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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be pissed off at mothers who take their kids to toddlers full of the cold!!!!!

222 replies

elliemac · 26/11/2007 15:19

Have just been to toddlers where one of the mothers was moaning that her DS had been up all night coughing. He was stood there with green snot all down his face poor little mite. He should have been indoors. Now its going to be passed round all the kids

OP posts:
notnowbernard · 26/11/2007 16:18

A slight temerature is a good thing... the body's response to fighting off infection.

A high temperature obviously makes one feel more poorly (and it sends dd1 a bit weird, too) so worth staying indoors for.

Lots of snot etc generally means the contagious phase has passed anyway.

I'm trying to remember the last time dd2 didn't have a snotty nose. I really can't...

nametaken · 26/11/2007 16:21

I've learnt something new today then because I always thought you shivered with temp but according to you lot on here you don't always so thanks for putting me straight.

Oh well, you're never too old to learn

belgo · 26/11/2007 16:21

that's true VVVQV - my dh's baby neice became very ill at age one week and was hospitalised for a week because her grandmother visited her with a heavy cold.

Miaou · 26/11/2007 16:24

Last year a woman took her dd along to a Christmas party, a fortnight before Christmas, fairly sure that she had just got the chicken pox (she had). As a result, out of 12 children at that party, 10 of them developed chicken pox over christmas. Now THAT is out of order imo. I was livid!

iloverosycheeks · 26/11/2007 16:24

I am just amazed that 'full of the cold' is not a nationwide expression!

louii · 26/11/2007 16:25

It is usually handy to take childs temp every now and again so you know what is a normal temp for them.
My Ds has a slightly higher temp than a lot of kids normally so its useful to know when hes not well.

needmorecoffee · 26/11/2007 16:57

A cold and runny nose is very different from 'hacking cough' DD has her fair share of runny noses. Its normal from age 2-4 I think, to have two permamnet slugs of snot.
Hacking cough could be something more infectious or serious like whooping cough> i would be cross if someone with a hacking cough was at toddlers or school. And I would hope any parent could tell the difference between 'hacking' cough and a normal got a cold cough/end of cold type thing.

TheMadHouse · 26/11/2007 17:01

Oh is was prob me. I take mine out with cols. DS1 often has a cough, but this is due to a consition not an illness - so I say it is fine to take them. I would not taking them with a temp or if they were being sick.

TBH I thought DS2 was better this morning, but he is not

bubblagirl · 26/11/2007 17:01

a cough is normally the bodies way of fighting off colds and always the last thing to go as it is clearing crap from body not contagious you would know if the cough was anything more serious as the signs would show in child

needmorecoffee · 26/11/2007 17:05

dd can't actually cough. Must ask the doc how she will clear her lungs when the inevitable does happen. So far, just colds. Couple of bouts of pneumonia but that was from food aspiration.

evenhope · 26/11/2007 17:31

My DD (8 months) has had a cold for 3 weeks. I have continued to take her to Toddlers because that's where she picked it up in the first place

Having said that, when DS1 was 15 months old I took him with me to my hairdressing appointment. An older child with a hacking cough kept going over to his pushchair. Within a few days he was seriously ill and the GP was talking about admitting him to hospital over Xmas.

Of course I can't prove it was that child, but he hadn't been anywhere else to pick up an infection.

So yes I can see both sides of this.

SenoraPostrophe · 26/11/2007 17:36

needmorecoffee - ds1 gets a hacking cough every time he gets a cold because he is asthmatic. it is highly unlikely to be whooping cough, what with vaccinations and everything.

morocco · 26/11/2007 17:45

op - yabu but i've been there, esp with ds1, it's only a cold tho
needmorecoffee I sympathise, it is v hard when your child is immunosuppressed, i've given many a dirty look to some poor snotty child in my time, but apart from my pet hates of c pox/other similar viruses there's not much you can do about other people's snotty kids. when ds1 was pretty immunosuppressed we used to go to the smallest toddler group in the world and i've even go in first to check out the state of the kids in there and take him home if nec. it was stressful. but he still could have picked up anything off a door handle. i would have been really peed off if anyone had come to my house with their kids like that but all my friends were great about it. sorry, that's just a ramble really . . .

needmorecoffee · 26/11/2007 18:23

Senora, vaccinations don't mean your child wont get whooping cough. My eldest caught it when she was one despite being vaccinated. She was horribly ill. ds1 didn't catch it from her werirdly enough despite being a little baby and unvaccinated. But then he probably had immunity from me through my milk (I had it as a child too)

yurt1 · 26/11/2007 18:34

One of the biggest reservoirs of whooping cough infection is adults- it's less obvious in adults as they don't whoop- they just have a cough that goes on and on. Vaccinations wear off and anyway the whooping cough virus has mutated and there is a new strain that isn't protected against by vaccination. DS2 had it- from October until March- he was diagnosed as asthmatic (incorrectly) - so we really had no way of knowing that he had it. Incidentally whooping cough is supposedly not protected against via passive antibodies (ds2 was exposed at a few weeks old as well- although didn't get it- he got it when he was older).

