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Original poster

Housemate who secretly recorded us has been made a lecturer at UK university

334 replies

Smurfsarethefuture · 12/08/2021 12:15

I cannot be unreasonable here. I wrote on here about two yrs ago about my housemate who hid a camera in our kitchen. He is now a lecturer at a London uni.

The police were not interested neither was landlady- I didn’t contact university and am now wondering should I?

OP posts:
Original poster
Smurfsarethefuture · 12/08/2021 12:32

@PurpleDaisies

I have actively thought about the situation and come to the conclusion that you did all you could when it happened.

I didn’t contact his university

OP posts:
MuttsNutts · 12/08/2021 12:33

If he was filming in the bathroom I’d be more concerned.

Were you nicking his cheese?

cansu · 12/08/2021 12:33

Seriously? What are you trying to prove? You were told at the time by the police that there was no case legally. Why on earth would you devote time to following this individual around trying to make their life difficult?? If you are not careful he may well look to make a complaint for harassment against you.

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 12/08/2021 12:33

@Bluntness100

I think you need to give more detail. As right now you wish to contact his employer seems malicious.
WTF

This person is working with young people in a position of power. How is i forming the Uni 'malicious'?

NotableTree · 12/08/2021 12:33

[quote Smurfsarethefuture]@PurpleDaisies

Not random. Were housemates.

Bit shocked at the responses, guys. Very passive, no?[/quote]
What kinds of response were you expecting, OP? The police didn’t think there was a case to answer at the time, so what do you think reporting him to his employer, years later, will do?

HollowTalk · 12/08/2021 12:34

Why was he filming in the kitchen? Did he think people were taking his food? I'm not justifying it - I'm wondering what his justification would have been.

If he was filming any other room then I'd be a lot more concerned.

BareGrylls · 12/08/2021 12:34

What was his reason? Was he trying to identify who nicked his milk from the fridge? If so it's hardly sinister?

ancientgran · 12/08/2021 12:35

If it was someone's room or a bathroom I'd understand but I'm not sure anyone expects privacy in a shared kitchen.

Did he film anything that you feel embarrassed about, did he use it against you or is it literally film of people washing dishes and cooking dinner?

Hathertonhariden · 12/08/2021 12:35

If you were having issues with people taking your stuff in a kitchen I think most people would suggest setting up a camera to discover who was responsible.

Did you get caught out taking his food OP?

tintodeverano2 · 12/08/2021 12:37

GDPR may come into play here providing it was after 2018

SkinnyMirror · 12/08/2021 12:37

You've not explained why the camera was there.... as others have pointed out, context is everything.

I'm not sure what you want his employer to do? I'm not saying what he did was right but you have no proof and there is nothing they could do.

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 12/08/2021 12:37

OP I have some experience of this. An ex boyfriend from when I was 18 had secretly filmed us having sex and distributed it to his mates. This wasn't illegal back then but at the time I called the police anyway and they went to his house and gave him a bit of a fright off and he destroyed the copies he had. I heard nothing more of it except some taunting texts from his friend.

12 years later I found out he was a teacher in a secondary school! I wrote to the Head but he wasn't interested and very much turned it on me to look like a bitter vengeful hag Hmm on the upside he applied to the school I currently teach at a couple of years ago and when I told my (amazing) Head what he'd done he believed me and bumped him off the interview list and told him exactly why. Ex denied it and made noises about legal action but as suspected it came to nothing.

HirplesWithHaggis · 12/08/2021 12:37

How does this affect his students?

RedRocketGirl · 12/08/2021 12:38

[quote Smurfsarethefuture]@PurpleDaisies

Not random. Were housemates.

Bit shocked at the responses, guys. Very passive, no?[/quote]
The difficulty for the university or any employer is that he hasn't been charged or convicted of any crime. Legally they can't do anything. I appreciate that it must have been a deeply upsetting exprerience but as the police didn't take it forward at the time his / her employer can't take action about the allegation now. If the housemate was a fellow student then it could possibly have been delt with as a student conduct matter and then it would have been on record.

Not sure you can do anything at all now I am afraid.

