Rewards for A level results

[6squirrels]

My son got his a level results yesterday (got an a, b & c) and I gave him a heartfelt, meaningful gift that cost about £50. He said “so am I not getting three grand?”. I laughed as I thought he was joking but he says that everyone he knows gets this. I didn’t know what to say! I was stunned that this is a thing (£3k is an awful lot of money in my opinion), shocked that he could be so rude, and absolutely gutted that my gift had gone down like a lead balloon. I’d planned a household party for us all (plus their partners) on Friday night with takeaway pizza (this will cost around £150) and a family party on Saturday which I’ve cost caterers for (costing around £300).
Would you give your child £3k just for finishing their a levels?

Bloody hell! Why should kids get a financial reward for exams they have to do anyway? I just asked my nephew who just finished at a top public school and this is not common in his year group he says.

Education is its own reward.
We're kitting DD out for uni with a new laptop and bits for halls, that's plenty.
When we're not isolating we'll go for a meal.

We took our DD out for lunch and had a bottle of fizz to celebrate. Definitely no present in this house.

DD is off to uni and we will be supporting her financially, I think that's enough without cash on top.

I’m really curious how he arrived at that particular amount.

We don’t pay for results or grades, though I know plenty of parents who do. I do instead occasionally grant a request from my child for a particular item or experience and part of the reason am inclined to indulge these requests is that she takes her studies very seriously and doesn’t make the requests too often. She is a really good kid and I like having an excuse to acknowledge that beyond simple praise every once in awhile.

I think financial rewards for grades are really odd. DD is only just about to start year 10 but I reckon when the time comes, I am more likely to take her out or buy her a nice present before the results and tell her well done for working hard, because she always does and it will take her a long way in life. I'd always prefer to reward effort rather than results.

And I'd be spending £50 or £100 not £3K!

We had a meal from the Chinese and some asti spumante! This was 200 odd years ago, but still, some friends got a car!! Poor you that's not nice, 50 is a lot of money! I'd be tempted to take it back.

in my family we got taken out to dinner once the exams were finished but that was a well done for the hard work regardless of results.

It’s quite polarised isn’t it, like either ‘yes we gave cash rewards’ or ‘good god no!’

People in my year got certain money for grades. I didn’t. This was just for GCSE though, if I recall correctly the kids who got cash for grades didn’t stay on to 6th form.

I must be really tight, ds1 got a chocolate cake, nothing else. He got in to Oxford with 3 A*’s so an extraordinary achievement and I am incredibly proud but his reward is the place at Oxford which we will be funding for the next 4 years (masters degree)

TBF he asked for a chocolate cake, if he’d asked for a gift we would have got him something and if I could think of anything I would but he isn’t a materialistic person and doesn’t like ‘stuff’ as his room is small.

We had a nice meal. A levels 2 years ago. It's not a thing among people I know; affluent SE .?

Tell him he'll go further in life if his motivation is intrinsic not extrinsic. I don't agree with giving people prizes for doing what they need to do anyway. His reward is his grades which he can use to get on the next step of his life.

DS got Higher (A levels) results today- 5 A band 1s (we already knew he was the school Dux) and got 7 A band 1s last year at Nat 5 (GCSEs). He got a big hug and his dad said " That's a bit rubbish'

We've just done up his room from scratch (new loft room) and exH is going to buy him the plants and pots he wants for in his room. Nothing extra. I can't even pay for a night out as he's 17. Ridiculous to expect such a huge amount.

No, mine got taken out for dinner when exams had finished. I think they were more keen on going out with friends when the results came through.

Dd got a donut and a take away. That's all.

Yes we did give money for both GCSES and now A level grades

DD got A A A grades and we just gave her a card and ordered her favourite takeaway for dinner
Hope she wasn’t expecting 3k too!

DS did his GCSE’s last year and we will do the same as we did for his GCSE’s i.e. a takeaway or meal out, a card and a cake.

The following year he is off to Uni and we will have to fund him 6K per year to top him up to the minimum ML amount and the following year we will also have to fund DD for the same amount. So we won’t be giving either 3K.

They know we are proud of them and if they do well they are doing well for themselves and their future.

My parents just looked disappointed when I got mine (TBF the results reflected the amount of work I’d put in to revision)

I expect my older DD will get A*s next summer and I might chuck some cash her way, but I haven’t told her I will and I wouldn’t expect it to make much difference to how hard she’ll study (luckily she’s a lot more diligent than I was).

@Wolframhart

I’m really curious how he arrived at that particular amount.

We don’t pay for results or grades, though I know plenty of parents who do. I do instead occasionally grant a request from my child for a particular item or experience and part of the reason am inclined to indulge these requests is that she takes her studies very seriously and doesn’t make the requests too often. She is a really good kid and I like having an excuse to acknowledge that beyond simple praise every once in awhile.

That's a really good way of putting it! I think my mum finally letting me go 'out out' after my results was her way of saying, "you done good, you've earned my trust". Whether or not that was wise is another matter 😂

He’s done A levels (in the year of inflated grades), not discovered a new planet in gene solar system. I think he’s having you on.

I would've been happy with the £50! I'm the 4th out of 5 and by the time it got to me doing A Levels, the excitement of it had worn off with my parents and I didn't even get a well done 😂

I’d take the comment that “everyone he knows” is getting 3k, with a pinch of salt 😂

I'm old (53) but I got nothing, not even a card, after any of my exams.
My ds gets his GCSE results tomorrow. He took 7. He has ASD and dyslexia so it would be cruel to incentivise grades imo.
I will be thrilled if he passes them - he has had the most awful year.
If he doesn't I will still tell him I'm proud of him, because I am!
I am taking him and his best mate to town to a museum then a pizza place on Saturday for tea. Total cost will be about £50, max. HIs littel sister (and his mates little sister) will need to come too as single parent but it will still be a 'well done on your exams' treat, just shared. I'd like to buy him a watch or something for about £50 too as a 'well done for surviving the year, regardless of grades' but he won't let me.

DS just did his A levels - no presents or celebrations here - he wanted to go straight out with his friends all day and all night! It didn't occur to me to buy him something. I might suggest a meal out having read this thread.

@ShitPoetryClub I'm very curious about the graduation gifts and commissioned art as they sound interesting.

Are you willing to share any details of the things you bought? Or help me understand how to find art that goes up in value? My DH and I buy art from small local artists but I'm not sure how I'd know or find out if anything had gone up in value, and perhaps the type of art we're buying isn't the type that goes up.

I love the idea of buying something special for graduation in a few years time.

My granddaughter got hers yesterday.She got the grades required for the university, and degree she is going to study.I will pay for driving lessons for her, when they become available without a long waiting list like they have now.
Give her loads of cash?, no way.