My life rules

[54321nought]

Things life has taught me

1. Never never never eat white bread, or feed it to children, it just changes to sugar in your body, it is poison!

1. Never never never support slave based industry, eg cannabis, clothing made with child labour, UNNESSESARY TECH UPGRADES, like replacing perfectly good working phones for no reason

1. I'm sure I will think of more. Not much point in going into the environmental ones, like limit meat and diary, and never eat fish, don't drink bottled water etc, much debated elsewhere on Mumsnet

What are yours?

Never ever eat pineapple on pizza.

@Hilda40

Try not to be a sanctimonious twat

this ^^ also always carry a knife don't say yes if you want to say no never let anyone tell you how to dress/look/behave

1. Don't have an orgasm while you've got a black eye
2. Avoid SEMOLINA every day
3. Always have a book of stamps in your purse.

@Hilda40

Try not to be a sanctimonious twat

1. Don't have an orgasm while you've got a black eye

OMG
It sounds bad but I have to know what happens!

@Hilda40

Try not to be a sanctimonious twat

hahaha

2. Avoid SEMOLINA every day

I'm picturing a kind of nationwide obstacle course.

kudos to the OP for starting this thread even though it may not have worked out the way she planned

[quote CornedBeef451]@RhinestoneCowgirl we have the bum rule too! If you want to sit on the furniture you must wear pants!

I had to do something when both DCs went through a bit of a nudist phase. [/quote]
Does that include pets? 😬

I clicked because I thought it was a triumphant "My life rules!" and I wanted to wallow in a little congratulatory envy...

@AppleWatched

Stationery has an E for envelope; stationary is Always in the same place

Practise/practice is like advise/advice

everything tastes better with butter.

Brilliant, thank you.

My life rules
Friday night is takeaway night
Saturday is big breakfast day
Sunday ain't Sunday without roast spuds.
Monday to Thursday you just get through.

Don't waste any of your time with shitty men. If a man does Anything to make you feel bad kick him to the kerb.

Really? Are you serious? Have you never heard of vegetarian/vegan food?

Don’t eat yellow snow
Don’t wipe your arse with a broken bottle

Try not to be a sanctimonious twat

Quite. Thread not gone quite as you'd planned, OP?

Why is everyone being so nasty? OP didn't say anything terrible, just a discussion starter and subsequent posters who think they are hilarious are piling on. Weird.

@Hilda40

Try not to be a sanctimonious twat

nothing to add, first post nails it!!

Never ever make absolute unconditional rules

None of these comments are remotely funny.

Don't buy tights for a mermaid.

1. Never stick my nose in other's people's business and never engage in gossip.
2. Never share my business, esp finances and work, with anyone beyond DP and my 2 DS.
3. Recycle, reduce and reduce waste where I can.
4. Enjoy life.

Still waiting to hear what happened at the Burger King in Victoria Coach station…

Fancy a Burger King now too.

Don't hula hoop naked.

My only life rule is that ironing should always be done with a glass of wine and in front of either a film or a Royal wedding.