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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to feed DH the same meal twice?

541 replies

KidsAreMean · 09/09/2021 06:33

DH won't eat the same meal twice in one week. I, personally think it's absolutely bonkers, but apparently MIL never did (I must verify this with her!) and he doesn't like it. Fine. I've got used to it. However, usually during the week, I cook for the DC and will e.g. make a double portion of lunch which we eat 2 days later.
This week I made a massive lasagne. Plan: Monday lunch, Wednesday lunch when DH is home office and then we'd finish the rest Thursday lunch. Except DH has now decided he's working from home today (as well as yesterday). I don't have any other food in apart from eggs which he doesn't like. Else I can make an emergency pasta & tomato sauce - which is basically same as the lasagne!
So AIBU to serve him the lasagne? I'd planned to do the weekly shop tomorrow, going today will inconvenience me next week (even though I'm a sahm).

OP posts:
NoNoThankYou · 09/09/2021 09:10

I'd check he's been paying your NI contributions and workplace pension, OP, as he clearly views you as a slightly wayward employee.

billy1966 · 09/09/2021 09:12

🙄

Sexnotgender · 09/09/2021 09:12

@Randommother

YABU to "serve" him anything. There's lasagne for lunch, he can heat some up if he wants it, or make himself something else!
This. He’s an adult. He can take it or leave it, those are his choices.
2catsandhappy · 09/09/2021 09:12

Is he a cat?

Themorethemerrier · 09/09/2021 09:16

Op, if you only have eggs in it would seem that things are tight financially and I’d have no qualms telling him - how I work out the menu is cost effective and if you’re not happy it’s too bad.

suredsun · 09/09/2021 09:18

50% of the working population probably eat the exact same sandwich every single day. He is being unreasonable, you are not.
He's lucky to have a home-cooked meal, (and it's better for everyone, the family budget and the environment to eat it rather than chuck it out). If he doesn't want it he should make himself a sandwich.

ImprobablePuffin · 09/09/2021 09:19

@2catsandhappy

Tell him to go to the kitchen and sort his lunch out himself. And warn him not to trip over his pile of ironing that he needs to do. ok so presuming a bit there. Seriously though, he changed his plans and didn't give you enough notice to come up with a plan B. His problem, not yours.
But WHY should OP need to come up with a plan B at all?

I'm wondering if this is just a thread to get people wound up

Goldiemummy · 09/09/2021 09:21

You are not being unreasonable. If he doesn't like what you've offered him then he should make his own meal. What's wrong with a sandwich or a salad?

LalalalalalaLand123 · 09/09/2021 09:21

WTF OP
You're pandering to a grown man's idiotic preferences! Why???
It is perfectly normal to eat a meal more than once a week.
Why is he not preparing his own meals if he doesn't want the ones on offer? Have you teletransported back to the 1950s? What is going on here? Tell him to cook his own damn meals!

Thatsplentyjack · 09/09/2021 09:22

Well I wouldn't eat the same lunch or dinner 3 times in a row, but I wouldn't expect someone else to be making me an alternative so yanbu.

LuckyAmy1986 · 09/09/2021 09:23

TBH I wouldn't want to eat lasagna from the same batch three times in a week

How pathetic. We are far too pampered here aren’t we?!

Peanutsandchilli · 09/09/2021 09:24

Regardless of whether he eats the same meal twice in a week, I wouldn't be eating Monday's lasagne on Thursday, so I don't blame him for wanting something different. He's old enough to sort himself out though.

Sciurus83 · 09/09/2021 09:25

Do you serve him on bended knee without looking him in the eye for fear of offending him with your lowly status?! For the love of God don't check with his mummy.

IveGotASongThatllGetOnYNerves · 09/09/2021 09:26

Fuck that.
He can cook for himself or get his mummy to do it.

Laiste · 09/09/2021 09:27

Leftovers - yeah - i don't do them either. It's not that weird.

I cook enough food for however many i'm feeding. (max 6 adults + 1 DC but varies) Everything comes out of the saucepans or dish/dishes onto plates. At the end there's sometimes there's scraps from the plates into the bin but 9 times out of 10 all the food is actually gone.

IF there's ever leftovers it tends to be from home made soup (someone woofs that up within a day or two) or a v small amount of meat from a roast joint and that goes in DHs sandwiches next day.

I'm in charge of shopping and cooking and it is me that ''serves'' food in our house. I don't feel like a skivy?

I wouldn't cook or ''serve'' the same meal twice in a week so it's hard to say what would happen if i did. DH and DCs are always very appreciative and never moan.

Eddielzzard · 09/09/2021 09:27

Life's too short for this crap

Confusedandshaken · 09/09/2021 09:27

I can't believe you are actually asking us this. Are you a wife or a restaurant?

We have a fairly traditional household. DH earns the money, I take care of the house which means that I do 99% of the shopping and cooking. If DH ever had the gall to question what I put on the table because I'd had already served him that meal that week (or even that day) the dinner would be in the bin and he would be cooking his own meals until he apologised.

Excelthetube · 09/09/2021 09:31

this is actually really depressing.

Laiste · 09/09/2021 09:32

@Confusedandshaken

I can't believe you are actually asking us this. Are you a wife or a restaurant?

We have a fairly traditional household. DH earns the money, I take care of the house which means that I do 99% of the shopping and cooking. If DH ever had the gall to question what I put on the table because I'd had already served him that meal that week (or even that day) the dinner would be in the bin and he would be cooking his own meals until he apologised.

Yeah - this is it.

I'd be so gob smacked if DH questioned what i'd given him i'd think he was ill! Grin

SprayedWithDettol · 09/09/2021 09:33

What a load of nonsense. Let him fend for himself from now on. Why would anyone put up with this level of arsehattery?

Goldbar · 09/09/2021 09:34

He's an adult, he can sort himself out.

Fwiw, whenever I make chilli, it morphs into this giant potful. As a family of 3, we then eat it in various guises for half the week... on rice, jacket potatoes, in tacos. DH doesn't have an issue with that and is happy to help me to eat the chilli down. If he did have a problem, he knows how to use Deliveroo/ Just Eat.

Antsinyourpanta · 09/09/2021 09:34

I did a BBQ at the weekend and inadvertently cooked 6 million chicken drumsticks overcatered. I'm on my 3rd day of leftovers for pack lunch. It is slightly boring I will admit. (Lasagne is definitely not boring!!)
My DH choices are take it or leave it. Unfortunately he often chooses leave it but then makes himself something different and leaves the kitchen in chaos

Antsinyourpanta · 09/09/2021 09:36

Fwiw, whenever I make chilli, it morphs into this giant potful. As a family of 3, we then eat it in various guises for half the week... on rice, jacket potatoes, in tacos. DH doesn't have an issue with that and is happy to help me to eat the chilli down. If he did have a problem, he knows how to use Deliveroo/ Just Eat.

Sounds amazing, can I come round?Grin

waterlego · 09/09/2021 09:36

My DH has had the same meal three times this week. I made a huge batch at the start of the week because I knew I was going to be too busy to cook every day. He hasn't complained at all, and in fact has said several times how much he loves the dish I made.

thebabessavedme · 09/09/2021 09:37

WTF? We are pretty 'traditional' as a couple, I cook, dh eats what ever I put in front of him and thanks me for it! Occasionally, when I have tried something new we might decide together that is was not to our taste and I don't make again, he still thanks me for the effort made!

The day that stops happening is the day he starts to live on bacon sandwichs (the only thing he seems able to cook)

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