To ask what was the most prolific thing you have done to change your life for the better?

[Dotdotlineline]

I'm in a bit of a funk today so want to know what other people do when faced with an idea of changing something.

Has anyone ever made a drastic or even a small change for the better? Whether that be spiritually / money wise or with themselves?

I keep thinking about the notion that 'life is what you make of it' and questioning where I am going wrong.

On a whim, I messaged a guy I'd briefly dated several years earlier. Hadn't spoken or seen each for years , but I just thought of him and wondered how he was. We're a family now.

This is going to be the most unpopular answer on here as Mumsnet HATES Christians.

Of course MN doesn't hate Christians! I'm a hard-line atheist and I don't hate Christians in the slightest. Some MNers will certainly argue quite robustly against the existence of god(s) or the various failings of organiser religions, but it's pretty daft to think that means they hate anyone just because they're a Christian! I know some lovely Christians.

This is a great thread. I don't have much to add from my own life, but it's really reassuring to see the same responses coming up several times. The Mumsnet formula for a happy life seems to be:

• Exercise
• Leaving bad relationships
• Therapy
• Saving/clearing debt/reducing expenditure
• Retraining/education
• Reducing alcohol
• Changing job. Interesting that more people have mentioned more fulfilling/less stressful jobs than have mentioned better pay.

Also strong votes for setting boundaries and emigrating. Thanks for starting this OP, given me a lot to think about.

Your very welcome @MarisPiper92 I keep reading this back and it's so uplifting.

I have my first therapy session booked for Wednesday evening off the back of this thread. So thank you everyone for giving me that push .

@MarisPiper92

This is a great thread. I don't have much to add from my own life, but it's really reassuring to see the same responses coming up several times. The Mumsnet formula for a happy life seems to be:

• Exercise
• Leaving bad relationships
• Therapy
• Saving/clearing debt/reducing expenditure
• Retraining/education
• Reducing alcohol
• Changing job. Interesting that more people have mentioned more fulfilling/less stressful jobs than have mentioned better pay.

Also strong votes for setting boundaries and emigrating. Thanks for starting this OP, given me a lot to think about.

Great summary.

Agree interesting about more fulfilling roles rather than clambering up the ladder to earn lots of money.

I have loved reading this thread. It has given me a lot to think about. I think my year abroad when I left school had a very significant impact on me - I am very different I realise from the in laws who seem very nervous going abroad but otherwise are from are very similar background. I was an au pair with a great family and went to uni with a year of living away behind me. I grew up a lot that year. My parents left home younger than I did, both going into the forces, and although my DS1 hasn’t done that, other than for uni, he has taken every opportunity to travel ( well when he could at least). He is very different to his cousins in that respect.
What I need to do now is shift the weight. The posts about emotional eating have resonated with me. I haven’t got the money to go for surgery and I know it isn’t the right way when you’ve only got 3 stone to shift but I have got to focus on breaking old bad habits and building new ones.

This thread literally made me get off of my fat bum and get the switch boxing out and do it! then i got some fresh fruit and Greek yogurt from the shop ready for breakfast and prepped a salad to go with my dinner! the lifestyle change i keep saying is going to happen is starting right now!!

I wanna be you when I grow up! Would you mind if I private message you re the IT courses that you took?

Gawd, its so annoying you cant edit your messages, @fluffypinkt, would it be ok if I private messaged you re your post?

@Shikamiri, I tried inboxing you but for what ever reason it won’t let me so I’ll respond to you here.

I would Google open learn free courses first and foremost. The website it takes you too should be openlearn.edu. Scroll down the free courses and you want to be under the science tab. Continue scrolling down to the IT section and all your courses that are free are there. It really depends on what kind of IT career you want to go into. I myself did computer science introduction to networking lab.
Cyber security.
Network security.
Malware and virus.
But there’s loads there for you to get you’re teeth into with out having to pay out for loads and loads of tuition.
If you want to get into IT I would definitely recommend trying to get an entry level position in an office such as a cleaner as if you get stuck or you’re unsure of something your peers are in the know, and it also shows willingness to learn. I hope this helps.

