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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to think DD isn't fully dressed in leggings & a t-shirt?

520 replies

shesellsseacats · 15/08/2021 00:44

When I ask DD (nearly 9) to get dressed she often comes down in just leggings and a t-shirt, tucked in.

She looks undressed to me.

A t-shirt and leggings are fine for sport, or bed, or for toddlers IMO. Or a long tshirt over leggings is fine too.

But she likes to wear her T-shirt tucked in (which looks lumpy!) She just looks like she forgot to finish getting dressed like that, AIBU?

And AIBU to ask her to put another layer over the leggings? e.g. a skirt or pinafore dress or shorts?

I know it's only a small thing in the scheme of things and I'm inclined to let her get her way if we're just going to the park for a play or something. But I'm curious how others see it?

OP posts:

Thread gallery

liveforsummer · 15/08/2021 09:58

people having different opinion? Of course it is.

But in really life your opinion is very much in the minority. I work with dc plus have 2 of my own fairly close to the age of OP's Dd and leggings and t shirt is basically what every child wears day to day (when it's not shorts currently, but give it another month)

MrsIsobelCrawley · 15/08/2021 09:58

@Kpo58

It depends in how revealing the leggings are. If you can see every nook and cranny, then she needs to wear something else too. If her outline is smooth, and doesn't show the finer details, then she is fine.

Creepy post.

GintyMcGinty · 15/08/2021 09:59

Some of the minority views on here about young girls are pretty grim reading.

Kanaloa · 15/08/2021 10:01

Wearing it tucked in could look a bit pervy to the wrong eyes.

Anything will look pervy through those eyes. The type of person who is looking at a 9 year old like that isn’t going to be put off by a pinafore dress stuck over the top.

liveforsummer · 15/08/2021 10:03

@GintyMcGinty

Some of the minority views on here about young girls are pretty grim reading.

Quite!

CatsArePeople · 15/08/2021 10:03

there are leggings that are supposed to be worn as tights
there are leggings like yoga pants
massive difference

you wouldn't go out in just tights, would you?

Summer20twentyone · 15/08/2021 10:03

I work in primary, most of the girls in KS2 wear what you're describing!

I agree, our generation have been taught that leggings are not trousers - I think this theory has been kicked out of the fashion arena and leggings are very much outerwear now!!

liveforsummer · 15/08/2021 10:04

@CatsArePeople

there are leggings that are supposed to be worn as tights there are leggings like yoga pants massive difference

you wouldn't go out in just tights, would you?

The leggings to be worn as tights are found in the underwear section and generally only in the adults. I don't imagine that is what OP or anyone else are buying for their dc.

Herja · 15/08/2021 10:04

The black and yellow outfit looks fine to me!

I frequently wear leggings and a tshirt, my arse is my best feature and it looks good on my body shape (no, not thin. Still look shit hot though!). DD also likes to wear leggings and a t shirt; her dad won't let her with him. She has genuinely come home crying before because he makes her wear extra layers on top before she is considered fully dressed. She dislikes moving waistbands, so leggings work well for her. Much as I wouldn't wear leggings to an interview, some jobs, or anything smart, nor would DD, but I think it's completely fine for every day wear. It's rare that kids are in a situation where they actually need to look smart, rather than wear clothes that are simply comfortable.

MolyHolyGuacamole · 15/08/2021 10:07

Literally me as a 9 year old in the 90s in leggings and a T-shirt 😂 it was my uniform and I thought I was super stylish

AIBU to think DD isn't fully dressed in leggings & a t-shirt?

MrsSkylerWhite · 15/08/2021 10:08

rosegoldivy

Akwardly sitting here in t-shirt and leggings......“

Me to. My leggings have paint stains too. Oh dear, I didn’t realise what a disgrace I am.

MolyHolyGuacamole · 15/08/2021 10:13

@isthisareverse

liveforsummer if they were trousers, they would be CALLED trousers. As it is, they are ...^leggings" 😂

Just because some people were ridiculous outfits doesn't mean a parent is wrong to put their own foot down.

