to think "no woman aborts a baby lightly" is untrue and unhelpful?

[ZoeCM]

I've noticed this phrase being used a lot following the news about Texas. I'm pro-choice, and I don't think it helps our cause.

There are women who have abortions lightly. It's not a myth started by the Daily Mail. I don't even think it's necessarily even that rare.

There are women who actively want a baby in the near future, are in stable relationships, aren't even using contraception, but still decide to abort because the timing isn't 100% perfect: they don't want to cancel their holiday abroad, or give birth until the extension on their house is finished. Trust me, it happens. Does anyone really think those women agonised over whether the holiday/extension was more important than the baby, before painfully including that abortion was the only option? Of course not. And that's fine. Women shouldn't have to ask if their reasons for aborting are "good enough".

Then there are the women who are on their fifth or sixth abortion - workers at abortion clinics will confirm that this does happen. It seems unlikely that those women agonised over their decisions either, because presumably they would have put some long-term contraception in place to stop it happening again. I expect most of them come from pretty traumatic backgrounds, but that doesn't mean their decision to abort isn't made perfectly casually.

This phrase is a gift for pro-lifers, because it's so easily disproved: many of them will have stories about women they know who've had abortions without a second thought. A better argument would simply be that it doesn't matter why a woman wants an abortion: she should be allowed one because it's her body and her choice.

@DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult

Abortion is simply going back to life exactly as it was before.

Its more thought provoking to keep a pregnancy imo.

A woman should have an abortion simply because she wants one, it's not the bloody xfactor where there needs to be a sob story.

This

@Islamorada

Tell me @Islamorada , how exactly does one use abortion as contraception? It is called pro choice.

What does that even mean?

@Islamorada

Tell me @Islamorada , how exactly does one use abortion as contraception? It is called pro choice.

I have no idea what you are on about. I simply asked how abortion, something which can only happen if conception has occurred, can be used as a contraceptive. Perhaps you don't actually know what the word means?

Islamorada contraception prevents pregnancy, abortion ends pregnancy. It can't be used as a form of contraception as it isnt preventing the pregnancy from happening in the first place, just prevents it from progressing further

I think there is this expectation that abortion should be an appropriate "punishment" for itself, and thus the experience must be traumatic and life-defining. Experiencing anything less than that obviously means that you are a sinful, callous person who loves having sex (out of wedlock, even ) more than preserving life

@Islamorada You clearly don't understand pregnancy. Contra ception is something that prevents conception. When a person is pregnant, they've already conceived.

Therefore an abortion doesn't prevent conception, it erases the contents of it.

Pro choice means believing women shouldn't be subjected to Gestational Slavery. Forced pregnancy is slavery and is seen by the UN as a Human Rights Violation. Pro choice is simply the default position. To be anti choice is to be pro Gestational Slavery.

I may have misread the dialectic but I thought this argument was used to justify later term abortions being legal. And in that context it is true. No one has a late term abortion lightly.

I commented before that I’ve had an abortion, but I also work in abortion services. I’m extremely lucky to work alongside doctors and nurses that are passionate about women’s rights and providing them care.

I don’t expect anything of the women that come in needing an abortion. Whether she wants to be solemn or blasé, grieving or celebratory, is entirely up to her. I don’t want any woman to be ‘mindful’ of my feelings in regards to her own pregnancy. It has absolutely nothing to do with me. Women are entitled to treat their own abortion as lightly or as heavily as they want to.

I was shocked as i thought she would have been advised about contraception

Perhaps she was given this advice. If that is the case, why the hell didn't someone intervene? Why didn't someone ask any questions? Why didn't anyone check she understood?

I agree WheresTheLamb it’s as if some people can only tolerate the idea of abortion as long as the woman feels deeply upset and traumatised by it. Like it needs to be punished somehow.

@TryingAndFailing39

I agree. The way abortion is sometimes spoken about so trivially makes me really sad.

I don’t think that’s what the OP is saying, though — she’s saying it’s not true that all abortions are performed after agonising decisions, and that this is fine, that not wanting to continue a pregnancy is a good enough reason to choose to terminate.

I think if someone has one unplanned pregnancy and decide to abort that is fine, but for some girls making the same decision 5 or 6 times is what I don't agree with.

I went through it once and I would never ever want to go through it again and I would assume other women would feel the same way. There is definitely women out there that use abortions as a form of contraception.

