To say yes, I am a part of this village?

[draghimtothemits]

I recently joined the local village FB group having recently moved here.

I asked a question about what local hospital people generally used since it isn't clear which one is the local one.

A few responses there, then a woman asked 'where are you then dear'. I explained I was in one of the new build houses at the back.

The responses are out there! 6 different people falling over themselves to say I'm NOT a part of the village.

One comment said 'that's not x village, that's the outskirts'

I said my address is this very village. He replied 'no, that simply isn't possible'

Another response said 'you're not one of us! You should be banned'. Granted, that comment for a few laughing face reactions, but not a soul has come on to say that yes, I am a part of the village.

AIBU to think I am a part of the village?!

We also done some building work under 'permitted development', all above board and legal.
Same neighbour informed me we needed planning permission, oh heard and popped his head out stating we didn't as the height of the roof was under 3.5m, she replied 3m wss limit, he replied "its 3.5m for a double pitch, now get off my property Hyacinth" .

Next day dogs going mad at front door, neighbours and her husband measuring up with tape measure.....

Ah the joys of village FB groups.

I find dog poo, fireworks and traffic complaints are the hot topics.

the town up the road facebook group had loads of people saying how much they loved it there, having moved from croydon, or similar

that is what you need to do to ingratiate yourself op, say how much you love the community

@AwFeebs

Ah the joys of village FB groups.

I find dog poo, fireworks and traffic complaints are the hot topics.

We're bombarded with photos of membersof the parish council doing good deeds round the village. As soon as one appeals, its competition time for them all

@Marmitemarinaded its not brown nosing, its fitting in.

I live in a town and our fb page is quite entertaining. ‘Anyone know why a helicopter just flew past’ and ‘Is this cat lost?’ With picture of cat in someone’s garden, feature regularly. Because all cats are lost.

[quote Rubyupbeat]@Marmitemarinaded its not brown nosing, its fitting in.[/quote]
But why would she went to fit in with such an obnoxious and unwelcoming community?!

And “fitting in”…. Why should you have to “fit I “ to be welcomed by a community.

That’s what made the community where I lived In London so brilliant

There was no “fitting in”. You were accepted for who you were

We're surrounded by lovely country houses just like the one we live in. The difference is - we rent. The locals can't STAND it! Our neighbours, otherwise quite faux nice take every opportunity to shoehorn it in with new people to the village. 'Oh, Guy is having a party. He's having his garden redone. Of course Bortles RENTS so you wouldn't do that would you Bortles?'
Villages are weird. It's not even young people who might have the excuse of being immature. It's people in their 50s and 60s many of whom are relentless social-climbing snobs.

Sounds like my parents village, anyone who has moved there in the last 30 (maybe even 50) years is considered ‘new’ and met with suspicion. Don’t pander to them with litter picks of what they consider to be the village. Keep your own estate nice and build a lovely community there. They will soon start to include you when they realise that without new builds on the periphery of their village, there won’t be any young people at the schools or keeping local shops open as families are priced out of their exclusive central village district.

@draghimtothemits

The thing is this, the land was part of the village before the houses were put there so it isn't a new bit of area being added on

What makes me laugh is there are a few big country houses just on the actual outskirts, mentioned this and someone replied straight away?! To say yes they are part of the village! But the address doesn't even have the village name in it at all and a different post code?

Where you live now used to be fields. The people on the edge of the village used to have nice views and now they have a view of houses. They bought their house and loved it because of the view. They're mourning their loss. They've had months, possibly years, of noise and building work and mess and disruption and cement mixers going past their front door when it used to be lovely and quiet. And their homes have lost value — because a house with a garden backing onto fields is so much nicer than a house that's overlooked by another property. You may well feel the same way they do in 20 years time when the next estate is built at the end of your garden.

We moved into a village (although not a new build estate! )

We’ve found that most people are absolutely fine and normal, happy to be nice to new people, but a minority of people can be really, really weird about who - or where - counts as being a proper part of the village.

