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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Corona dillema

266 replies

Coronanamechangie · 21/07/2021 11:20

Hi all. Name changed as don't want real life hatred.

We've been isolating for 8 days as DH tested positive. We count the 10 days from when he first showed symptoms. Were sending DC1 and DC2 back to school tomorrow.

However just lateral flowed them and DC2 is stongingly positive. We're tempted to send DC1 to school as it's their last couple of days of year 6.

Is this horribly irresponsible? Should we sit out another 10 days as a family? Sposed to be going to Devon on Sunday.

If we should send DC1 to school what should we tell them?

IBU - should do more isolation NBU should carefully proceed with life.

OP posts:
onceivepostedidontcomeback · 21/07/2021 13:18

@cantkeepawayforever

STOP BERATING THE OP.

Her DC1 can go into school at the end of 10 days from the start of her DH's symptoms - the index case - as long as DC! themselves does not have sumptoms.

DC2, as an lft positive, needs a PCR and will need to isolate for 10 days from the day of the +ve lft, which will scupper the holiday.

But DC1 is COMPLETELY within their rights to go back into school after completing their own isolation. OP may CHOOSE to do more - keep them off for longer - but THERE IS NO RULE THAT REQUIRES THIS.

NO WE WON'T.

Posted today, on day 8 of isolation means day 10 isn't until Friday so no they can't go back tomorrow! THERE IS A RULE THAT REQUIRES THIS.

StatisticallyChallenged · 21/07/2021 13:21

@Willyoujustbequiet

Cantkeepaway

Have you read the full thread?

Its entirely selfish and not the rules - she was going to send them at day 8 not 10 Hmm

They're 10 days from husbands symptoms. Giving benefit of the doubt and assuming they didn't realise symptoms might be covid for a couple of days, then got test. The 10 day count still starts from when he had symptoms.
Lockheart · 21/07/2021 13:23

There is no dilemma. Here is what you must do.

  • All of you must complete the original 10 day isolation.
  • You must arrange a PCR test for the DC whose LFT came back positive.
  • If that PCR is negative, and assuming you have no more positive LFTs, then you're all free to stop isolating once the original 10-day period is up. You can go on holiday / send DCs to school.
  • If that PCR is positive, then the DC in question must isolate for 10 days, although there is no longer a requirement for the rest of you to isolate. This will mean that one DC can go to school, but you won't be able to go on holiday.
Dashel · 21/07/2021 13:23

Why would anyone even want to risk passing covid on for one day of school. It’s batshit and selfish.

Surely it’s better to be cautious considering potential consequences vs reward of going to school? Plus if your kid goes to school as says my sibling is ill with Covid but look I’m here, that’s not going to sit well with anyone and you will seriously piss people off.

Loki01 · 21/07/2021 13:25

Are you serious?

How selfish are some people. My husband is immunocompromised, I am heavily pregnant. I hope the parents in my son's school are a bit better than this.

NeverForgetYourDreams · 21/07/2021 13:27

The one who didn't test positive can go in legally.

But I wouldn't

ohthatbloodycat · 21/07/2021 13:27

Is giving your child a good end-of-school experience really worth not being able to live with yourself if something happened?

Loki01 · 21/07/2021 13:27

@Coronanamechangie

Ok. Cancelled Devon. Booked PCR for both kids. If DC1 is negative will send to last day of school. I think of PCR is negative after 10 days off isolation this is not irresponsible.

It's not pedantic arguing. I am trying to follow the rules and do what's best for all.

No, you don't. You are trying to find a way to get out of the isolation.
Rupertpenrysmistress · 21/07/2021 13:29

Please don't send him in, there is chance he is also positive or will be if both your DH and DC are. My DS is missing the last days of school as he is a contact, negative LFT but still we follow what we are told. As an aside I am an NHS nurse and while numbers are not what they were in the first wave we have ITU patients who are much younger and often only had one vaccine. Please think of the teachers and other staff who might have their holiday cancelled or become unwell.