By this logic, jeans also should not be worn out. Because, while they will be found in the trouser section, they are called jeans.

KurtWilde · 15/08/2021 10:13

Thing is, the DD is only 8 so presumably OP had no issue when she BOUGHT the leggings and T-shirt's to be worn!

MoirasWigStand · 15/08/2021 10:14

My 9 yr old dd ONLY wears leggings and t-shirt. She is autistic and therefore this is what is comfortable. She's tried all sorts of things, but doesn't like the feel. And she looks fine.

What a bizarre thread.

liveforsummer · 15/08/2021 10:15

I'd usually be in leggings on a Sunday but I'm back to work tomorrow and while leggings are perfectly acceptable work wear, we are not allowed blue jeans so I've been making the most of wearing those this week. 😆 I'm in my 40's and I too remember leggings with shorter tops being perfectly acceptable attire in the late 80's and 90's. I still remember the happiness after my mum finally bought me the outfit of such, that was on display on the window at Tammy girl I had wanted for so long. So nkt sure how behind the times those are who still don't accept them as clothing, but I assume it's quite a lot!

Crazysheep · 15/08/2021 10:16

My DD 11 lives in leggings or shock horror cycling shorts and tshirts. She would be absolutely horrified and point blank refuse if I asked her to wear a dress. She is a very active and sporty child. She never looks scruffy as I buy her 'nice' leggings and tshirts and throw them away when they get faded or shabby. How can you even begin to think she isn't properly dressed. Madness

isthisareverse · 15/08/2021 10:16

I don't see many of my daughter's friends wearing this, and the couple who do look like they forgot half their clothes.

If you can't tell your kid what to wear when they are 9, good luck when they are teenagers

I think giving up on your kids because the ridiculous "pick your battles" and want an easy life is sad. You don't have to like what they wear, you shouldn't wear teen fashion to try to look like their big sister as it's embarrassing for both, but you should still have some rules.

You wouldn't allow your 18 yo to wear a racist tshirt, would you? Of course not. So it's hypocritical to pretend they wear what they want, you still make choices.

LynetteScavo · 15/08/2021 10:17

Ah, the tucking the t-shirt in would so annoy me! I think I probably have my own issues.

I'm not sure what you can do if your DD is happy though, apart from asking her to wear a particular outfit if you're going somewhere special.

I bought DD cropped trousers at that age, so tucking a t-shirt in wasn't an issue.

felulageller · 15/08/2021 10:18

Oh my goodness.

isthisareverse · 15/08/2021 10:20

Sounds like a few people are miffed that the lack of outerwear chosen for their kids or themselves is being judged by others.

It's a weird contradiction, because why do you even care?

liveforsummer · 15/08/2021 10:20

If you can't tell your kid what to wear when they are 9, good luck when they are teenagers

The point is at 9 you are buying their clothes. If you hate leggings so badly don't buy them. You can't buy something then dictate exactly how you want it to be worn over the comfort of the person wearing it. Leggings are practical and comfy though so it would be a shame not to buy them due to your own weird hang ups

isthisareverse · 15/08/2021 10:25

liveforsummer

You are not making any sense. I buy my kids ski clothes and beach clothes, it doesn't mean it would make any sense to wear them randomly. It doesn't mean wearing a pair of knickers and a pair of socks only would make a suitable outfit either.

Unlike many posters, I don't buy uncomfortable clothes for my kids.

They can learn to be comfy without looking.. a bit ridiculous frankly.

SamW98 · 15/08/2021 10:28

Leggings and t-shirts are an acceptable norm in most offices these days so of course its fully dressed

aSofaNearYou · 15/08/2021 10:31

I love how all the people trying to argue that it's not fully dressed are basically saying "because I don't like what it looks like", they don't have any logical reason that = not dressed. There are lots of styles I don't personally like, but it doesn't mean they somehow aren't real clothes. She's dressed OP. Just ask her to stop tucking her tshirts in when she does it.

liveforsummer · 15/08/2021 10:31