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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To want a night off?

113 replies

theUrbanDryad · 27/11/2007 14:54

As some of you who are on the Xmas do thread might know, dh and i are currently in "negotiations" over when i come back from the MN Xmas do. the plan originally was that i was going to drive down to a MNer's house, get ready there, go from there to London, then stay over there and drive back to IL's (where dh and ds would be staying) in the morning. that plan went awry because the MNer couldn't go in the end.

anyway, then i said i'd just get the train back the same night, but i realised that i'd have to leave the party at half 10 which would be rather pointless.

then a lovely MNer offered me either a place to crash overnight, or a lift back to her house so i could drive back to the IL's the same evening. i would rather stay over because if i drive back that evening then i can't have a drink.

i don't think it's unreasonable to have one night off. dh can settle ds now, ds takes a bottle, and he'll be with his grandparents, who utterly adore him. i should add, by the way, that dh has spent quite a few nights away since ds was born (admittedly for work, but still) and i'm exepcted to just cope with that, while he has ds for 1 night and it's the end of the farkin world.

so, AIBU??

OP posts:
theUrbanDryad · 27/11/2007 16:53

Soupy - dh has warm squidgy breasts too i laughed sycophantically just then, by the way...

OP posts:
Olihan · 27/11/2007 16:54

That's still 4 nights, if you start tonight. It doesn't take little ones that long to accept a new routine - by saturday they should both be fine.

nailpolish · 27/11/2007 16:55

why dpnt you both come

leave ds with gran

LoveMyGirls · 27/11/2007 16:56

If he was on his own at home i'd be more sympathetic but his parents who have managed with their own child/ren will be there to hold his hand. He has no arguement other than the one where you came in slaughtered and had to have you hair held but thats in the past.

If you were my dw i'd rather you stayed out all night than come home in that state

theUrbanDryad · 27/11/2007 16:56

good god naily

no

OP posts:
Olihan · 27/11/2007 16:58

That's a very good point LMG. If, for any reason, ds decides not to settle then there are 3 of them to take it in turns and MrUD's mum to calm him down (MrUD, that is, not ds!).

lou33 · 27/11/2007 17:03

I'm with soupy 100%

nailpolish · 27/11/2007 17:04

lol

seiously. to me the point is MrUD is staying at his parents. they will probably have the novelty factor and get up to shussh and feed ds. MrUD will probably get a long lie in too while they coo over him

winners all round

lou33 · 27/11/2007 17:06

i dont believe for a second that 3 people cannot care for 1 child while mum has an overnighter

theUrbanDryad · 27/11/2007 17:07

you'd think, wouldn't you lou?

OP posts:
nailpolish · 27/11/2007 17:08

EXACT;Y lou

lou33 · 27/11/2007 17:11

3 adults 1 child, they can cope with anything that happens

go out, have fun and go back the next day

unchartered territory will be no longer when you get back, which means you can do it again!

LoveMyGirls · 27/11/2007 17:13

MrUD seems to have gone quiet..........

nailpolish · 27/11/2007 17:15

MrUD i can see your point but you have to be brave and positive.

(jeez sounds like a climb up everest rather than a night at your parents)

theUrbanDryad · 27/11/2007 17:17

i think he's trying to do some work...

OP posts:
Flamesparrow · 27/11/2007 17:18

do't you DARE go and discuss in private

Tis fun!

lou33 · 27/11/2007 17:18

general opinion is YANBU UD

is he regretting posting now?

MisterUrbanDryad · 27/11/2007 17:38

"is he regretting posting now?"

Not at all, as most people are suggesting compromise, which is all I wanted all along.

LoveMyGirls · 27/11/2007 17:42

So is this solved?

MisterUrbanDryad · 27/11/2007 18:21

Well, UD has stopped being quite so stroppy, and has actually read what I wrote about how I see things, which she hasn't actually let me state uninterrupted until now, so it's getting there.

Flamesparrow · 27/11/2007 18:28

I think we could use this sometimes too, but my DH just doesn't tell me how he feels, not that I interrupt, just sod all feedback

Camillathechicken · 27/11/2007 18:33

yes, UD, tis me, in disguise !

i agree with nailpolish and soupdragon , FWIW.. but if you say will be home at a particular time you should be home. also, 3 adults and one baby should be an walk in the park

go, enjoy, have fun.. mrUD can enjoy being with parents and his little boy

MisterUrbanDryad · 27/11/2007 18:39

" if you say will be home at a particular time you should be home"

Or at least, call me and let me know what's going on...

"mrUD can enjoy being with parents "

COUGHSPLUTTER er... well...

"and his little boy"

Yeah, I do enjoy this. Maybe I'll just have to invent a whole load of new games to distract him.

Camillathechicken · 27/11/2007 18:41

he's 10 months old, making a puppet out of an old sock or blowing rasperries should do the trick !

a bath is always a good way to pass some time too

EricL · 27/11/2007 18:43

Yeah - let some responsible adults deal with it.

You go out and have some fun for yourself Urban - otherwise you will end up insane.

Have a good night!

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