There was one post on the village FB page recently where some poor woman was being flamed for daring to say that she was proud of coming from the village.
Her crime was to have confessed that her parents hadn’t moved into the village until she was a week old. 65 years ago!
Certain people were incensed that she’d claimed to be a proper villager when she had lived somewhere else first (for a week at most!!). The whole thing was totally bizarre

@draghimtothemits my comment wasn’t a criticism of you AT ALL, they are being awful to you and you have every right to use local services from shops to GPS.

If they have an issue with local services they need to take that up with whoever they voted in.

You didn’t set planning or resources, and you asking re local hospital details should have ended with the information given.

I see how my sloppily message read and for the shoddy treatment.

Perhaps the OP should just regard the new estate as their 'village' and treat it accordingly. Form a new community there without all the BS of normal village life! If it goes well, nobody will give a hoot what the 'villagers' think.

Jeez......do people actually behave like this? Does it matter whether you live in the village or are 6 foot outside the boundary as to whether you can join in with questions about services and the communities within your area? I’m so glad I don’t live amongst people that are so far up their arses. All the crap in the world at the moment and people really froth at the mouth about someone who doesn’t technically live within the boundaries of ‘their’ village?

I think that you are making it far too big a deal. Its just Facebook, I can pretty much guarantee that you had people also on your post being nice to you too. It does seem to come across that you don't really want to be there OP, you won't go to local playground, you aren't using the school or the GP (obviously for your good reasons). The Scarecrow competitions are just a bit of fun and won't your child enjoy seeing your scarecrow in the garden? Knowing its his (or his mums work). If you haven't got time to do it, how about asking some friends over with ideas?. Honestly a mophead would do with a mask, It doesn't have to be amazing.........................

@AwFeebs

Ah the joys of village FB groups.

I find dog poo, fireworks and traffic complaints are the hot topics.

And parking!

@BrilloPaddy

We've got an official FB page where people write crap about how wonderful the village shop is (run by the village idiot and his simpering idiot wife); the WI meetings and the Parish council. It's vomit inducing.

Then someone started a "Spotted X" page and it's great. Rants about hooligan teenagers on bikes (there are about 3), dog shit, cat shit, and noise at 7pm. It gets some really funny comments on most of the time, and the ubiquitous "which takeaway delivers out here" to which the answer is always "none, it's the backarse of nowhere".

Start an unofficial one and have some fun with it

Our official FB is always populated by the same few who rant about about fireworks, dognapping, visitors (never locals) littering or not clearing up after dogs, Eastern European men in white vans chalking on pavements, cars parked outside their houses on public street, what time does post office open, is there a food bank locally, (virtue signalling) why is PTA, Scouts, church, local Council etc run by “newcomers “ when born and bred people know better how to do stuff. Colonel blimps resurrecting planning permissions given several years ago and suggesting protest groups. People demanding local privately owned properties should be turned into free car parks, restaurants, supermarkets, etc. without reference to the owners. Demanding M&S or Waitrose move into empty properties.

Hot Fuzz 😱

@MrsSkylerWhite

Hot Fuzz 😱

Yes - brilliant documentary!

DM has lived in her house for 35 years, and is still “an incomer” because it’s an (old) new build. People who moved in five years ago but into an older house (still 1960s!) are apparently fine 🤷‍♀️

People in villages can be weird, especially about planning issues.

Ugh, one of the very reasons I'd never live in a village. What a load of shite

My local fb village group are always taking the piss out of the people on the new development. Never said yet they are not part of the village but it's clear they are resented for living in houses a developer bought which used to be a village walking area. Ignore the eejits

Ah yes, never the locals.

Apparently during lockdown, the residents of Bishops Stortford realised that the Facebook rants about non-local airport users parking badly in residential areas was actually…

Local(ish) residents!

@Penistoe @dryasaboner

Scarecrow competition? Kurtan is that you?

Mind your own business Len. And change your trousers