ Things That Aren’t Actually

849 replies

WheelieBinPrincess · 14/09/2021 12:22

Just a random musing.

Breakfast in bed- lovely idea, reality is you need to get up for a wee and then a tray is plonked on your lap, and groggy from sleep you are supposed to exclaim in delight over bits of pastry flaking into your sheets and slopping coffee down yourself and trying to subtly get the sluggy bits of fat off the bacon because you usually just get medallions.

Relaxing massage- I went the other day and I kept thinking ‘I’ll switch off and enjoy it in a minute’ but just kept thinking about whether to get the tube or the bus home and if there are oven chips in the freezer or not or if I watered my peace lily last week and if not it’s probably died. Then it was finished and it cost me £80.

Anyone got anything they can add to things that sound so nice as an idea but in reality are just not really?

OP posts:
Ori3 · 14/09/2021 13:29

New Year's Eve. I never stay up for it. It's so shit. I'd honestly rather be in bed having a snooze, so I do this instead. However the year before last I was rudely awakened by the sound of my cat being shagged on the landing by the biggest Tom I've ever seen. It was literally seconds after the countdown. So she lived it large. And so did he, clearly.

Linked to the above - New Year's Resolutions. 99% of the time they're a sure way to make yourself feel even crappier when the inevitable happens and you ditch them two weeks later, in the middle of January. The coldest, bleakest, most shite time of year and you feel like a FAILURE because you've stuffed yourself full of cream cakes after a fortnight of uncomfortable restraint.

Promotions. Usually a poisoned chalice. For a number of reasons.

Going out for the evening when you're new parents (i.e. the first year after birth.) It's a fucking nightmare getting out the house, you eat/drink really quickly, talk about the baby all night and return home at 9.30am LATEST because you're anxious, only to have the babysitter tell you he/she hasn't woken up at all. And you're over £60 light.

Al fresco dining in the UK. Hate it hate it hate it. Hate the fecking wind in my face, my food going cold in seconds, my hair being fucked up by the elements, feeling chilly. Just want to eat indoors.

Having children. Yeah it's alright sometimes. You love them. But it's hardly roses round the door, they fuck up your house and you have no money. Sometimes they catch you having sex. And they drop your precious things down the loo which really pisses you off.

Having a career is also very shit. Careers aren't nice things, they're bloody horrible. No-body enjoys having a career in reality. Better to have a lower-paid job that you actually enjoy.

DynamoKev · 14/09/2021 13:29

Holidays that involve flying anywhere

GoodbyePorpoiseSpit · 14/09/2021 13:30

Sex anywhere other than a bed
Picnics
Wagamamas
Spa days
Hairdresser's head/hand/neck massage just want it over
Building a snowman

sylbunny · 14/09/2021 13:31

@JesusInTheCabbageVan

Martinis. I suspect that only about 3% of people who order them actually like them.
I absolutely love an extra dry martini with an olive. It's my all time favourite cocktail.
honeylulu · 14/09/2021 13:31

@silverbubbles Yes agree about work dos, especially the Christmas ones. Everyone getting dressed up and going to a hotel for a very unexceptional dried out roast dinner. In the last couple of years (pre Covid) our firm went back to basics and we started having our Christmas do in the office again like the old days. Disco in the boardroom and lashings of free booze. Much better!

Brindlepaws · 14/09/2021 13:31

Oh yes, new year's eve is peak "nice things that aren't" Grin

Bogofftosomewherehot · 14/09/2021 13:31

Flowers.
Christmas - just want to cancel it forever!!!
Work team building events - just NO!!
Weddings and hen-do'.

Think I've just realised I'm an introvert!

(But love a good bath, massage and breakfast in bed).

Pottedpalm · 14/09/2021 13:33

@LeafOfTruth

Anything involving a spa. Spa Days honestly sound like torture days, to me.

If someone gave me the option of a spa day or a day cleaning the fat out the sewers, I'd take the latter Grin

Yep, me too.
BoringBettie · 14/09/2021 13:33

I’m going to sound really miserable but… Summer!

I hate baths too!

Lauraa7 · 14/09/2021 13:33

Not too keen on holidays. I love my home and my bed, and I’d much prefer to do day trip and then come home!

