How long did it take for you to be on 'farting' terms with your DPs

[fuckyeahpercywigwam]

This is not really an AIBU, but inspired by the hilarious 'he shat in the garden' thread.

My friend's daughter has been married for seven years...child-free..but her and her DH have never farted in each other's hearing. Nope. They discreetly remove themselves to the loo.

I cannot believe this.

Never?

Chikapu obviously

I was quite discrete about this until I got pregnant (about 3 years). Some nights it sounded like someone was revving a motorbike in the bed .

@UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme That’s got nothing to do with this thread or any of my points, so it’s a pointless comparison, this is a thread about farting in front of your partner.. which I have no issue with doing and don’t see a normal bodily function as ‘disrespectful’ in anyway.

2nd date. I knew from that moment unless something major happened we'd be together for a long time, I couldn't hold it in so didn't. It's a natural bodily function. Neither of us find them particularly funny, unless they make a spectacular sound. But we are comfortable enough with each other to not hide our bodies natural functions and make ourselves uncomfortable. 12 years later, 2 children, various bouts of food poisoning, noro etc, I am glad we got over that hurdle early on and don't allow it to cause any embarrassment. I don't want to have to hide normality in my own home, elsewhere is obviously a different matter.

As I said above, we're not farters but I think people are reading more into that than necessary. We've been married 21 years, DH cleaned me up when I shat myself in labour, I cleaned him up when he had the most God awful sickness and diarrhoea in a Travelodge once. And if a fart escapes from either of us we don't go into shock. But that doesn't mean we go around wilfully letting rip, I just don't think it's very pleasant. DD2 does enough farting for both of us anyway!

@Rockbird

As I said above, we're not farters but I think people are reading more into that than necessary. We've been married 21 years, DH cleaned me up when I shat myself in labour, I cleaned him up when he had the most God awful sickness and diarrhoea in a Travelodge once. And if a fart escapes from either of us we don't go into shock. But that doesn't mean we go around wilfully letting rip, I just don't think it's very pleasant. DD2 does enough farting for both of us anyway!

Well yes that's how see it. Some people here see it as a competitive sport.

I mean Dutch ovens...that would be it for me and I mean that.

What if you go into your locked bathroom to fart then then someone else needs to go in immediately after. Do you tell them not to go in until it’s safe?

This reminds me of my DH coming out of the bathroom one morning and saying “I’d leave it a few minutes if I were you” as I was getting out of bed. I thought he meant he’d just done a really stinky shit, but it was actually just that the heating had only just come on and the bathroom was still a bit chilly.

I think farts are funny and don't care who does it around me DP does it so I do to

@ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba

all my farty friends, I have 2 words for you: Dutch oven

😉

Repulsive.

Rockbird and Actonsquirrel exactly.
JumperooSue I was clarifying the use of the word respect, which you took issue with. If you can't see that respect for your family members includes having the same consideration for their comfort then there's nothing to be gained by me explaining.

@UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme And I was clarifying that I don’t agree with your choice of word in this instance. Anyway, I’m done bickering about farts on the internet with strangers✌🏻

Never. Unless by accident/asleep - same goes for DH. Anyone can have the odd slip but I wouldn't tolerate big purposeful displays of wind, it's disrespectful. However I know part of my reason stems from my own upbringing. My dad was a disrespectful pig who knew my mum didn't like it so would purposely lift his leg like a dog and let rip anything that reminds me of him is a big no no!

I just couldn't do it. I find it so off putting

I'm with you OP. We fart, wee and poo in front of each other! And apart from pooing (that came after kids) we did it very early doors. It hurts to hold in farts! Why do it to yourself?

We don't find it funny, they're just normal bodily functions. Why make it a thing, it's normal not gross. Never met a human that doesn't fart.

Come on, relax (...literally) a little. Life's too short to be worrying about little noises and smells that come from your behind.

I find farting funny. I’m not ashamed.

Those who are saying "you wouldn't do it out in public/at work etc." - I must live in a different world from you, as people do do it in public. Often, you can't help it, or don't even know it's on its way until it's happened. Granted, you probably grunt or wouldn't lift your leg high in the air before inviting your boss to "cop a whiff of that bad boy", but people do frequently blow off in public. Probably more frequently than people realise, considering that they don't always really smell.

Now I'm starting to wonder how many queues for public toilets are artificially made much longer than they need to be because they're full of people who only need a momentary parp, which might end up not even smelling or making a noise anyway.

*Granted, you probably grunt

probably DON'T grunt

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll

Those who are saying "you wouldn't do it out in public/at work etc." - I must live in a different world from you, as people do do it in public. Often, you can't help it, or don't even know it's on its way until it's happened. Granted, you probably grunt or wouldn't lift your leg high in the air before inviting your boss to "cop a whiff of that bad boy", but people do frequently blow off in public. Probably more frequently than people realise, considering that they don't always really smell.

Now I'm starting to wonder how many queues for public toilets are artificially made much longer than they need to be because they're full of people who only need a momentary parp, which might end up not even smelling or making a noise anyway.

Also there is just a fundamental difference between piblic place and my sofa 😁

I will never forget a guy in one city (not in uk) who FARTED the most amazingly loud fart while waiting to cross the road. The tourists next to him barely held it together, I choked giggling and wanted to give him a clap because that noise was impressive especially that you could hear it over busy traffic and he just.. . Did even flinch😂
My fart hero

I get and respect people who personally find it unpleasant, but it concerns me how it then creeps to being a 'disgusting' thing to do anywhere there might be other people in the vicinity. I think it can 'creep' and turn into the same attitude as we already have which makes so many women terrified of being heard pooing in public - even in a locked toilet cubicle - and the ensuing bullying/criticising/pearl-clutching because somebody had the 'shame' to fulfil a natural bodily function in a cubicle specifically designed for it.

Yes, there will be some people who do it deliberately and/or aggressively, but in general, people just fart because they need to fart - not because they want to upset you.

Yes, there will be some people who do it deliberately and/or aggressively, but in general, people just fart because they need to fart - not because they want to upset you.

Absolutely this and the rest

SchrodingersImmigrant

Indeed, there are a lot of people who would think nothing of doing what they need to, wind-wise, just the same as if they needed a cough, and who would expect everybody to simply ignore it; and they would consider somebody who commented on/complained about/visibly reacted to it as the rude, disgusting one.

Early on. Cant imagine having to hide things from a dp. We'd never poo in front of each other but that's because it would be torture, not because we're ashamed.

I wouldn't be embarrassed if it happened accidentally or tell DH off or anything, but we wouldn't ever do it deliberately. I have a friend who thinks farting all the time is a funny personality trait and I think it's absolutely repulsive.

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll

SchrodingersImmigrant

Indeed, there are a lot of people who would think nothing of doing what they need to, wind-wise, just the same as if they needed a cough, and who would expect everybody to simply ignore it; and they would consider somebody who commented on/complained about/visibly reacted to it as the rude, disgusting one.

That is a clash of cultures.

It is definitely not the universally accepted etiquette that people go round farting away in company and everyone else just quietly marinates in their stink without mention.

I worked in an office for a bit where one of the managers would sit there doing loud smelly farts throughout the shift (and looking amused every time he did). In that case we mostly did just carry on without mentioning it, I suppose the same way you do if there’s a mad person on the tube, however it was disrespectful and gross and no one was cool with it.

In social settings, most people I know would pass comment if someone did a loud/smelly fart next to them.

In other settings (maybe work?) they might not mention it but everyone would notice and probably remark on it once you were out of earshot.