Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Why do adults have ‘themed’ parties???

126 replies

HarryDresdensLeatherDuster · 04/09/2021 20:36

Seriously? I am not talking about 20/30 somethings but really grown up people in their 50s and 60s. Why have they not realised that so many people hate this sort of thing? Two invitations to parties today to events I would genuinely love to attend but they are both ‘themed’. Why? Why? I struggle enough to find clothes I want to wear to such things. Why do I want to dress up in clothes from my teens???
And yes, before you start, I realise how lucky I am to be invited…

OP posts:
Lockheart · 04/09/2021 20:37

Presumably because they want to.

HerRoyalRisesAgain · 04/09/2021 20:39

Erm... because they want to? Being grown up doesnt stop you from wanting to enjoy yourself. What a miserable existence it would be if it did

JaffaRaf · 04/09/2021 20:40

Because it’s their party that they are paying for and they find it fun, obviously. Those who don’t find it fun don’t need to attend, so no harm done. Whats wrong with people enjoying life how they see fit?

Sparklesocks · 04/09/2021 20:40

Because they enjoy them? Radical I know…

haroldbaker · 04/09/2021 20:41

Ugh I have no idea but fancy dress is my worst nightmare and I'd rather not go! I appreciate I'm a total misery though!

trumpisagit · 04/09/2021 20:41

Go to the party - make minimal effort on the theme (eg hat or top colour). Enjoy the party.

MedusasBadHairDay · 04/09/2021 20:41

Because they like it? 🤷‍♀️

And I'd assume some of their other guests enjoy it too. I suspect it'd be fairly difficult to plan a party that absolutely everyone likes, you'll always have someone who doesn't like whatever you plan.

bathorshower · 04/09/2021 20:41

I'd say it depends on the theme - I'm going to one soon with the theme 'opulence' which isn't too difficult; I'd be a lot less keen on, say, 70's. Also, I can look opulent without looking ridiculous; 70's less so....

JudgeRindersMinder · 04/09/2021 20:42

Because they think it makes them windswept and interesting. It doesn’t, it’s my idea of the 7th circle of hell

Shodan · 04/09/2021 20:45

Because they think it makes them windswept and interesting.

What, like Kate Bush?? I doubt it.

They probably just think it's a bit of fun, which isn't a bad thing.

If you don't like their type of fun, don't go. If you do, go.

It's not difficult.

Funnylittlefloozie · 04/09/2021 20:47

I love a good fancy dress party!

If you really hate it, just don't go.

XenoBitch · 04/09/2021 20:48

YABU to think that older people should just engage in normal and boring things and not want to inject a bit of fun onto their lives.
I would prefer to go to a themed party tbh. Sounds like good fun.

Annoyedanddissapointed · 04/09/2021 20:48

Age has nothing to do with this. Themed parties aren't something you must stop at 40🤷🏻
If you don't like it, don't go.

WhyOhWhyOhWhyyyy · 04/09/2021 20:51

By themed do you mean fancy dress? If so, YANBU, I really resent having to find/create a specific outfit, I have enough on my to do list.

Original poster
HarryDresdensLeatherDuster · 04/09/2021 20:53

Re: 'because they want to' type answers - well obviously! Best you could think of?
Re: 'because they want to have fun' - what, you can't have fun without looking stupid? That's up there with the idea of being unable to have fun without drink/drugs etc

One event is one of my closest friend's wedding anniversary. I will of course go because she is incredibly important to me. The other is a big birthday for a member of my son's partner's family and I would love to go but my heart sinks when I hear the word 'themed'.

OP posts:
BobMortimersPetOwl · 04/09/2021 20:54

Fancy dress gets on my tits! I'm not into gimmicky crap though, I'd rather just have a get together with good music, good food and decent drinks.

HerRoyalRisesAgain · 04/09/2021 20:55

Just because it's not your idea of fun diesnt mean it's not theirs. Fun is subjective. They clearly think it's fun while you think it's ridiculous.

Lockheart · 04/09/2021 20:56

Re: 'because they want to' type answers - well obviously!

Hey, you're the one who had to ask.

Original poster
HarryDresdensLeatherDuster · 04/09/2021 20:56

I genuinely do not get why you would have a party that makes a number of people that you invite, and therefore presumably want to attend, feel like running for the hills.

And why is a party 'boring' if it's not fancy dress?

OP posts:
Mysterian · 04/09/2021 20:56

Keeps all the miserable fuckers away.

freelions · 04/09/2021 20:56

Because they think it will be fun I assume

If you're not a fan of full on fancy dress then you could just wear an accessory or two that fits the theme

Or just don't go if you really don't think you'll enjoy yourself

Original poster
HarryDresdensLeatherDuster · 04/09/2021 20:57

I was interested in the thinking behind it Lockheart.

OP posts:
Mycatismadeofstringcheese · 04/09/2021 20:57

If you’re not into the theme turn up in your normal clothes but with a hat or headpiece that matches the theme.

Then take it off after 10 minutes (you can always say it’s too hot / uncomfortable/ broken) and crack on and enjoy yourself.

Sparklesocks · 04/09/2021 20:57

Some people really like those sorts of parties, some don’t. But clearly your friends do or they wouldn’t be throwing them. So if you frame it as some unknowable question clearly you’re going to get those sorts of silly answers? If you don’t like them fine, but others clearly do.

HerRoyalRisesAgain · 04/09/2021 20:58

I genuinely do not get why you would have a party that makes a number of people that you invite, and therefore presumably want to attend, feel like running for the hills.

Well considering people attend these parties they probably think they enjoy them as much as the hosts do.
Don't like it, don't go. Simple.