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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Calling in sick on first day of new job

209 replies

Thepinkstuffing · 07/09/2021 22:50

I have my first day tomorrow, it’s in a school, working in the early years classroom as a general TA.
I started having signs of a UTI a few days ago, and today I rang the GP and managed to get a course of antibiotics.
I feel really crap though, I’ve only started them today, I’ve still got tummy pains, pelvic discomfort and the constant need to wee, although just a few drops come out.
If I’m still feeling this bad tomorrow, I may need to call in. I can’t keep running off to the toilet either, as I’ll be with the little ones.

I’m worried I’ll get fired on my first week the way things are going!
It’s so typical of me Sad

OP posts:
Fink · 08/09/2021 08:26

I had to go in with a really bad UTI once. It was a school trip day and the trip wouldn't have been able to run without me there. But I had to speak to my colleague who was driving the minibus and let him know that there would have to be wee breaks on the way. It was embarrassing and painful, but I just had to pop the painkillers and push on through. To be off work sick (especially during probation), you should be either a) infectious to others or b) really unable to get out of bed/function normally. It might seem harsh, but that's what the workplace is like. Especially in schools nowadays, where there's less and less slack in terms of colleagues who would be free to cover.

bendmeoverbackwards · 08/09/2021 08:30

that’s what the workplace is like

Because we’ve created this culture that you must work unless you’re at death’s door.

What a sorry state of affairs that work is so important and cannot function without you. If you’re ill you need to be at home resting to aid recovery. Don’t be a bloody martyr!

bendmeoverbackwards · 08/09/2021 08:31

OP it’s unfortunate but if you don’t feel well enough call them to apologise. Hope you feel better soon.

Aprilx · 08/09/2021 08:34

There are some circumstances when not turning up for work on the first day is unavoidable. But surely most people would make a bit more effort on the first day. OP has some discomfort and needs to wee more often, it doesn’t sound like a not turning up on first day type of illness.

Scautish · 08/09/2021 08:37

I think those suggesting she should just go in and muddle through have never had a proper UTI. They can be absolutely awful. You also have to watch the infection doesn’t go to kidneys which is far more serious.

OP I hope the antibiotics worked and you’re feeling better. As a sufferer of repeated UTIs I know what you’re going through.

NeverTalkToStrangers · 08/09/2021 08:38

A days worth of antibiotics should take the edge off it really quickly, and you'll continue to take them and recover tomorrow. You'll probably be OK to go in.

CallieOpie · 08/09/2021 08:40

If you aren't well enough to be able to work effectively, call in sick. If you are in charge of little people you need to be able to give them your full and clear attention. Any employer at a school should understand that.
I hope you feel better soon OP

NeverTalkToStrangers · 08/09/2021 08:43

This isn't a situation like some of the ones mentioned by PP where going in would make her worse or delay recovery or delay her seeking medical attention. In those situations she should definitely stay home.

In this situation I reckon if she's seeing improvement and she physically can go in, then she should.

Pollypudding · 08/09/2021 08:45

I hope you are feeling better today. As a manager I would be more irritated if you turned up unfit for work and then I had to make a decision about sending you home. I would respect that as an adult you can judge your own health and fitness to work.

JudgeRindersMinder · 08/09/2021 08:54

Difficult situation to be in, to stay off doesn’t exactly give a good impression, but last time I had a UTI I was throwing up every half hour,so based on that …..

Thanksihateit · 08/09/2021 08:56

*Would you take to your bed 🤣.

Op, I always carry Azo max strength tablets with me, they are a life saver, google them and have a packet in stock.*

What a bizarre comment. Are you saying UTIs aren’t something that can make you need to stay in bed? Some people are hospitalised with them.

ThorsLeftNut · 08/09/2021 09:00

I wouldn’t phone in sick for those symptoms.
Although on my second day in a new job I was sent home.
Is atleast try and if you really are that unwell then ask to leave early.

bendmeoverbackwards · 08/09/2021 09:06

@Aprilx

There are some circumstances when not turning up for work on the first day is unavoidable. But surely most people would make a bit more effort on the first day. OP has some discomfort and needs to wee more often, it doesn’t sound like a not turning up on first day type of illness.
@Aprilx it’s not for anyone else to judge if someone is well enough for work or not. We all feel things differently, different pain threshold etc.
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 08/09/2021 09:14

I would take pain relief and try to muddle through

OMG you've obviously never had cystitis.

