My 3 children are not sporty. They are not the type of kids to be outside kicking balls around or riding bikes. Left to their own devices, they would be couch potatoes.
Organised sport is the best thing that has happened to them.
DS1- like so many kids described here would get anxious and nervous before games. He is not a strong player on his team. He has done football for 4 years. Why am I doing this to him then? Why haven’t I let him quit when he doesn’t really love it? Well, he has learnt that doing difficult things he doesn’t like doesn’t necessarily result in something bad happening. He will never love football, but it is at the point where he has accepted it is a chore he does and he gets on with it. He has overcome the fear in the pit of his stomach and that is worth its weight in gold. The best life skill I could have given him. At school on Monday, he has stuff to talk about. His natural skills are public speaking and comedy theatre. He regales his classmates with detailed stories of the games and they great moves his teammates made. His teammates in his class love him for it. They get to boast without having to say anything! During his sister’s games, he gathers up all the toddlers and preschoolers and runs an unofficial football clinic at the sidelines. He loves it. He will never love football. He will always get nervous before games, although he can control that now. I accept I will only get one more season out of him. But it has just been the best thing for his confidence, fitness and character.
DD1- an uncoordinated ball of joy who is on her 3rd year of football. To our surprise, she has become a reasonably competent player. Last year she got her first goal. If only I could have got a photo of her face and framed it. She is on an all boy team and will soon be out skilled. But of all my kids, she is the one who might continue on into her teens. I will try and move her to an all girls team next season. I think she will blossom. She loves the game and the social aspects.
DD2- hopeless player. Skips around the field like a gazelle and has the best time. Fresh air, exercise and fun. Her teammate, who belongs to a family that arrived on a refugee intake program from Bhutan, kicked his first goal! The joy on the field and the sidelines was amazing.
Obviously a bad coach or a ridiculously competitive club can result in different experiences. In Australia, scores aren’t officially kept till Under 12s so it doesn’t seem to be a big pressure sport. Of course the kids keep score but it stops a lot of the rot from parents.
It’s not just the games though. It’s the party invitations, making friends from other schools that you would never meet otherwise. It’s the end of season BBQs in the park with the creek that my kids love and talk about all year. It’s being part of something. Saturday mornings are taken up with football. It sucks as a parent. But when my kids get home Saturday afternoon, I can let me jump on the iPads without guilt. They have played a game and spent their sibling’s games running around practicing. They train for an hour Thursday afternoons and there is another afternoon of exercise that I can tick off.
Lots of posters will vehemently disagree with me. I just wanted to make the point that organised sport can have amazing benefits for the non-sporty, anxious kids too.