'Unrefined' words / phrases

[brideyb]

I'm a little... rough around the edges

But I want to be seen as more sophisticated and grown up at work (prof services) and socially. I catch myself saying things that my colleagues never do and want to train myself out of it in order to progress and be seen as a shit together adult. My vocab seems to be stuck in my teenage years, I can't think of the words right now but I know I do it - things like ' cool' and ending a call with see yaaaa laterrrr'

Middleclass Mumsnet and senior professional woman - what phrases do I need to cut out?

Also nothing to do with accent or grammar - rising intonation and vocal fryyyyyy - are a NO.

Speak slowly and take your time, people who do this always sound wiser and more in control than they probably are.
Avoid referring to yourself as 'myself'.
Don't talk about getting your ducks in a row.
Some people use 'while' instead of 'til, sounds a bit colloquial, not sure where it comes from? I.e. "Monday 'while' Friday".
Don't try too hard. I remember a woman at work used a"posh" voice for her answer machine message which said that she would "h'endeavour to return your call as soon as possible", it's possible to sound as if you're trying too hard.
Anyways, I'm off for a slash now...

@Everythingiseverything3

Speak slowly and take your time, people who do this always sound wiser and more in control than they probably are. Avoid referring to yourself as 'myself'. Don't talk about getting your ducks in a row. Some people use 'while' instead of 'til, sounds a bit colloquial, not sure where it comes from? I.e. "Monday 'while' Friday". Don't try too hard. I remember a woman at work used a"posh" voice for her answer machine message which said that she would "h'endeavour to return your call as soon as possible", it's possible to sound as if you're trying too hard. Anyways, I'm off for a slash now...

That 'while' thing is East Yorkshire

There is a big push in professional services for social mobility and to move away from default middle class Oxbridge and red brick candidates. The odd "rough round the edges" phrase probably won't do you any harm tbh as long as your written English is impeccable and you are good at your job.

(Law firm partner, if it helps.)

Please don't change. I bet there's nothing to wrong with the way you speak and trying to be something you're not can seem affected.

Some people use 'while' instead of 'til, sounds a bit colloquial, not sure where it comes from? I.e. "Monday 'while' Friday".

Yorkshire. The Sisters of Mercy (from Leeds) once made a song called 'Nine While Nine' sending this up.

Yes, not just East Yorkshire.

@EsoNoSeHace

Yes, not just East Yorkshire.

Ah. I only have experience with people from East Yorkshire!

Avoid referring to yourself as 'myself'.

I would add don't use "I myself..." as in, "I myself would never do something like that."

The "myself" is superfluous.

@MarieIVanArkleStinks

Some people use 'while' instead of 'til, sounds a bit colloquial, not sure where it comes from? I.e. "Monday 'while' Friday".

Yorkshire. The Sisters of Mercy (from Leeds) once made a song called 'Nine While Nine' sending this up.

Parts of Northants, too.

I agree with those recommending that you read a good quality newspaper and good books. Read Terry Pratchett or PG Wodehouse for terrific stories but also for their love of the English language. Also, read with a dictionary close by and look up words you don’t understand. Find a person whose way of speaking appeals to you and mimic a particular phrase or two just to see how it feels. And be patient with yourself! You seem lovely and self-aware. Best wishes!

@Mango101

Missing out 'g' eg 'talkin' Very annoyingly done by a BBC presenter covering Olympics :)

And our beloved home Secretary, reproduced very well on "Dead Ringers"

A little pedantic, but sentences ending with a proposition are something i'm not keen on.
Completely agree

*ILoveShula

@whistlers, not a joke, but I worded the sentence to illustrate the point, and it should have saidpreposition.

Shame. Was excellent otherwise!*

I understood it anyway!

OP, this may be controversial but I would never use the word "Ladies" apart from perhaps "Ladies and gentlemen".
It strikes me as estate agent talk. "Hello everyone" is sufficient, to give an example where someone might use the word "ladies".

@SalsaLove

I agree with those recommending that you read a good quality newspaper and good books. Read Terry Pratchett or PG Wodehouse for terrific stories but also for their love of the English language. Also, read with a dictionary close by and look up words you don’t understand. Find a person whose way of speaking appeals to you and mimic a particular phrase or two just to see how it feels. And be patient with yourself! You seem lovely and self-aware. Best wishes!

I'd second that. Roget's Thesaurus is your friend too.

@Oneearringlost, I made a typo. It was preposition I was thinking of.

A proposition is something I wouldn't worry myself over.

@notanothertakeaway

My pet hates are "would of" (instead of "would have"), "myself" (eg please return the form to myself") and "me and Tom went to the shop" ( instead of "Tom and I ....")

Listen to Radio 4

Read a quality newspaper. Actually, read anything

Listen to The Archers, not Coronation Street

Liston to The Archers, by all means, but please shove your fingers in your ears when any of the Grundys or Carters are engaged in dialogue.

If you want some light relief from Radio 4 and broadsheets, watch "Hello Ladies", 2014 film directed and starring Stephen Merchant. Sums up my point about the word "Ladies", exactly.

[quote ILoveShula]@Oneearringlost, I made a typo. It was preposition I was thinking of.

A proposition is something I wouldn't worry myself over.[/quote]

Be yourself. As long as you aren’t swearing and being abusive it really doesn’t matter. I wouldn’t judge someone for how they speak. Who would? A twat that’s who, so why worry.

“Can't see anything wrong with "if that makes sense". I use this all the time at work in a tentative way. Also occasionally put this at the end of a lengthy email, i.e.- "Hope that makes some sense".”

I completely disagree with this if you want to be taken seriously at work. Why would you want to sound tentative?

@Snoopsnoggysnog

“Can't see anything wrong with "if that makes sense". I use this all the time at work in a tentative way. Also occasionally put this at the end of a lengthy email, i.e.- "Hope that makes some sense".”

I completely disagree with this if you want to be taken seriously at work. Why would you want to sound tentative?

Agree. It's so needy

One thing an ex colleague often said was, ‘I rung her/him’, instead of ‘rang’.

She was very conscious of her lack of education, so I’m sure she’d have liked to know, but I could never bring myself to tell her.

Agree ‘oh my god’ sounds so fucking tacky, as does ‘Jesus fucking christ’. Shudder. Avoid!

Good advice @pen That's what I did!