I'm careful with tummy bugs, and obvious illness (so high temp- not via thermometer - from hand - my children run stonking high temps so very obvious) but coughs and colds are tricky. I wouldn't take a child with a cold to see a newborn or a child (or adult) with health problems but I don't think you can keep your children at home for every cold or cough.

becaroo · 26/11/2007 18:35

My ds has asthma and I dread the winter months as he is almost constantly ill from september to april.

He has been really ill this past week with a throat virus/cold thing which has really exacerbated his asthma.

Just heard from another mum at nursery whose child has been ill since friday - she took her child to the docs this afternoon and he has a chest infection and is now on antibiotics.

She is sending him to nursery tomorrow, where no doubt my ds will pick it up and be very ill indeed.

Of course children need to build up their immunity by being exposed to the viral pool, but IMO knowingly sending a child who has a bacterial infection is selfish and dangerous.

Not all children are strong and healthy.

becaroo · 26/11/2007 18:37

Also, re: whooping cough, I nearly died of it when I was 18 months old, despite being vaccinated and then got adult whooping cough earlier this year.

Its an awful illness.

yurt1 · 26/11/2007 18:39

I don't think chest infections (bacterial) are transmissible though are they? Same way as ear infections aren't. Could be wrong but I thought that was the case.

EricL · 26/11/2007 18:41

You can't keep them at home if it is just a cold.

What kind of lesson does that teach them for later in life?

They will be the ones who skive off all the time and don't go into work cos 'they don't feel great'.

Bah humbug.

becaroo · 26/11/2007 18:47

My ds seems to catch anything...anywhere!!!!

Having said that, up to last week, he was having a much better autumn/winter than last year.

I keep my ds at home if he has a high temp or vomiting and diahorrea (sp?)

It is hard sometimes, as he really loves nursery, but a child who hasnt slept in 4 nights and is vomiting phelgm just is not well enough IMO.

manchita · 26/11/2007 18:55

YABU. It is impossible to keep your children at home every time they catch a cold! Okay, with a stomach bug or something like that it would be irresponsible to take them, but it is actually worse for your childs immune system in the long run if you try to shield them from every cough/cold.
And i would never see any friends if we waited until all our children were well!

Niecie · 26/11/2007 19:06

DS2 had a cold today but still went to nursery. I phoned them up to see if it was OK (he also has an infected finger too which I wasn't sure they would be happy about) and they said bring him in - said they would be very happy to have him, in fact.

If he had been off his food, had a temperature or, like yesterday before his nose was running, he had been unable to go more than 30 seconds without coughing I would have kept him home. But he was fine in himself and eating and sleeping enough so he went. This is his second cold in 3 weeks so we would have housebound if we hadn't just carried on. I also wouldn't let him near new borns as it is not nice to have a baby with a cold.

On the other hand, with a stomach bug I am probably more cautious than most as you can be contagious up to 48 hours after the symptons have stopped so he would have stayed home longer with that.

CrushWithEyeliner · 26/11/2007 19:37

Taking a LO out when ill with a cold makes it turn into something worse imo, going out with a temp how ill must the baby feel as well as passing it to others - what's the big deal with just keeping them cosy for a few days?

notnowbernard · 26/11/2007 19:41

'Easy' and 'cosy' staying at home with one poorly child...

Quite different if you have others who are bouncing off the walls.

Again, a child/baby who is poorly is not the same as a child/baby with a cough/cold.

halia · 26/11/2007 19:45

cold weather DOESN'T cause a cold or make it worse, and its better for a kid with a cold (but otherwise okay) to get out into fresh air and away from central heating and germs.

The big deal with keeping them cosy is that unless violently ill DS HATES sitting still, being indoors, being 'cosy, staying away from nursery.

So we'd have a lovley 'easy' day of me running ragged and DS screaming to go out!

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