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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Neighbour issues!

150 replies

ShadowsInTheDarkness · 08/09/2021 11:13

Morning all.

Our cottage has a front path which runs past our front door and through our garden. It borders the back of some other cottages gardens and the cottage occupants have rights to access the path and use it for taking bins out, access etc. When we moved in we noticed that one cottage had a gate onto the path which was in disrepair, quite low and that their fence was falling down. We knew our dogs would be straight through it so we erected a post and chicken wire fence in our garden which ran alongside the path on our side. We can get onto the path via a gate and the neighbours have uninterrupted access to the path. We even placed the fence a foot or so further away from the path so that the access was wider than the path to make it easier to use.

Yesterday the neighbours called me over while I was outside. They have asked us to move the fence so that it runs further along, so they can more easily access their fence if the want to repair it. I agreed to this straight away, I have in no way been difficult about their access.

They have recently removed their hedge so that their garden now completely overlooks the path and our garden. The neighbours proceeded to point out that now the hedge is gone, our garden is their view, and that they would appreciate it if we could keep their view tidier. Specific things were pointed out such as a compost bag, a child's plastic chair that looked "dumped", some dogs toys and a bag of garden rubbish Id bagged up but not taken round to the bin yet. I was asked why we don't use the old green house which is a storage space and not used for growing (we have a larger one round the back of the garden!) and generally expected to hop to it and tidy up. The female neighbour "joked" that she would be doing an inspection later to check if I'd picked everything up.

I want to stress that these items were not up against the path, but in our garden. We generally keep the house and garden visitor ready but not immaculate as we are busy, and have a take us as you find us approach to visitors who pop round. We have livestock, DCs, dogs and both work/study full time. Our gardens are tidy and mowed but will inevitably have children's toys, feed sacks, hay and dog toys around.

So wwyd? DH wants to erect a solid fence pronto. I am avoiding going out there whilst also being tempted to pile up a load of pallets round there for storage and "accidentally" block their view!

There were also comments made about our dogs, chickens and ducks but as the birds are kept on part of our land that is not within sight of their "view" and a good distance away from them (nearly an acre) I'm inclined to ignore that. We aren't noisy or difficult neighbours and have always been very accommodating but this seems incredibly cheeky. Her justification for the request to keep the garden tidy was based on the fact that we "have all space" whilst they "only have this little bit". They are retired and sitting outside a lot at the moment with the nice weather so I'm hoping for rain soon!

Thoughts? Advice? How would you handle this? I will provide a diagram if requested 😁

OP posts:
Brollypackedforscottishholiday · 08/09/2021 13:49

I would be making their view a huge pile of manure....

ShadowsInTheDarkness · 08/09/2021 14:04

Diagram as requested

Neighbour issues!
OP posts:
Brollypackedforscottishholiday · 08/09/2021 14:06

The manure pile needs to be where you have written the word 'chat'..

earthyfire · 08/09/2021 14:10

I would be carrying on as usual, I wouldn't allow them to dictate to me but I would put up a fence for privacy.

MinnieGirl · 08/09/2021 14:17

@ShadowsInTheDarkness

Diagram as requested
Fabulous diagram! Personally, I would move the chicken wire fence to your exact boundary, which shouldn’t be hard. And then plant a fast growing hedge on your side. Much cheaper than putting up a fence, and you will get your wildlife back. And while the fence grows you can annoy your neighbours with a lovely lived in garden
Theboywiththearabstrap · 08/09/2021 14:19

I’d be building a 6ft concrete wall and spray painting it with the ugliest scene I could think of. Total CF

IntermittentParps · 08/09/2021 14:21

They can fuck off.

Why on earth did you pander to them by tidying the rubbish? And I wouldn’t bother calling the dogs in either.
Plant a new quick-growing hedge of some kind for the bees and birds. Otherwise, ignore them.

IntermittentParps · 08/09/2021 14:22

Oh, and pics of all pets and livestock please!

maddening · 08/09/2021 14:24

Put a solid fence on the boundary between the neighbour and the path with v narrow gate for them to access the path.

Rogue1001 · 08/09/2021 14:28

Impressive diagram. Extra points for use of colour.

