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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think DD isn't fully dressed in leggings & a t-shirt?

520 replies

shesellsseacats · 15/08/2021 00:44

When I ask DD (nearly 9) to get dressed she often comes down in just leggings and a t-shirt, tucked in.

She looks undressed to me.

A t-shirt and leggings are fine for sport, or bed, or for toddlers IMO. Or a long tshirt over leggings is fine too.

But she likes to wear her T-shirt tucked in (which looks lumpy!) She just looks like she forgot to finish getting dressed like that, AIBU?

And AIBU to ask her to put another layer over the leggings? e.g. a skirt or pinafore dress or shorts?

I know it's only a small thing in the scheme of things and I'm inclined to let her get her way if we're just going to the park for a play or something. But I'm curious how others see it?

OP posts:
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waterlego · 15/08/2021 10:58

I agree, our generation have been taught that leggings are not trousers

I’m confused by some of the comments suggesting that wearing leggings as trousers (which they are) is somehow a recent thing. I wore them in the early 90s with big trainers (basketball shoes) and chunky jumpers. That was a fashion at the time.

waterlego · 15/08/2021 11:04

I don’t believe I look ‘amazing’ in my leggings (I find that word is overused), but I do look respectable. I don’t care about fashion or style, I only care about being comfortable. My leggings aren’t see-through.

The posters who find leggings inappropriate as day-to-day wear appear to be in a minority, so I wonder how many times a day they inwardly cringe when they’re out and about seeing so many women and girls in leggings. It must be tiring.

BoaCunstrictor · 15/08/2021 11:07

@waterlego

I agree, our generation have been taught that leggings are not trousers

I’m confused by some of the comments suggesting that wearing leggings as trousers (which they are) is somehow a recent thing. I wore them in the early 90s with big trainers (basketball shoes) and chunky jumpers. That was a fashion at the time.

Same! I spent a large chunk of my childhood in leggings and t shirts, and I'm not even young.
waterlego · 15/08/2021 11:13

Interesting article about the history of leggings. Check out Debbie Harry and Olivia Newton John wearing them in the 70s with (shock, horror) short tops…

www.whowhatwear.com/history-of-leggings-trend

DwangelaForever · 15/08/2021 11:17

YABU Confused

liveforsummer · 15/08/2021 11:23

@isthisareverse

EVERYONE wears such outfits believing they look A-fucking-mazing in them 😂
Not amazing. Black leggings plus a smart t shirt and my work fleece looks far from amazing, but it looks the appropriate level of smart casual, appropriate and comfortable that my job role requires. DD's don't dress to look amazing every day either. They just want to be able to play freely in weather appropriate clothing.
DwangelaForever · 15/08/2021 11:25

@DumbestBlonde

Actually I don't think you are being unreasonable...... It does depend a bit on the leggings? Personally, i hink it looks so much nicer - and was probably the original intention of leggings - if the top they wear covers their bum, longer T-shirt, sweatshirt, hoodie - or tunic-type or a dress sometimes, depending on the style.

Aside: Please, no-one get me started on cycling shorts as a "trend"; I saw an adult woman coming out of Tesco today in a pair (obviously NOTfor cycling), with a denim shirt that was just hip length - and obviously no underwear - because it looked like she was IN her undies - as the shorts were white.

@DumbestBlonde what age are you? Cycling shorts as a fashion short was deffo a thing in the 90s, maybe even the 80s too - fashion has cycles and cycling shorts deffo aren't a new thing!
QueenBee52 · 15/08/2021 11:27

Why did you buy your daughter leggings OP ?

If you feel so bitterly opposed to such a clothing item ?

Original poster
shesellsseacats · 15/08/2021 11:38

@QueenBee52

Why did you buy your daughter leggings OP ?

If you feel so bitterly opposed to such a clothing item ?

Bitterly opposed?! Hmm

Where on earth did you get that from? Are we on the same thread?!