It is tough, but we need to try to so the best for everyone.

Batsy · 21/07/2021 13:30

@Coronanamechangie

Hi all. Name changed as don't want real life hatred.

We've been isolating for 8 days as DH tested positive. We count the 10 days from when he first showed symptoms. Were sending DC1 and DC2 back to school tomorrow.

However just lateral flowed them and DC2 is stongingly positive. We're tempted to send DC1 to school as it's their last couple of days of year 6.

Is this horribly irresponsible? Should we sit out another 10 days as a family? Sposed to be going to Devon on Sunday.

If we should send DC1 to school what should we tell them?

IBU - should do more isolation NBU should carefully proceed with life.

DC2 needs a PCR. IF he's getting a PCR test, the whole house needs to isolate until he gets the results. TBH, i would PCR test both of them (And yourself) if he comes back positive, he needs to do the 10 days. You would all be marked as close contacts and need to isolate with him.

Please get the PCR tests, don't send either to school. Once you have PCR results, you can see if holiday can still happen.. if anything is positive, it can't.

Don't be a spreader.

cantkeepawayforever · 21/07/2021 13:32

NO WE WON'T.

Posted today, on day 8 of isolation means day 10 isn't until Friday so no they can't go back tomorrow! THERE IS A RULE THAT REQUIRES THIS.

No, it is 10 days from the start of the index case's symptoms - in this case, DH's (otherwise every 'pinged' or 'Test and traced' contact would be 10 days isolation - which it isn't).

This can quite easily be 8 days for the rest of the family.

cantkeepawayforever · 21/07/2021 13:33

You would all be marked as close contacts and need to isolate with him.

No - that is wrong. The current law is that IF the new case is in the same household, and occurs within the original isolation, no additional isolation is triggered.

MakkaPakkas · 21/07/2021 13:33

You could ruin so many other people's holidays by sending your kid into school if they are still developing covid. So that is really unreasonable.
Going to Devon self catering... Maybe, maybe ok if you're not mixing

cantkeepawayforever · 21/07/2021 13:35

No, you don't. You are trying to find a way to get out of the isolation.

No, she is following the rules. You can argue whether the rules are sensible, but OP is followng the rules - and some, to be fair, as she doesn't say that DC2 has symptoms, so by testing them at all she is going above and beyond.

i think the rules are silly and defy common sense BUT e.g. the OP and their DH's employers will be expecting them back after the 10 days' isolation, and has every right to expect them to return.

Fcuk38 · 21/07/2021 13:36

Being the last few days of year 6 isn’t a reason to send her in. Goodness I would have just called it a week ago that there would be no more school. Stay home and hopefully you get to holiday as with all the other families.

MGMidget · 21/07/2021 13:36

Dont you have to isolate too, not just your DS? I am pretty sure that you are all close contacts of a positive case now. Its not just a case of a bubble isolating from school where your other DS may not have got close enough to catch it. Now his sibling has it he could catch it from him, as could any of you in the house. That will apply now foe another 10 days. A PCR trst will comfirm it or if negative you can all come out of isolation.

If you send your DS back to school you are asking them to be complicit in what you are doing. Will they keep their mouth shut or let it slip? Even if they keep their mouth shut is it a lesson you want to teach them?

Smallkeys · 21/07/2021 13:37

The PCR result will probably come back positive if the lateral flow showed positive . So yes you should be responsible and not send to school. Hmm

emilylily · 21/07/2021 13:39

@Littlepool

Thanks to someone doing exactly as you are considering, my toddler and my 8 month pregnant self are currently floored with covid. How Incredibly selfish! I'm borderline for requiring hospital care depending on how the next few hours go and DC is so poorly, they can't even keep water down! It's made even worse by finding out the household we and 3 other families caught it from had confirmed positive cases and still sent dc to pre school!

