Calling in sick on first day of new job

[Thepinkstuffing]

I have my first day tomorrow, it’s in a school, working in the early years classroom as a general TA.
I started having signs of a UTI a few days ago, and today I rang the GP and managed to get a course of antibiotics.
I feel really crap though, I’ve only started them today, I’ve still got tummy pains, pelvic discomfort and the constant need to wee, although just a few drops come out.
If I’m still feeling this bad tomorrow, I may need to call in. I can’t keep running off to the toilet either, as I’ll be with the little ones.

I’m worried I’ll get fired on my first week the way things are going!
It’s so typical of me

If I has one day off for being genuinely unwell with an infection in one of my organs, and my employer held it against me, I wouldn’t want to work there. A kind, supportive employer would think ‘what a shame, hope OP feels better when the antibiotics in and is back tomorrow.’

OP is clearly a conscientious and thoughtful person which is why she’s in a dilemma. But her health is the priority, not buying incontinence pads and forcing herself in

Hope you’re feeling better.

UTIs are horrible. I’ve had several accompanied by bleeding, severe kidney pain and vomiting and fever. So it depends really. They are a concern because they are one of the infections that can lead to sepsis which is why they will give antibiotics for them basically without question.
On a first day at work I would genuinely have struggled because I was crying with the pain and I don’t think I’m a wimp. I had appendicitis as an adult and that was less painful tbh!
So it depends. There are degrees of them. I generally find that after a day or so the antibiotics help and also that disgusting over the counter stuff sometimes helps too.

They are miserable though, you have my sympathy!

I would be worse than useless at anything with a UTI, I get them from time to time and absolutely cannot think straight for the pain and concern about not making it to the loo in time.

I've regularly peed blood and once had to get an emergency doctor out as I was curled up on a hotel bathroom floor in agony. Even in milder cases I struggle to sit up straight and therefore drive.

Nobody is saying that calling in sick on day 1 is ideal but if OP isn't fit to do the job today than she's not and that's that. She can't be sacked for it, and there's no reason to suspect she'd fail probation so long as the rest of her performance is good.

TBH I'd be more worried about grimacing through it on day 1 and then having to call in on day 2 if it doesn't improve. Surely that would look worse?

What the hell am I reading here? Post after post of people urging a woman to go to work when she's suffering an infection? Are we really so beaten down into submission/obedience by work culture?

@queenatom

Been there and it's a horrible dilemma - was struck down with D+V the night before starting a new job but obviously didn't want to miss the first day. Ended up loading myself up with Immodium and eating nothing to minimise the chances of puking. I made it through the day, though not sure how!

And you probably passed D&V around your new workplace. Incredibly selfish as well as stupid.

@Ohsoquietchange

Surely early years won’t be in for the full day? Locally it’s 2 weeks of half days before they even do a full day…. This year early years are in for an hour! UTIs are horrendous but soldier through it…. Parecetomal and Ibro… and the antibiotics will kick in

It's often different groups in for different hours though. So there might be one group in the morning and one group in the afternoon. That's one of the reasons for the settling in period - that the staff can provide more 1 to 1 attention.

"Don't even think about staying off"

Mumsnet is so dramatic.

OP, we are human, things happen that are out of our control. If you are sick and in pain call and tell them, get a doctors note if that makes you feel more comfortable to take in when you go back. The people that you work with are also human and will have faced similar situations in their careers.

This feels like a massive thing right now but just say to yourself: in a years time will I still be worrying and stressing about this? No! You'll have forgotten all about it and will be enjoying your new job.

I forced myself to go to the first day of a new job in tears all the way there because everyone told me I needed to. I had just said "bye, see you in a few hours" to someone very close to me who was very ill. They died while I was at work and I never got to say goodbye.

Your situation is obviously different, but it has taught me that you get one life on this earth and work is just work and that everyone is human.

It's awful timing but if you feel that bad then don't go in, if the school isn't anything other than completely understanding would you want to work for them anyway?

@EishetChayil

What the hell am I reading here? Post after post of people urging a woman to go to work when she's suffering an infection? Are we really so beaten down into submission/obedience by work culture?

My thoughts exactly!

