Not to offer the photographers a wedding breakfast?

[realteal]

Just wondering if this is cheeky or not. Maybe this is the done thing and I don’t know about it!

We are hoping to get married next year. There will be one photographer and his assistant. Their photos are great to be fair and we are very happy to have booked them.

We’ve just got the contract through. They have asked us to order two wedding breakfasts that they will eat in a side room.

AIBU to think this is a bit cheeky? We are paying them a four figure sum. Why can’t they bring a flask, a lunch bag and a packet of crisps like everyone else who goes out to work?!

Is this a common request?

We used to be suppliers. We never asked to be fed and always had a packed lunch in the car, however if it was offered we were very grateful.
It wasn't common to be offered a meal, let alone a soft drink tab - maybe twice in 5yrs?

I personally think it's cheeky to ask. The venue employees aren't being fed at your expense so why would a photographer assume they should be to?

@NewPapaGuinea

I irrationally find the term “wedding breakfast” annoying 😆

It's just the first meal of your marriage, that's why it's the breakfast. You are breaking your virgin fast 😀

@NewPapaGuinea

I irrationally find the term “wedding breakfast” annoying 😆

So do I and we definitely won’t be having one (if I can even be arsed having a wedding after all) 😂🤣🤣

** Sorry, but I'm with the OP. Nice to be offered, but cheeky to ask.

So if you have a tradesman working at your house all day, he should be fed?**

^This. If you have to fed them make sure they aren’t sat with the guests

In my experience it's normal over a certain number of hours' coverage. When are they arriving and leaving?

I normally request a modest bar meal. I cannot lug all my equipment around, as well as food. I don't ever expect a full guest meal but a hot meal and a drink is very much appreciated. It's hard physical work and you often don't have anywhere you can safely store food and drink. For a 12 hour day, I promise you it's not cheeky ask!

Photographers really are mickey takers. You pay them thousands and even after that you have to get permission to use the photos however you want. I wouldn’t give my electrician or cleaner a sit down meal..

We paid for our photographer to have just the main course of our meal, it was part of her contract. DH is still annoyed about it😂I think it's just expected tbh.

You have already shared your wedding and how you are treating potential employees at your wedding, with over a million mumsnet viewers.

I suggest that any creative staff you employ take photographs of the pathetic and paltry food you will be offering for the day whilst they are working so hard and they put it on their blog.

The internet works both ways.

You want to be a Bridezilla and not care about how other people feel.

They are perfectly entitled to do the same.

Your attitude is disgraceful.

Take your own photographs.

We fed ours. It's only 2 meals.

Yep normal. Although I'm not sure why... I get your point about most other jobs not providing employees lunch.

I am rather surprised at so many people saying this is standard!

Gotta love MN.

Perhaps that's because it is. I just checked with a friend who manages a hotel often used for weddings and she says it's standard though in her hotel, supplier meals are usually somewhat cheaper and often eaten elsewhere.

Mine didn't request it but I provided him with a meal and drink anyway.

Completely normal and a standard in a lot of wedding contracts.

@beigebrownblue

You have already shared your wedding and how you are treating potential employees at your wedding, with over a million mumsnet viewers.

I suggest that any creative staff you employ take photographs of the pathetic and paltry food you will be offering for the day whilst they are working so hard and they put it on their blog.

The internet works both ways.

You want to be a Bridezilla and not care about how other people feel.

They are perfectly entitled to do the same.

Your attitude is disgraceful.

Take your own photographs.

There’s no need to be so rude. The photographers ‘work hard’ but they’re being paid a lot of money to do so. They’re not doing OP a favour and don’t ‘deserve’ to be fed. It’s just easier depending on the flow of the event.

I never understand the point in saying that you don't feed this person or that. Different jobs have different requirements and "perks". I've never worked in a job where I got tips but I don't complain about waiting staff getting them. I have however worked in a few jobs where my employers fed me on a semi-regular basis.

We had a la carte for our wedding so it never even occurred to me to invite the photographer.

You are paying a 4 figure sum and affronted by a meal!?

We paid similar and of course didn't question giving them food or the band later.

What if they don't want sandwiches at lunchtime and for dinner as they have to stay and do speeches dance etc.... or maybe u prefer them to pop off and cook in a campervan and miss said photos...

Come on think it through ... how do you want their time spent...?

It's absolutely normal to feed the photographer. They're being very reasonable to agree to eat in a side room!

Does your employer feed you?!

Yes, if I’m away from the office. Technically I buy it and claim it back on expenses after. If I go away for work, I expect them to pay for my breakfast and my evening meal. If I go to an all day conference, I would expect there to be a lunch to be provided by whoever is hosting the conference. Self employed people will often state that the costs of hiring them includes expenses which can include food and subsistence.

Yes, it’s standard. It’s also rude to not feed someone who is working in your behalf all day. Our photographers asked for bar snacks rather than a full meal and asked to be separate to just have a break for a bit. All perfectly reasonable.

For mine, the photographer and band can order something at the bar in the afternoon, and they're counted in the numbers for the evening food.

Wedding coordinator here 🙋‍♀️ very standard and very normal. Not required for other suppliers e.g. florist, DJ, etc. but definitely for photographers.

Sorry - I should add - it's normally just the main from the wedding breakfast. The full 3 course meal is cheeky.

@NewPapaGuinea - it's the correct terminology