But of course only you and your family matter so do whatever suits you best Hmm

I hope you start feeling better really soon Littlepool. I'm sorry this has happened to you!
EveryoneButSam · 21/07/2021 13:41

My, there's a lot of high-handed vitriol on here from people who are wrong about isolation rules. Whether you agree with them or not, it is 10 days' isolation from onset of symptoms in index case, and no requirement for further isolation for negative contacts even if an extra person develops symptoms or tests positive. As has been clearly explained by pp, and not read or disregarded by many subsequent pps.

I think this thread amply demonstrates not so much that everyone but you is a selfish bastard, but more that a lot of people don't know what the rules are and are making up ones they like the sound of. That goes just as much for over-interpretation as under.

cantkeepawayforever · 21/07/2021 13:41

@MGMidget

Dont you have to isolate too, not just your DS? I am pretty sure that you are all close contacts of a positive case now. Its not just a case of a bubble isolating from school where your other DS may not have got close enough to catch it. Now his sibling has it he could catch it from him, as could any of you in the house. That will apply now foe another 10 days. A PCR trst will comfirm it or if negative you can all come out of isolation.

If you send your DS back to school you are asking them to be complicit in what you are doing. Will they keep their mouth shut or let it slip? Even if they keep their mouth shut is it a lesson you want to teach them?

The law is this:

Case 1: OPs' DH. has symptoms, takes test on Day 2 of those symptoms.

This triggers isolation until exactly the same end date for the whole family.

Possible case 2: OP's DS2 - positive lft, should take PCR.

If case 2 is positive, everyone EXCEPT Case 2 is still freed on the original date BUT Case 2 has to isolate for 10 days from their positive lft.

Freed DOES include free to go to school, and parents to go to work.

StatisticallyChallenged · 21/07/2021 13:44

@MGMidget

Dont you have to isolate too, not just your DS? I am pretty sure that you are all close contacts of a positive case now. Its not just a case of a bubble isolating from school where your other DS may not have got close enough to catch it. Now his sibling has it he could catch it from him, as could any of you in the house. That will apply now foe another 10 days. A PCR trst will comfirm it or if negative you can all come out of isolation.

If you send your DS back to school you are asking them to be complicit in what you are doing. Will they keep their mouth shut or let it slip? Even if they keep their mouth shut is it a lesson you want to teach them?

This isn't the case - several of us have posted links/charts to explain why. The isolation for the whole house doesn't restart
JaninaDuszejko · 21/07/2021 13:47

DD tested positive by LFT a couple of weeks ago, we all had a PCR the same day and DH was positive as well so all our isolations started. DS and I continued to do regular LFT and on day 7 DS got a positive confirmed by PCR. When DH spoke to T&T about how many days we had to isolate they were quite clear than only DS needed to isolate. Seems mad but that's the rules. In another month then anyone double vaccinated won't have to isolate, even though some double vaccinated people do get infected (DH was double vaccinated).

goldfinchfan · 21/07/2021 13:48

Lucky Devon. Another covid carrying family on their way!

BungleandGeorge · 21/07/2021 13:53

@EveryoneButSam

My, there's a lot of high-handed vitriol on here from people who are wrong about isolation rules. Whether you agree with them or not, it is 10 days' isolation from onset of symptoms in index case, and no requirement for further isolation for negative contacts even if an extra person develops symptoms or tests positive. As has been clearly explained by pp, and not read or disregarded by many subsequent pps.

I think this thread amply demonstrates not so much that everyone but you is a selfish bastard, but more that a lot of people don't know what the rules are and are making up ones they like the sound of. That goes just as much for over-interpretation as under.

Unfortunately that includes you as I just looked it up to make sure and the isolation period is 10 days from the day after symptoms start or the positive PCR if no symptoms.
HarebrightCedarmoon · 21/07/2021 13:53

Surely you'd get free PCR tests for everyone before you go anywhere.