Locked Parking Thread - The Actual End

[BlueEyesWhiteDragon]

This has been a wild ride made substantially more entertaining by DBs shenanigans but the end is in sight.

Hopefully by 8.35 the car will be free. I will be downing something alcoholic and next time the straw comes I'll make him bring it in by hand one bale at a time WITHOUT unlocking the gate!

I'm going to go for dignified and just let him out and convince myself that him moving it at all makes this a draw my victory. He no doubt will do the same and we'll both potter off happily into the sunset hopefully never to meet again!

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* Edited by MNHQ to add *

Previous threads all here:

To lock the jackass in (parking thread)
Locked parking thread 2
Locked Parking Thread 3(!!!))
Locked parking thread 4 - The End
Locked Parking Thread 5 - The Actual End

What a fucking cunt, I would be shaking with rage if I were you tbh.

He didn't get held up. He always intended to come at 9pm. Just like he never intended to come at 7.30pm because he chose 5pm and didn't care that you had told him no.

You dont owe him anything. You gave him 24 hours notice. Have it towed tomorrow. Dont go out when he gets there

Honestly I would be raging and not sure I'd be able to contain my temper if I was you & he showed up now. I suspect I would explode with rage all over him. Good luck!

Can’t believe he’s not there!!!

I'm so angry on your behalf !!

Happy to chip in a couple of quid if you set up a crowd funder to pay for the tow truck

Hes going to show up at 9 on the dot to assert his dominance like the massive turdpotatoe he is. OP make him apologise before you unlock it. Or let him.know the dung pile.will be moved on top of it again if it or he is ever seen on your land again.

Do not answer the door.

I'd certainly make him wait til you find the keys though...............

Stop engaging with him OP. You’ve been more than fair.

He uses "5 minutes" a lot, doesn't he? To mean anything from five minutes to several days. I wonder if he can't count any higher than five.

He's 5 minutes away because that would be 9:00pm, the time he said he would come that you said no to.

Tell him to fuck off.

Is it possible to hate someone you don’t actually know?
He’s just the worst.

Well the last time he said he’d only be a few minutes you ended up with the car staying for 4 days.... what a knob

Also been following this from the start. Not sure what I’m going to do when he finally collects it.

@susiebluebell

The irony of him saying he's 5 mins away!

OP shouldn't have had to message him again though. He should have messaged to confirm he was still on his way and sorry for the further delay.

@SquashMinusIsShit

Happy to chip in a couple of quid if you set up a crowd funder to pay for the tow truck

Happy to chip in more than a couple of quid.

@BlueEyesWhiteDragon

FFS.

I've messaged.

You aren't here ..... again. I will not be arranging a third collection you do not turn up to. It will be towed tomorrow

He's replied.

5 mins away. Got held up.

NO NO NO NO NOOOOO! Tough shit!

Text back: 5 mins or do you mean 5 fucking days knobhead?

OMG the suspense!

Please don't let this prick make the terms.

@lastcall

He's 5 minutes away because that would be 9:00pm, the time he said he would come that you said no to.

Tell him to fuck off.

This this this

I know it's easier said than done though.

Don’t let runny yoghurt man win!!

What did he get held up by? A highwayman?!

He’s going to get beat up in front of his kids someday if he keeps going through life like this.

And he will have had it coming.