HopingForOurRainbowBaby · 14/09/2021 13:33

@WheelieBinPrincess

Yes what IS it with fruit tea? Why do they all taste like compost?
The twinings roobios with honey and spiced fig is nice and it doesn't leave that yucky aftertaste either. The only others I can drink are chamomile either plain or with Jasmine or spiced apple, and peppermint or nettle. Everything else smells lovely but tastes feck all like it smells
allfurcoatnoknickers · 14/09/2021 13:34

Hot chocolate. I always want it to be like a cup of melted chocolate bars and only about 3 places in the world make it like that Angry

kwiksavenofrillsusername · 14/09/2021 13:34

Santa experiences. No matter what day or time you choose, your children WILL be in a shit mood, cry through the entertainment and refuse to ice biscuits with Mrs Claus. Then you have to queue in a garden centre shed for an hour either feeling too hot or too cold, or both at once, to see Santa and the kids just sort of stare into space while he’s doing his schtick. You might get a nice photo out of the 75 notes you’ve just spent, but they’ll try and upsell you on a 15 quid glittery frame for it.

Those wine/whiskey tasting experiences. I’ve been given a couple of them and it’s always a waiter from the bar reading some notes and trying to justify charging you a fortune for three tiny samples of booze.

MarleneDietrichsSmile · 14/09/2021 13:34

Agree with so many of these Grin

Massages only work for me as part of a whole day spa , I can’t relax on command (in 1 hr), it’s pointless and I end up thinking about things like oven chips 😄

peaceanddove · 14/09/2021 13:34

Fresh flowers - can never find a vase, can never arrange them nicely, then just watching them die, followed by the faff of disposing of them.

Spa days - I have been to the best in the country, but only 2 hours in and I'm bored. Very bored.

Disfordarkchocolate · 14/09/2021 13:35

Work.

AuntMargo · 14/09/2021 13:35

Takeaways - always give me trots
Babysitting grandkids - cant wait for them to get picked up ( yes i do still love them to bits)
Family holidays - always an argument
Work nights out - worked with them all week, dont wanna see them out of work !

ferretface · 14/09/2021 13:35

Bath trays.

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 14/09/2021 13:36

It's nice to have some joy in my life! But actually I didn't say I loved everything?! hmm As I don't, but honestly this just seems like competitive misery. I'm happy for people to like what they like and try to take enjoyment where I can.

Why not try to take enjoyment in this thread then? Wink Or, if not, add your own contribution: "Threads about 'nice' things that aren't actually nice make me miserable"

RaspberryThief · 14/09/2021 13:36

Yes to clothes shopping. I love clothes. I absolutely loathe having to shop for them. Everything is expensive, poor fabrics and finishing, weird styles that don't suit etc. Wading through all that and returning boiling hot, frustrated, feeling like a million stone is not in the slightest bit enjoyable.

Holidays with small DC, sadly. A very expensive way of everybody getting zero sleep and being too furiously overtired and grumpy to enjoy doing anything the next day. I keep reading MN threads with people talking about "relaxing on bedtimes", "going with the flow", "popping them in the buggy to sleep while you go to a bar or a restaurant" etc and just think hahahaha nope, clearly how the other half live but my DC just never got that memo.

Saunas. Just no. Why would I want to sit and sweat with half-naked strangers, stone-cold sober, for a hobby?

SarahBellam · 14/09/2021 13:37

Gifts for babies that require MORE work - photoshoot vouchers, clay footprint kits, personalised teddy to stitch...all that shit. Buy us a packet of nappies and a lasagne any day.

Gonnagetgoing · 14/09/2021 13:37

@SoundBar

Takeaway. Since I learned to cook they just taste disgusting and I resent the expense!
My last takeaway over lock down I’ve had the same dishes in house in the restaurant and they tasted much better there but I was so disappointed that what I’d ordered as a takeaway (maybe their chef had changed?) didn’t taste anywhere near as nice as when I’d had it in house!
FlintVehicleCity · 14/09/2021 13:38

Champagne. Tastes bad and a cause of major hangovers.

Cuddlemuffin · 14/09/2021 13:38

I no I love a massage! But Spa days are rubbish.

Sharing a 'romantic' bath
Sharing a bed with your young child
Most Chinese takeaways

coodawoodashooda · 14/09/2021 13:39

Staff nights out

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