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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to think this is a well known scam?

265 replies

EvaRoad · 30/08/2021 20:15

....or have I just been unlucky? (Name changed as too outing)

At the end of July my girlfriend dropped her phone and it broke "beyond repair". She was distraught, did not know what she was going to do and needed a new phone. I suggested she asked her friends or asked her family but ultimately she made it clear that if I didn't get her a phone then she would not be able to contact me anymore. I was in a difficult position, her birthday was coming up, so I eventually relented and purchased her a new phone on a contract. Anyway, I never got to see the phone, as she kept on making excuses not to see me, and then last week she said she had "got back with her ex", didn't want to see me again, and blocked me. Obviously she's still got the phone and I've now got to pay for the rest of the contract.

What really gets me is that this is the second time this has happened to me, my previous girlfriend did something similar, breaking up with me within a few weeks of getting her a new phone a couple of years back.

So is this a well known scam, or have I just been unlucky? Do girls really drop their phones as often as they say?

OP posts:
LadyCatStark · 30/08/2021 20:42

Report it as stolen now before she runs up any massive bills. They’ll block the phone not the sim so she won’t be able to use it.

Grullghj · 30/08/2021 20:42

Why aren’t you asking for it to be returned back to you? Don’t be a mug. Ask for it to be returned

Original poster
EvaRoad · 30/08/2021 20:43

Fortunately she can't run up massive bills as I have the "real" SIM card.

OP posts:
Aprilx · 30/08/2021 20:44

No I don’t think it is a “well known scam”, as it seems rather excessive to build a relationship with someone simply to get a new phone. Nevertheless you have been a bit of a mug. If somebody told me that they could not see me unless I bought them a new phone, then they wouldn’t see me.

Aprilx · 30/08/2021 20:44

@EvaRoad

Fortunately she can't run up massive bills as I have the "real" SIM card.
What does that even mean?
Original poster
EvaRoad · 30/08/2021 20:45

I can't ask for it back as it was "a gift", freely given.

OP posts:
SunbathingDragon · 30/08/2021 20:45

Even without the SIM card, the phone can be blocked so it is useless to her.

SheldonesqueTheBstard · 30/08/2021 20:46

Get it bastard back.

Grullghj · 30/08/2021 20:47

Of course you can ask for it back. You just don’t want to. So stop moaning about it.

Chloemol · 30/08/2021 20:47

If the contacts in your name cancel it.

JulesCobb · 30/08/2021 20:47

@EvaRoad

I can't ask for it back as it was "a gift", freely given.
Its wasnt though. It was a condition of the relationship ask for it back. Of not block it. Dont be a martyr
FoodIsOnMyMind · 30/08/2021 20:48

Get it blocked.
Ask for it back
Report to Police.

TartanJumper · 30/08/2021 20:49

If the contract is in your name, then can you get her phone cancelled/blocked and a new one sent to you if you explain to the provider?
Still annoying you'd have to pay, but at least she's not benefitting from it.

And if there is a next time, tell them to buy their own phone.

FoodIsOnMyMind · 30/08/2021 20:49

If you never got to see the phone. How have you got the sim out of it?

GCrebel · 30/08/2021 20:49

But the question was very much phrased along the lines that I had to show I was serious.

Why? A relationship, especially a relatively new relationship should be fun. Being serious isn't demonstrated through financial extortion. I'm afraid you have been financially abused.

Sparklfairy · 30/08/2021 20:50

No, i don't think there's a subreddit somewhere where women congregate with ideas of how to scam unsuspecting partners Grin

Clearly this is a pattern though. I mean this kidney, but you have "mug" stamped on your forehead.

Are you trying to buy the affections of women? This leaves you open to being used.

Fwiw I'm on (I think) my 4th phone in 2 years. I'm clumsy. I would never dream of anyone else replacing them though!

TartanJumper · 30/08/2021 20:50

*EvaRoad
Fortunately she can't run up massive bills as I have the "real" SIM card.

What does that even mean?*

I think it means that the phone number associated with the contract isn't the one being used with the phone?

MrsBumm · 30/08/2021 20:51

Did you get the phone within the last 14 days? As if so you can cancel under cooling off period.

Sparklfairy · 30/08/2021 20:51

Kindly not kidney Grin

lawofdistraction · 30/08/2021 20:51

You didn't see the phone but you have its sim? Did she send you the sim?

ghostyslovesheets · 30/08/2021 20:53

You sound like a lovely person OP - I'd love to comfort you - I need you to send me £500 for tickets so I can - thanks hun x

ghostyslovesheets · 30/08/2021 20:54

I mean this kidney - honestly I think you need a bit more of a build up before asking for organs

PearlyRising · 30/08/2021 20:54

@WhoUsedMyName

Report it as stolen Confused don't buy people phones. Your welcome
But she took the actual sim that's linked to the contract out of the phone and the new phone has the xgf's existing sim in it.

@EvaRoad i know this won't happen to you again, you sound like your boundaries have really been pushed so far but it's not a reasonable thing, to demand that your bf/gf buys you a phone. Before covid, when I was out with my bf, I dropped my phone down the toilet! and he helped me dry it out! with rice. It came back to life. I wouldn't have dreamed of telling my bf to buy me a phone!!!

Do you have that thing going on where you feel you have to ''sing for your supper'' in a relationship? Where you chase after people who allow themselves to be bought? Most people don't want to be for sale.

There's a difference between being spontaneously generous when it's your choice and feeling like your arm was twisted!

BeenAsFarAsMercyAndGrand · 30/08/2021 20:55

@Rocktheboat87

I can't use the worlds I want to use to describe her but she is a horrible person. She sadly used you to get the phone and now has lost interest. If it's still with-in 14 days I'd be tempted to cancel her contract. You could even go so far as to tell her parents what she has done and hopefully the vengeance of the parents will make her do what's right.
Wtf have her parents got to do with it.

OP - you've been gullible. Twice. Get the SIM blocked, and learn from this next time.

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 30/08/2021 20:55

If someone is asking you to prove you're serious about them by buying something expensive ,then they aren't serious about you at all.

What did she do to prove she was serious about you?