to think "its impacting on my mental health" is over used

[54321nought]

I just seem to hear this constantly.

I know you can't judge what another person is going through. Every single individual time I hear it, I give the person the benefit of the doubt.

But overall, I just don't think that many people are having their mental health impacted!

I think it sometimes just means " I don't like this situation" /" this makes me anxious/nervous" / " this is annoying"

We have such easy lives, for the most part. Why is everyone suddenly saying that not getting their own way in something or other is giving them mental health problems?

I have cared for a lot of children and adults with mental health problems, I know how painful and debilitating they can be. Its not what I see in people who are telling me "XYZ is impacting on my mental health".

I know some mental health problems might be invisible, not surely not on this scale, when we all have food, shelter, drinking water, sanitation etc, and in places I have lived without these things, people don't seem to be claiming so many mental health problems....

@ObviousNameChage

Pressed post too soon, what I think is that the new focus on mental health has created a gap that means that people that aren't an easy/temporary "fix" (be that meds,therapy , meditation,walks,exercise,mindfulness etc) are left to flounder or in a way forgotten about in favour of "good statistics " . Look how many patients we've seen ,treated,helped ,improved. The "easy fix" patients are also paraded around and poster children for how well things are going. When things are actually pretty shit and sometimes dangerous and fatal.

That's the other side of the narrative and you often see it here, when someone that is really struggling with their mental health illnesses and in crisis. People keep posting the same old,same old ring GP,do this,do that and are in disbelief that it's not that easy, that sometimes there is no help ,waiting times are ridiculous and there's nothing you can do bar trying to make it through the day.

Absolutely agree with this. I know people mean well, however it flabbergasts me how, on the one hand, mental health is being promoted more than ever throughout society yet on the other services that treat it be becoming more and more luxury goods.

Where I live a therapy session with a trained counsellor costs £110. I can’t afford to spend that on a weekly basis! Let alone taking the advice that you might have to “try a few before you find one that suits”!

In a way, I think promoting the whole “talk to each other” mantra - whilst definitely a positive thing - also lets us avoid asking the difficult questions about how we can actually make professional mental health services more accessible. By “raising awareness” we think we’ve done enough.

Yeah I’m not even sure what exactly we are “raising awareness” of sometimes. Depression and anxiety maybe, but probably not, say, Borderline Personality or Schizoaffective Disorder.

@TossaCoinToYerWitcher

Most mental health problems are not related to life experiences…

Sorry OP, as someone who’s suffered depression I’ve been with you over the possible misuse of the term by some people, however I can’t agree with you on this. You’re basically hand waving away everyone who’s ever suffered PTSD, and I’m fairly sure they don’t form a small minority!

I said "most," and I made an exception for trauma.

obviously some mental health conditions are related to life circumstances, but in general, not the ones that are being blamed for causing mental health problems

*I said "most," and I made an exception for trauma.

obviously some mental health conditions are related to life circumstances, but in general, not the ones that are being blamed for causing mental health problems*

What you did was use a very dismissive and derisive "few" (in the UK).

Really? Few? Let's add all the grownups with ACEs, all the kids that are being abused and neglected right now, all the people being abused ,raped,beaten by a partner ,friend,family member,boss,stranger, all the people with jobs that can cause trauma (police,health care,armed forces ,firefighters etc). That's without adding in many other variables and circumstances. Still think it's "few"?

When I break as I do sometimes, if I were to ask for help (which I never will) all you'd see is someone that portrays "happy" very well , fed,sheltered ,with a job etc. What you wouldn't know (and very few people do,mostly just OH and my best friend)is that I was abandoned at birth, that my adoptive mother was physically ,mentally and emotionally abusive, that I was sexually assaulted several times including by family members and that I was always dismissed,blamed laughed at and silenced , my other abusive relationships, my self harm scars and other self destructive behaviour that left other type of scars,my suicidal ideation.

So no , I don't have a diagnosis,or a medical history or paperwork but I still fucking break . Sometimes even over ridiculous or trivial things.because no matter how good or average or privileged my life looks on paper , it's still exhausting to live with all that every day.

And I do have a history of anxiety, panic attacks, depression, not leaving my room or eating or sleeping for weeks on end ,self harm like i mentioned etc. It's just not documented because at first I was too young, and the people that were supposed to care didn't, and then I was too fucked up to be able to do it. It doesn't mean it didn't happen or that they aren't part of my history .

I know you can't judge what another person is going through. Every single individual time I hear it, I give the person the benefit of the doubt.But overall, I just don't think that many people are having their mental health impacted!

Surely you can't have both of these sentences together? They totally contradict each other.

Also, I would strongly advise you stop volunteering for mental health related charities.

We lose sight of the fact half of the humans in the world don't have these things.Also in the UK, we are living in peace, not war.

Ahhhh you're one of those.

"You access to water darling, you can possibly have any issues"

Take a trip over to the stately homes thread.