@queenatom

Been there and it's a horrible dilemma - was struck down with D+V the night before starting a new job but obviously didn't want to miss the first day. Ended up loading myself up with Immodium and eating nothing to minimise the chances of puking. I made it through the day, though not sure how!

You really shouldn’t be going to work with V&D. Why would you go to work when you’ve got something that is almost certainly contagious?

Schools have a 48 hour policy for V&D, if the OP had that then she should get in more trouble for going in than she would for staying at home.

People who have mild discomfort at a uti are very lucky.

For me I would rather be in labour.
I've never cried at an illness bar this.

Pain killers do not work when I have a uti and working with kids all day isnt going to take your mind off it. You have to have high energy and be vigilant.

Ahh this is so hard , I always feel guilty for having a day off , and I'm self employed haha. This culture is so embedded in us . Personally the anxiety of not going in would make me feel sicker so I would go in xx

@EishetChayil

What the hell am I reading here? Post after post of people urging a woman to go to work when she's suffering an infection? Are we really so beaten down into submission/obedience by work culture?

On your first day, yep!

Op how are you feeling?

@EishetChayil

What the hell am I reading here? Post after post of people urging a woman to go to work when she's suffering an infection? Are we really so beaten down into submission/obedience by work culture?

I’ve been saying this. It’s so, so, depressing. Are these people admitting they’d be judgy and critical if someone did this at their workplace?

And those who say ‘I went in with a UTI and managed’ - they’re all different. I’ve been to work with a mild UTI. And I’ve been left absolutely bedbound by one where I was peeing blood with a sky high temperature. Are some people not intelligent to realise that not everyone feels illnesses in the same way?

On your first day, yep!

Why? Do ‘first days’ imbue you with the power to not feel unwell when one of your key organs is full of bacteria?

I would go in as well and muddle through. Antibiotics can work very quickly and you may find your ok anyway. I’m afraid it wouldn’t look good.

You'll feel better once the antibiotics kick in. I wouldn't call in sick on my first day unless I was literally in hospital on a drip. It might be wrong but unfortunately that's capitalism for you.

I would go in. I get a lot of UTI’s and they are truly awful but I think I would try and go in to work if it was my first day. Hopefully the antibiotics will kick in soon and your symptoms will lessen, sometimes it only takes a day, other times it takes 3. Keeping everything crossed for you OP as I know how it feels. I remember sitting in a meeting and having to keep going to the loo, I was passing blood and eventually I had to tell my boss and leave, I got antibiotics that day and they kicked in pretty quickly but I felt unwell for a few days.

Good grief. People are actually suggesting the OP essentially wears nappies in case she needs to wet herself.

I hope you've called in sick, and if there is a bad reaction from your manager, that would give me pause for thought about working there, anyway.

@Thanksihateit

On your first day, yep!

Why? Do ‘first days’ imbue you with the power to not feel unwell when one of your key organs is full of bacteria?

Would you take to your bed 🤣.

Op, I always carry Azo max strength tablets with me, they are a life saver, google them and have a packet in stock.

I found taking paracetamol alongside the ABs really helped with the pain.

I went into work on my second day feeling like I had flu, and was sent home after lunch! At least they knew I was really ill!

I’m surprised so many people are urging the OP to go in at all costs. I agree extra effort is expected on a first day, but there have to be limits. If I subsequently found out a new colleague had bought themselves period pants so they could continue passing urine because it was the only way they could get through the day I’d be shocked.

What I really don’t understand are those posters who say you can’t miss a first day as this will never, ever be forgotten, even if you prove an excellent worker and never have another sick day. That attitude is clearly absolutely bonkers. Not denying it’s out there, as evidenced on this thread, but it’s irrational.

I think it's pretty off to be judging people who would call in sick as well as those who felt they couldn't or shouldn't do that, tbh.

Neither is helpful, nor is a workplace culture where you are genuinely unwell and worrying about whether to call in sick or not and/or feeling like you have to go in.

Hopefully the OP is tucked up in bed asleep but if still wondering, I would call in and arrange to push back my start date.

UTIs are horrid but the antibiotics should kick in fairly quickly. I’d dose up with painkillers for the first day and she how you get on. If you get a fever or back pain then I’d go see the GP same day and miss work, but otherwise I’d at least try and work as the antibiotics should be kicking in now.