And as for the 12 week mark, most women would know they were pregnant by then, obviously there is times when women don't know until they literally give birth. I don't think abortion at 24 weeks is the same. I'm sorry I just don't. If you gave birth to a baby at 24 weeks then they have a high chance of survival. That's the difference.

I’ve read all of the replies and have come to the conclusion that every post is interpreting the word “lightly” slightly differently. Which is possibly causing the problem.

I agree, some people have abortions with no more thought than swatting a fly. For others, it a huge moral dilemma.

And before the 'mind your own business argument' kicks in - it's everybody's business as it about the law of the land, which we all have a say in shaping and in deciding what type of country we live in, what values we uphold and how we value human life at the beginning and the end.

@Hoodie23

All these saying there should be a limit, imagine this scenario...
1 woman

Pregnant at 16 has an abortion not ready to be a mum
A few years later her contraception fails. Another abortion.
Then she plans a pregnancy, but very early on her partner becomes abusive. She ends the pregnancy and escapes domestic violence
Shes now 30, and single. She's raped after a night out, discovers she's pregnant to the rapist. Aborts so she's not raising a rapists child
Then she's finally in a happy relationship, pregnant but the child won't make it after the birth, it's not developed as expected so she aborts to save herself the heartache of continuing the pregnancy

Thats 5 abortions. Which pregnancy/pregnancies should she have continued?

^ can you answer which pregnancies she should have been forced to continue?

I thought the coil worked after conception but before implantation. That is regaded as a form of contraception.

I agree with the op. Like other posters have said I think some people think women should suffer with the decision as a punishment.

I have two children, and I’ve always known that if I had a contraceptive failure now I’d choose an abortion rather than a third child. Hopefully if that ever arises I’ll realise early. In that case I can’t imagine being traumatised or guilty, just incredibly relieved to be living in a country where I have that right.
I agree that (although I can see why the rhetoric is used) it can be unhelpful in framing abortion as something women ought to feel guilty and traumatised about.

I've only ever seen that answer given when people are talking about (usually very) late abortions and i think it's spot on about those. I really don't think anyone skips off to the abortion clinic without a care in the world though, do they?

I am a catholic and I am completely against abortion, it IS a baby and it IS murder but I don't think women are evil for having them I do however abortion is evil and I think society has been brainwashed into thinking it's ok, if you look back throughout history things that would happen that were considered "normal" that never would be now simply because it was the done thing back then and it was just something people were used too. An unborn baby has the right to life and my heart breaks for women who are seeking abortions because of rape, abuse etc but yes I still believe the child should be born. Of course it is horrible for children in care and a lot of the situations are heartbreaking but atleast they are alive and have the chance to have a good life, just like you wouldn't murder someone with a bad life because there life wasn't happy anyway.The few posters who disagree with abortion are being attacked on here which isnt fair we are all just giving our opinions. And for those saying so what? Mind your business! I believe abortion is murder and whether you agree with that or not would you mind your own business when its came to murder? Would it be upsetting or atleast make you uncomfortable if someone murdered some one and spoke so casually about it? I'm just trying to explain for those who genuinely don't understand why it would bother me or anyone else who is pro life.

@EdgeOfACoin

Some people are very uncomfortable with the thought of terminating a human life. I am one of them. I take an equally dim view of men who have sex with women and then try to pressure them into having an abortion.

I also think that in the modern world, with the various contraception options open to us, there is little excuse for getting pregnant accidentally.

Do I think abortion should be illegal? No. Do I think abortion should not be trivialised, that the termination of a human life is more significant than ending a toothache and that abortion is not just another form of contraception? Yes.

You can accuse my attitudes of coming from the 1950s if you wish, but oh well. This is a matter of conscience for me. It is possible to understand the reasons for needing legal abortion while still holding a negative view of the process.

And once again, for the people at the back, I do believe abortion needs to be legal to an extent.

But while I believe many women agonise over their decisions, there are certainly those who do not.

Excellent post.

Lexie365

I'm a Catholic too. A foetus isn't alive in its own right. If you want to claim it has a heartbeat so it's alive, so do thread worms so next time you end up with an itchy arse, stay away from the oven. They've chosen you as their host and have the right to life.

Ha,ha,ha.. well I must say that for a first world country where contraception is free and available to all. Even after sex like the morning after pill. So many women are having abortions because their kitchens are not ready or they are going on holidays. Therefore, using abortion rather than preventing a pregnancy. They can do whenever they want with their bodies but I do not respect them at all. Do I want people who seems entitled to rights and not responsibilities having children. Of course not.

Ovex*