It's certainly replaced being a bit pissed off.
Interesting that during the Olympics it was used to withdraw from an event yet the person was a week later OK to compete in another event
When someone is experiencing a mental block that means they lose their ability to concentrate on where they are in the air, placing them in a highly dangerous situation, I'd say it was fairly sensible to step back and regroup.

Unless of course you're willing to do several rotations on both axis several metres in the air with limited coordination and not being able to think straight? I highly doubt any of the people sticking the boot into Biles for making a call on her safety would be willing to do half of what she does.

@jb7445

This is a hard one, because I have really REALLY struggled with getting any help with my mental health. I am 'normal' (whatever that is) 95% of the time. I am well spoken, I hold down a very well paid professional job, have a caring lovely family, I have my own house and a loving husband - all the stuff that creates that veneer of 'normality'.

I also have BPD and C-PTSD. Every once in a while I have a mental health episode that usually ends in being sectioned, or suicide attempts, or attacking my husband, or a mix of the above. I can feel when I am spiraling and I do say to others that things they are doing (mainly my husband tbh) are sending me into an episode. I might look OK at that point but I know full well that I will shortly not be. I have tried to explain this to my husband, my family, my GP, even the panel after being sectioned - but because I seem outwardly fine it's largely ignored.

I would really argue against the idea that mental health services are easily obtained by uttering the magic words of 'mental health'. Certainly not for me. Although I would agree that the words aren't always used accurately (I mean, we've always had drama queens in society!), I would also argue strongly that you, personally, cannot know whether the person involved is truly being affected and is moments away from throwing themselves out of a window (yes I have done this, directly after seeking support from family) or is just exaggerating. Personally, I think we should generally assume the former.

But that’s the thing. ‘Mental health’ has become so routine and used for even passing feelings that nobody believes people like you anymore because of all the time wasters. Also as a pp have mentioned - making it something that ‘everyone suffers from’ and creating the impression that it’s easily fixed means that real, complex conditions which (like physical illnesses) can’t be ‘fixed’, only managed with careful monitoring etc are shoved under the carpet.

Mental illnesses are a serious issue and should be taken as such. The conflation with mental health is detrimental. The pathologisation of normal human reactions is detrimental.

Also to add - of course something seems less serious when everybody appears to have it. If it’s ‘normal’ by default it’s not a problem.

That’s why the concepts of mental illnesses (not normal) and mental health (normal) should be kept very very distinct and clearly separate. You have a mental illness that impacts your mental health.

Other people may have situations that impact their mental health but don’t have any mental illness - which probably pertains to the vast majority. Making a large fuss about these devalues the seriousness of your condition

About 10 years ago I became very mentally ill and was diagnosed with depression. I was put on antidepressants and the depression pretty much went away. However I had other symptoms that kept persisting. I would stay awake for a week and then sleep for 1 hour then go back to not sleeping for a week. I was highly energised, saying and doing very inappropriate things that was way out of character for me, I was convinced that people were trying to steal my thoughts and they were inserting their thoughts into my head so I would say and do things I would never normally do. I was hearing voices and often those voices would scream at me that I had to hurt myself or the world would end so I started self harming. I was convinced that people were after me so I barely left the house. I would scream at people in the street to stop stealing my thoughts. When I tried to talk to anyone about it people would usually say "I saw you smiling the other day so you must be ok" or "just fake it til you make it and you'll be fine"

I did end up telling my doctor about the people who wanted to hurt me and who were stealing my thoughts and he gave me the number for the mental health line (I'm in Australia) I gave them a call, can't remember what I told them but they called me back and told me they had serious concerns and I had a choice I could either volunteer to go into the psych ward or they would send the police to get me. I volunteered. Unfortunately my experience in the hospital was awful. The doctor refused to listen to me. Told me I was depressed because I didn't like myself (I've always liked myself) and when I tried to tell him about the voices he scoffed, stood up and walked out of the room. I was then released from the hospital, still with all the symptoms. I was then readmitted a few weeks later and diagnosed with bipolar, given a prescription at the end of my stay and sent on my way, no counselling, no therapy, nothing. I floundered for several years, in and out of hospital, not being able to work or barely function. Then a couple of years ago I went into hospital again. This time I was listened to, my diagnosis was changed to schizoaffective disorder and I was put on different medication that has made the world of difference. It took nearly 10 years for me to be listened to, properly diagnosed and put on the correct dosage. It should not have taken that long.

Do I get annoyed when it seems like those who are anxious/depressed are getting a lot of help? Yes and no. Yes because I think many (not all) are confusing feeling anxious/depressed with having diagnosable anxiety/depression -we all get anxious but it doesn't mean we have clinical anxiety and they are taking services away from those who really need them. On the other hand I try not to be too annoyed because that person could be in crisis - often times being mentally unwell is the symptom of something else such as abuse or domestic violence and I know how it feels not to be listened to when you are unwell and how traumatic that can be.

The thing that bothers me the most is that while it's

Oops accidentally pressed too soon...