OP posts:
whynotwhatknot · 15/08/2021 11:44

i wear primark leggins albeit with a longer to0p but theyre not see through at all

im quite large so wouldnt wear them if they were

i dont understand the not dressed thing its just a top and leggings not pj's

Ritasueandbobtoo9 · 15/08/2021 11:48

“I agree, our generation have been taught that leggings are not trousers”

How old are you? I’m late 40’s and leggings, plaid shirt, Doc martens were standard uni clothing in the 90’s.

ladygindiva · 15/08/2021 11:51

My daughters live in leggings and a t-shirt unless going somewhere special. It's clothes.

QueenBee52 · 15/08/2021 11:53

Bitterly opposed?!

Where on earth did you get that from? Are we on the same thread?!

Whats the problem then ?

Kanaloa · 15/08/2021 12:20

You wouldn't allow your 18 yo to wear a racist tshirt, would you? Of course not. So it's hypocritical to pretend they wear what they want, you still make choices.

This is a very stupid comparison. If my child was a racist at 18 I’d have more problems than what they were wearing. Also, being a racist and wearing leggings aren’t really comparable.

Kanaloa · 15/08/2021 12:21

Also, if my 18 year old was wearing a racist t-shirt then firstly I probably couldn’t stop them, and secondly ripping a racist t-shirt off them wouldn’t make them less racist.

isthisareverse · 15/08/2021 12:22

It's MN.

You can't express an opinion without someone having to jump to ridiculous hyperboles Grin

It's ok not to let your child wear leggings instead of trousers.
Many parents manage very well, and no one is bitter about it ,offended, shocked, horrified.

It's also ok to notice someone else look ridiculous or is wearing very unflattering outfits without really caring or passing out in shock and horror.

That's the main difference between MN and the real world, not your opinion, but the actual strength of it.

NerrSnerr · 15/08/2021 12:24

I had the greatest pair of cycling shorts in the 90s. They were fluorescent yellow with black stripes down the side. They brought me so much joy. I must have been about 10.

isthisareverse · 15/08/2021 12:29

Kanaloa
my point exactly.

You do realise that most normal parents manage to have discussions and rules about clothing without actually "ripping clothes off" the back of their kids?

Chill out. This level of stress and drama is much more negative for the child than anything else.

MsRia · 15/08/2021 12:30

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

HerMammy · 15/08/2021 12:32

@StrangeToSee
As she’s approaching puberty I’d say she needs to wear a long T-shirt or tunic top over her leggings, unless they’re thick leggings with pockets (treggings/jeggings?)
Why? why should she not wear them approaching puberty? is it 1950??
So do you tut disapprovingly at everyone cutting about in gym gear??

Kanaloa · 15/08/2021 12:36

@isthisareverse

So you think it’s comparable, a 9yo wearing leggings and an 18yo wearing a racist t-shirt? It’s a stupid thing to compare. And of course I wouldn’t rip clothes off my child, I was saying that if my 18yo had strayed so far from me as to be openly racist then there’s no way we’d still be close enough that I’d be telling them what to wear. Also, they’d be 18, and I wouldn’t be telling them what to wear anyway.

It didn’t make any sense as a comparison.

HammondTheHamster · 15/08/2021 12:39

I thought t shirts and leggings were pretty much standard for this age. I don't really see the problem

isthisareverse · 15/08/2021 12:42

Kanaloa

the point was that when people pretend they cannot have an opinion or kids should wear whatever they fancy, they are hypocrites.
If it was something that would bother them, suddenly they would find a voice, for an obvious example, a racist tshirt. You are free to find your own example. A cruel joke if you prefer?

My point was not to start a discussion on how you would handle or reject your own child because they have racists views Grin

Lockheart · 15/08/2021 12:43

@MsRia

My dh would of had a smack in the mouth if he had said something so disgusting about his own daughter! Let her wear what she wants as long as she is comfortable.
Ah, domestic violence, always a proportionate and reasonable response.
rainbowdashsneeze · 15/08/2021 12:43

I felt like this In the early days but I just don't care these days. She can wear anything she likes