@OctaviaTriangle

I had a breast reduction and a tummy tuck!

How did the breast reduction go? I really want a reduction I'm an F cup at least. So fed up with painful bras digging into my skin.

How did the breast reduction go? I really want a reduction I'm an F cup at least. So fed up with painful bras digging into my skin.

Me too exactly!! I would like a breast reduction one day, I am very interested in this. octavia, Do you feel more comfortable? Do you now have less painful bras?

This thread has been amazing. Thank you for starting it OP.

It's made me realise how stuck I am. I don't know what to do about it but you've all inspired me to try.

I most likely have ADHD and it feels like a handbrake that is permanently stuck on.

I'm going to try small changes to start with.

Thank you ❤️

7 years ago I used an inheritance from my Mum to use as deposit on a btl. I bought for £103k and used rest of money to completely renovate The house has gone up in value by £85k and mortgage is now only £37k remaining. Over the 7 years the rent more than covered the repayment mortgage and gave me small income of £200 pcm. Investing in property is a sound investment.

Fluffypinkt

I quit a job I hated ( but quite well paid) and took a job as a cleaner in an office during the pandemic. I have no IT training. So embarked on an IT course so I could converse with the people I worked for. I now work for that very same company. From home on double my annual salary.
I took a step back to take 5 steps forward.

Please can I ask which IT course/s you did?
There are so many and I don’t know where to start!

Sorry Fluffypinkt I now see you've already answered that!

I've been popping on the thread between tasks!

Therapy and setting boundaries
Leaving ExH and blocking him on everything = peace and quiet, no more abuse, no more drama
Doing a degree and Professional qualifications = much better job I wouldn't have otherwise

Braces = no1 to feel more confident
Semi permanent brows
Nail gel polish and doing it at home
Gym membership and staying fit
Eating healthy 90% of time
Cutting toxic people out
Spending time with positive people that make me laugh a lot

Things I still need to do:
Reduce coffee
Drink more water

Wonderful thread, thanks for starting it. My changes are similar to many – stopped drinking alcohol, started daily journalling and self-reflection at the same time as reading about psychology, personal responsibility and self-awareness. That was life-changing and led to me ending a relationship that was not good for me.

Also, I know you've received plenty of assurance about this...

Wow I didn't make a thread to be belittled and mocked for using the wrong word. It was a genuine mistake and now I feel utterly embarrassed and stupid sad

...but I just want to add that as a professional editor, amateur grammar-policing in forums (or social media or whatever) makes me cringe inwardly. The only time I correct writing is when someone is paying me to do so, and when I do, I'm respectful about it.

Never let anyone make you feel embarrassed or stupid about a grammatical mistake in casual writing. Editors know that everyone does it – including themselves and the world's most highly paid writers. Rudely chastising a stranger about their grammar is only done by people who need to blow off their own bad feelings by creating a false sense of self-superiority through pointless pettiness.

@thatfuckingtent

This thread has been amazing. Thank you for starting it OP.

It's made me realise how stuck I am. I don't know what to do about it but you've all inspired me to try.

I most likely have ADHD and it feels like a handbrake that is permanently stuck on.

I'm going to try small changes to start with.

Thank you ❤️

I hear you. I feel like that too and think I may have "high functioning " ADHD.

• career change that meant less money but less stress & more free time/flexibility

• Accepting that some people don’t like me. And that’s ok.

• Stopping being a people pleaser and prioritising my own priorities - not other people’s

• joining a cycling club

Decluttered. It gave me the space to start a business from home.

Got rid of alcoholic DH after battling for 3 years to 'help' him change.
3 years later joined internet dating site and found partner on 1st date, still together after 7 years! (But we don't live together)
Running and yoga, one or the other every day.
Downsizing and moving to a cheaper area to ditch the mortgage, thereby enjoying home improvements and little luxuries I can now afford.
Next: still trying to get back into a job I love...had to leave one 6 years ago because they moved offices away...

Oops wrong thread, asked to delete previous!

Prioritised my health and exercise. Lost 5 stone in 8 months. It’s had knock on effect that I have more energy and confidence. I then changed career direction after 20 years.