As I was saying, the thing that bothers me the most is that while it's fantastic mental health/illness is being spoken about and that more and people are trying to fight the stigma, the disorders that are the least stigmatised anxiety and depression are the ones that get spoken about more. Whereas the highly stigmatised illnesses such as schizophrenia are barely mentioned of course I'm not saying that someone with anxiety or depression has never been stigmatised against but it's very different to having something like a psychotic disorder. I've lost friends because "they can't be friends with someone like me" or people have said "am I safe around you"? I've never been violent in my life and I'm way more at risk to myself.

Really? Few? Let's add all the grownups with ACEs, all the kids that are being abused and neglected right now, all the people being abused ,raped,beaten by a partner ,friend,family member,boss,stranger, all the people with jobs that can cause trauma (police,health care,armed forces ,firefighters etc). That's without adding in many other variables and circumstances. Still think it's "few"?

exactly, I know all that, I deal with people in these situations very day, and yet the sheer number of people saying they are "having their mental health impacted" vastly outnumber the people who are experiencing/have experienced trauma like this, over 100:1, I would say.

Although in every single individual case, I will give the person the benefit of the doubt, the sheer numbers means they cannot having impacted mental health!

YANBU. It can be quite manipulative.

@Sagealicious

Oops accidentally pressed too soon...

As I was saying, the thing that bothers me the most is that while it's fantastic mental health/illness is being spoken about and that more and people are trying to fight the stigma, the disorders that are the least stigmatised anxiety and depression are the ones that get spoken about more. Whereas the highly stigmatised illnesses such as schizophrenia are barely mentioned of course I'm not saying that someone with anxiety or depression has never been stigmatised against but it's very different to having something like a psychotic disorder. I've lost friends because "they can't be friends with someone like me" or people have said "am I safe around you"? I've never been violent in my life and I'm way more at risk to myself.

It’s only ever about destigmatising anxiety and depression, you’re absolutely right. Very little work done to destigmatise unglamorous mental health difficulties such as addiction or personality disorders.

Yes it is overused and diminishes the impact for those whi suffer from poor mental health- i heard someone on the news the other day saying, "well with the rise in mental health.." what does that even mean?

@Monday26July these are the conditions that are the most easily conflated with normal moods and also the easiest for people to ‘identify’ with

YANBU

People are being too precious about their "mental health" these days.

I'm still curious about why you've chosen to volunteer in the area OP?

What is your role and what training have you had?

@Hobnobsandbroomstick

I'm still curious about why you've chosen to volunteer in the area OP?

What is your role and what training have you had?

well, I am not going to name the charities I work for, but I have been involved for around 30 years, and not only have I had 30 years worth of training myself, I have also trained in how to deliver training, and have been delivering it for the last 15 years.

And, as I have said, for any individual in front of me, I take them at their word, and train others to do so as well. \Its only when I sit back and think of the sheer numbers that are talking about having their mental health impacted ( both in charity work, and in normal life) that i know the numbers are wrong.

Its a bit like working with asylum seekers, I know statistically half of the asylum seekers in front of me will be found not to be genuine, but every individual in front of me, I take to be 100% genuine there and then, even though I know overall, many are not

I didn't ask you to name the charities you work for, I asked why you've chosen to work in the area, and for free, and what training you've had and what your role is. You haven't answered any of that in your reply, just repeated that in your eyes a lot of people are faking it.

I don't understand why you would choose to spend your free time doing something when you sound quite cynical and resentful of people asking for help.

30 years training and so derisory and sceptical, because on your personally devised scale, they don't appear to be suffering enough for them to count.

I know people who work with Asylum Seekers who are racist af, don't believe anything unless the person is in rags, and maybe not even then, and talk to asylum seekers as if they're nobodies.

If you cared, you wouldn't put up such a post especially as you know it'll encourage scorn of people for not being tough or resilient enough, not pulling themselves together as it were. & It reflects badly on available services as you're implying they can't assess mental health so are gullible, being fooled by clients.

The services out there are poor as it is, made worse by people who lack empathy (but likely sound good on paper so get an inroad) and appear to be drawn towards areas where vulnerable people can be found.

Personal prejudices that lead to bias and pre-judging is common enough in care and health services

@Hobnobsandbroomstick

I didn't ask you to name the charities you work for, I asked why you've chosen to work in the area, and for free, and what training you've had and what your role is. You haven't answered any of that in your reply, just repeated that in your eyes a lot of people are faking it.

I don't understand why you would choose to spend your free time doing something when you sound quite cynical and resentful of people asking for help.

I have chosen to work in this area because I| am a caring person.

I am not detailing the training I have had, because it is too outing, suffice to say, all of it over many decades, and I now deliver it.

I don't resent people asking for help. I am frustrated with the obfuscating, and the consequential misdirection of time and resources

Maybe 30yrs is too long and you're just not as up to date as you should be to cope with modern health expectations?
Giving YOU the benefit of the doubt, maybe you had a bad day and were just venting. I'd hate to think that you really think people in the UK have it easy so couldn't possibly be suffering, or at least not in numbers you find acceptable.
It took me a long time to seek help for my mental health as I was convinced everyone would think 'what has she got to be depressed about?' it appears some people in the field do.