HeronLanyon · 12/08/2021 12:38

If you did contact ‘the university’ they would do nothing.
If fir any reason (everyone completely lost the plot) he would have absolute rock solid legal action against them fir data breach and repetitational losses etc.
You cannot approach someone’s employer with concerns which have not resulted in police (or other action). An employer cannot do anything with such either ! This protects us all, you too op.

newnortherner111 · 12/08/2021 12:38

I think the university should know, but wonder if you should seek legal advice, so any communication is from a solicitor not you. If the university choose to act on this information, you could be sued or threatened with legal action.

Justcallmebebes · 12/08/2021 12:38

This is crazy. there is no law whatsoever regarding putting a camera in your own kitchen even if it is a shared space. What in God's name do you think his employer is going to do?

Bathroom/bedroom then yes, you may have a point but frankly, this is batshit. If he was questioned by his employer years after the event (which is also highly unlikely) he would just say that his food/utensils were going missing and he put a camera up to try and get to the bottom of it. He will look totally normal and rational and you will look unhinged

Original poster
Smurfsarethefuture · 12/08/2021 12:38

OK, I’m going to step away for a bit - I wasn’t expecting this. He did cause a lot of stress in the house, he also left without paying bills, etc. All of that I have let go but to know he is lecturing makes me feel very uncomfortable. I don’t follow his career as suggested, we are in vaguely related areas and I recognised the dept and then saw his name.

I am a bit shocked at the responses as he created a very difficult situation.

OP posts:
BombyliusMajor · 12/08/2021 12:38

As others have said, go make a statement if you like, but be aware that universities have more than enough shit to deal with right now than fielding unsubstantiated accusations of weird but ultimately unprosecutable behaviour.

Again - wha

Bloodypunkrockers · 12/08/2021 12:38

If the police didn't think it was worth pursuing, why on earth would this man's employer care what he did in the kitchen of his own home

You sound like you've really got it in for him, unless there's a huge backstory

RosieGuacamosie · 12/08/2021 12:40

@FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop

OP I have some experience of this. An ex boyfriend from when I was 18 had secretly filmed us having sex and distributed it to his mates. This wasn't illegal back then but at the time I called the police anyway and they went to his house and gave him a bit of a fright off and he destroyed the copies he had. I heard nothing more of it except some taunting texts from his friend.

12 years later I found out he was a teacher in a secondary school! I wrote to the Head but he wasn't interested and very much turned it on me to look like a bitter vengeful hag Hmm on the upside he applied to the school I currently teach at a couple of years ago and when I told my (amazing) Head what he'd done he believed me and bumped him off the interview list and told him exactly why. Ex denied it and made noises about legal action but as suspected it came to nothing.

Filming a shared kitchen is completely different to filming someone having sex without their consent!!
FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 12/08/2021 12:40

Amazed people think the police got giving a shit is any sort of bench mark for if something was 'bad'. How many times have women come on MN and told us that the police don't give a shot when they're assaulted?

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 12/08/2021 12:42

@RosieGuacamosie yea it's different but it's still a massive invasion of privacy and a serious concern.

I imagine for those of you telling the OP she's over reacting, that if this happened to your DD at Uni, you'd be the first the call 101

HeronLanyon · 12/08/2021 12:42

Newsflash - lots of lecturers are no doubt dysfunctional and create difficult situations at home. Just as with any other job. Unless there is an offence (and indeed one which he was under a duty to disclose and hasn’t - all irrelevant anyway) then so what ?

SkinnyMirror · 12/08/2021 12:43

OK, I’m going to step away for a bit - I wasn’t expecting this. He did cause a lot of stress in the house, he also left without paying bills, etc. All of that I have let go but to know he is lecturing makes me feel very uncomfortable. I don’t follow his career as suggested, we are in vaguely related areas and I recognised the dept and then saw his name.

What specifically makes you feel uncomfortable about him lecturing? He might not be a very nice person but that often isn't a pre-requisite to employment.

I am a bit shocked at the responses as he created a very difficult situation.

But that doesn't mean he isn't allowed to have a job! I had a nightmare uni housemate but I wouldn't dream of contacting his employer about it!