To refuse to attend because I have nothing to wear....

[Pisstakemuch]

Wedding this weekend. I been having some health issues and currently have quite a bloated stomach. Literally, none of my dresses fit without me looking 5 months pregnant! Even if I tried to buy a new one, I can't see how I can hide it.
I really just want to tell DP I'm not going. I'd be so self conscious and uncomfortable, not to mention the criticism of my toxic in-laws. AIBU?

If you're not comfortable then don't go... it's nobody else's business ..

could you not suddenly 'test positive' with Covid
have a migraine
take laxatives and be too poorly to attend and put them in husbands food as well, !!!
be called into work on a rush job ?

yes i have many ways of getting out of things i dont want to go to

@tootiredtobother

could you not suddenly 'test positive' with Covid have a migraine take laxatives and be too poorly to attend and put them in husbands food as well, !!! be called into work on a rush job ?

yes i have many ways of getting out of things i dont want to go to

ooh you're good 🤣😂

yes try these excuses 🌸

Trousers and a floaty top or a floaty coat will cover a bloated tummy. I sympathise, I have health issues and a curved spine that give me similar problems.

If I say so myself, I rocked the above look at one of my DC's wedding! 😊

A padded bra - a push one with a bit of extra padding underneath can take you up a size while still looking natural and might make things look more balanced. Heavy duty spanx might work a bit if you can bear to wear them. I'm not sure about Empire style dresses for your shape either. Anything with some gathering or knotting etc round the waist can hide a lot. Try not to go for a tent as it just makes you look bigger.

Loads of tiered dresses out there at the moment op which hide a multitude...

https://www.monsoon.co.uk/tiered-dress-in-organic-cotton-pink-24036410.html

https://m.shopbop.com/cotton-strappy-tiered-dress-enza/vp/v=1/1525676861.htm?extid=affprglinkshareeSB-25ZRSXYPVYg&cvosrc=affiliate.linkshare.25ZRSXYPVYg&subid1=25ZRSXYPVYg-Vc68ECHXHvym0LSRcMpT7g&sharedid=42352&affuid=swa.ww3866974

https://www.davidjones.com/brand/country-road/23299011/SILK-TIERED-DRESS.html

https://www.evans.co.uk/plus-size-maxi-tropical-escape-207260navy?catfilter=eyJpZCI6IjEwOTM5In0%3D

I have exactly the same problem as you which I have had after giving birth to twins. Unfort I still shop in maternity!
There is only three solutions:

• wear a cardigan or jacket to ensure your belly is not obvious
• choose a top or dress with a collar of some sort which helps provide shape and form up top to ensure the material below skims your belly.
• prob the best top shape which flatters a small bust and large belly is I think it’s called a bubble top - it has elastic at the base/bottom of the top but because this falls below your belly it makes the top look floaty and hides a lot of things.

It’s not the actual wedding, it’s a party months later. If it were me and I was so uncomfortable I’d say I was ill the morning of (migraine, upset stomach etc not Covid or dh couldn’t go) and wave dh off.

Here's an idea...

It's very easy to get down about our shape / lack of clothes for it etc. The more we think about it, the more down in the dumps and negative we can get.

So, this is your opportunity to turn this around! Lots of shops have personal shoppers now, find a free on in your area. Let them suggest styles that you would never think about then get your glam on! Keep your head held high, screw your toxic in-laws and have the best day out with your DH!

I've been in your head space, totally understand how you feel but come on, get off MN and take some of this fabulous advice you've been given by everyone

Good luck x

MN seems to have forgotten their mantra "A wedding is an invitation, not a summons" and are now insisting the OP go.

Why post? If you've already decided and aren't open to any sensible suggestions?

@Spidey66

MN seems to have forgotten their mantra "A wedding is an invitation, not a summons" and are now insisting the OP go.

My point was that OP should have declined the invitation to begin with. To accept the invitation then just refuse to go last minute is the poor behaviour here.

I've got a great maxi dress that has ruched top that hugs any sign of boobs and floats over the lumps and bumps. Another vote for trying in S&B.

If you want to go get a padded bra and a maxi dress.

If you don't want to go then just don't.

Why’s your tummy so bloated op? Bloated is very different from fat. Are you getting medical support for that?

@Spidey66

MN seems to have forgotten their mantra "A wedding is an invitation, not a summons" and are now insisting the OP go.

or more accurately, people are answering the question the OP ASKED by telling her it's a shame to miss out on life because you are unhappy with your body.

And it's extremely rude to change your mind at the last minute

The current fashion IS over-sized maxi dress, that yes, can possibly look a bit of a sack, but that's what everyone is wearing.

Of all the year you can hide unwanted flab it's the one!

The problem is that if OP isn’t normally someone who “follows fashion” she might look (and feel) a bit weird suddenly going all “on trend”. And if those at the wedding don’t follow fashion either they might just wonder why on earth she is wearing a big old baggy sack.

She can also wear a wrapped dress, go on yours clothings, wear whatever she wants.

The point was that this year is so much more comfortable than the year of the bodycons and Mouret dresses.

You have so much more choices away from gathering at the waist or under the boobs and bringing attention to your stomach, this year shapes are really flattering.

Wearing different type clothes when you have a different body shape than you are used to works a lot better than trying to stick with what you used to wear. The difference is much less obvious.

H&M super floaty gorgeous on!

www2.hm.com/en_gb/productpage.1007899001.html