Hope the antibiotics kick in quickly; drink loads of water and yes, I would at least show up. Even if you have to go home afterwards. The advice about incontinence pants is also a good tip. Good luck!

DarlingFell · 08/09/2021 09:19

I'd have to be dying to not go in on my first day, even my first few months. First impressions matter and as much as some (frankly not v stoic) posters tell you, 'you can't help being ill', 'value yourself', etc. you need to get yourself into work, you aren't desperately ill when all is said and done.

Antibiotics work v quickly on UTIs. You need pain killers and lots of water. And yes a tenalady for the 'little wees' Grin

BrilloPaddy · 08/09/2021 09:26

As an employer in a small business, I'd expect someone to be very seriously unwell to phone in sick on their 1st day.

ie Not for a UTI that's being treated Hmm

3scape · 08/09/2021 09:31

Lol to the just go in anyway. When I've had an actual.uti (not just the starting pain) I've not been able to focus my eyes consistently or comfortably walk. But yes, just rock up (driving) and sweat, puke and sway over some kids and freak them all out.

Even more lol to the advice to get antibiotics sooner, yeah, I'm sure the op will get right on that time travel.

Mummy7777 · 08/09/2021 09:35

@CornishTiger

I've had a bad uti to the point where I was losing blood and needed antibiotics at the hospital. I've also had sepsis so I know the difference between unable to work and working but not at normal pace.

NeverTalkToStrangers · 08/09/2021 09:37

Only a very ignorant woman would deny that UTIs can be very serious and incapacitating (and yes there are a couple of them on this thread) . But the OP's symptoms aren't that bad and three/four/five doses of antibiotics should make them significantly better - they certainly won't get worse.

Hope you're feeling better now OP, whether or not you felt well enough to go in.

Rangoon · 08/09/2021 09:39

The idea that it is mild discomfort for a true UTI is just mind boggling. I was prone to them at one stage and the pain was just unbelievable and I literally couldn't be more than a few feet from the loo. I would endure almost anything rather than have another attack and that includes orthopaedic surgery where my bones were sawed and screwed into place. I keep a supply of broad spectrum antibiotics on hand for UTIs at all times.

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 08/09/2021 09:39

I hope you did manage to get in today.

The only time I had to call in sick was on a trial day - I had taken DS1 to hospital because he had abdo pain (he was 2 1/2) and was limp and feverish - and while there, I was taken ill as well with D&V. Turned out to be a highly infectious adenovirus, that started with DS1, went through me, my DH, MIL and BIL (who lived with her) in less than 48h.
I called in to say I couldn't make it in because I was in hospital - they said "OK, well this isn't going to work out, don't bother coming back".

Lovely! Angry OK, it was only a part time job in a retail outlet but still!

ThanksIGotItInMorrisons · 08/09/2021 09:41

Drink lots and lots of water. Flush it out.

Thanksihateit · 08/09/2021 09:43

As an employer in a small business, I'd expect someone to be very seriously unwell to phone in sick on their 1st day. ie Not for a UTI that's being treated hmm

Maybe you should trust other humans to decide on how well they feel, instead of judging them by your standards. Do you think all UTIs are the same, and all respond perfectly to antibiotics?

bendmeoverbackwards · 08/09/2021 09:46

@ThumbWitchesAbroad you had a lucky escape there! Good luck to them finding and retaining staff.

Why don’t people value themselves enough not to be a martyr to their employers?

todaysdilemma · 08/09/2021 09:53

Hi OP, I hope you did go in. UTIs can be very painful but antiobiotics over a whole day should certainly alleviate it. But I'm very surprised you waited a few days to go to the GP for treatment given you had symptoms much earlier? If you have had UTIs before, and know how they escalate, and you're starting a new job on a certain day, why didn't you ring the GP as soon as the symptoms kicked in - so you'd start treatment asap. It's one thing if it started the day before work, but to know you need antibiotics and delay asking for them till the last minute for no reason, seems a bit odd.