TheSpottedZebra · 08/09/2021 14:29

@Brollypackedforscottishholiday

The manure pile needs to be where you have written the word 'chat'..
So much this. You have livestock, you must have muck.

You can even pretend that it is part of your grand plan to redo that area, enriching the soil and then later never planting pretties. That is, if you don't want to let your pettiness fly.

bicarbonateofcherrysoda · 08/09/2021 14:33

Lovely diagram!

poorbuthappy · 08/09/2021 14:33

You know we wanted drawing of actual chickens don't you? Grin

PurpleNebula84 · 08/09/2021 14:34

I absolutely LOVE your diagram - what has my life become, reading MN and getting excited at the mention of diagrams - and then to be over the moon when one is posted 🙈🙈😂😂
Re the neighbours - get that 6ft fence - they're completely CFers! There's no way I'd have tidied any of what they suggested - it's your garden and your space to do with as you like!

GunsNShips · 08/09/2021 14:35

Is all of the orange path yours? I think if you put a 6ft fence their it would definitely make it look like it wasn’t.

HotToddyColdSauvignon · 08/09/2021 14:42

@poorbuthappy

You know we wanted drawing of actual chickens don't you? Grin
I mean…. That was what I was hoping for Grin
bellabasset · 08/09/2021 14:47

So basically your ndn's want you to keep the part of your garden they can see to suit them. Perhaps just hedge that bit?

RincewindsHat · 08/09/2021 14:48

Gosh, you were very restrained not to told your neighbour that if they didn't like the view they were free to put their fence back up and by the way, thanks for also ruining your view too! How rude of them.

ShadowsInTheDarkness · 08/09/2021 14:55

@poorbuthappy

You know we wanted drawing of actual chickens don't you? Grin
Sorry, but only Maude would stand still for my sketching session. Please find attached pic of Maude. 3 years old, blonde, likes cucumber and long walks by the river.
Neighbour issues!
OP posts:
MummyMummy01 · 08/09/2021 14:58

There's a shortage of new fencing. You will need to use old doors various colours and stylesWink

LakieLady · 08/09/2021 14:58

They have recently removed their hedge so that their garden now completely overlooks the path and our garden. The neighbours proceeded to point out that now the hedge is gone, our garden is their view, and that they would appreciate it if we could keep their view tidier. Specific things were pointed out such as a compost bag, a child's plastic chair that looked "dumped", some dogs toys and a bag of garden rubbish Id bagged up but not taken round to the bin yet. I was asked why we don't use the old green house which is a storage space and not used for growing (we have a larger one round the back of the garden!) and generally expected to hop to it and tidy up. The female neighbour "joked" that she would be doing an inspection later to check if I'd picked everything up

Cheeky fuckers! I'd be telling them that if they don't like it, they're perfectly welcome to move to somewhere with tidier neighbours.

ShadowsInTheDarkness · 08/09/2021 14:58

@GunsNShips

Is all of the orange path yours? I think if you put a 6ft fence their it would definitely make it look like it wasn’t.
Yes all the path is ours. We have flower beds next to the house that border one side of the path which we maintain and I hope make it look very much like it's ours still. Their access is actually for all the path apart from the bit that's goes round the back of the house - so in through our front gate, past our front door and in the opposite direction to the parking area.
OP posts:
HotToddyColdSauvignon · 08/09/2021 15:05

Brilliant OP Grin what a happy chicken!

Now, back to that neighbour problem…

LakieLady · 08/09/2021 15:05

@tabulahrasa

I’d be getting an old mattress and some tyres and putting them out there...if I could get one a washing machine too, just really make it a mess.
And an old bathroom suite is always a good look. You could fill the bath with water and get some ducks to keep the chickens company, OP!

Maybe even an old car propped up on bricks and an old sofa, too...

GeorgiaGirl52 · 08/09/2021 15:06

@RocketPanda

Good fences make good neighbours. I wouldn't be able to relax in my garden if Mr and Mrs Busybody were looking in. Luckily my only neighbours are cows and donkeys.
Your DH is right. I have a walking trail that runs along the back of my back garden and I have a 6-foot high board solid fence up along the whole boundary. What I don't see doesn't bother me and what the dogs don't see doesn't start them barking!