To not pick up the peas?

[inpixiehollow]

We were invited out yesterday for sunday lunch with my MIL and her 94 year old mother. We went to a local pub, me and my partner, MIL, partners grandma and our 11 month old daughter.
I hadn't been to the pub before but wasn't impressed with it, the food wasn't great and the pub needed a good clean everywhere but we made the best of it wanting to be polite. We all had a carvery and I shared some of mine onto my daughters plate including peas. When we were done there was some mess left under the highchair (honestly not much at all, some very small bits of meat and peas) MIL's mum remarked that our daughter had made such a mess. I replied that it would only take a few minutes for them to sweep/hoover it up but she seemed horrified I wasn't going to get on my hands and knees on a pretty dirty carpet, in 29 degree heat and diligently pick up each scrap of food. I should add that the pub was almost empty too so no reason why the staff wouldn't have time to quickly tidy up. Having worked in hospitality I wouldn't have expected parents to bother about this small amount of food on the floor? I wiped down the highchair and the table where she had left gravy/mashed potato but left the, at the most 10 peas on the floor.. WIBU?

It is common courtesy to clean up some mess that has been dropped on the floor,by a baby or small child, and quick to do,instead of counting peas !

Well I’ve learnt today that I must be lazy, skanky and entitled too and all my friends with babies and toddlers for that matter!
When I take 19 month old DD for lunch and she’s in a high chair food inevitably gets on the floor! Big pieces I’ll scoop up quickly and put them aside so she can’t touch them again but little bits that get flung off etc (especially something like peas!) I will leave.
I always make the effort to say “sorry about the mess!” when leaving though.

I don’t often come equipped to restaurants with my own mops, hoovers, dustpans and brushes so how else would I clean up after myself without getting on my hands and knees? Yeah…I’m not doing that. The staff won’t be on their hands and knees lol. They’ll have the tools to be able to clean it. Don’t like it? Get another job.

YABU. You seem to think the state of the pub warrants your actions.

However, IMO that is akin to throwing some rubbish out of your car on to the road as "there is rubbish there anyway".

When my DC were little I always had a good supply of wipes which I would use to clean high chairs and the inevitable mess on the floor.

Its embarrassing seeing the mess a lot of parents leave created by their kids..

Sorry OP but that’s really rude.

We had this the other day, my DC had left a mess under his chair and we asked for a dustpan and brush. They wouldn’t actually let us clear it up but at least we acknowledged it and didn’t assume someone would just clean our mess for us! That’s embarrassing and entitled!

I clean in a restaurant for pin money, early morning. The mess some people leave behind is grim. The issue is that too many people have no respect for cleaners or waiting staff.

I always used to pick up after the kids in restaurants/pubs when they were still at the highchair stage. DS1 was always a surprisingly neat eater anyway, DS2 not so much.

It takes a minute at most to pick up a few scraps from the floor. Chances are the pub wasn't as clean as you'd have liked, precisely because so many people have your attitude and leave food all over the floor, where it gets trodden on and ground into the carpet, which then needs a deeper clean than most cleaners are able to do in a short timeframe.

Seriously, it's just common courtesy.

YABU, mess left after children is the worst. Working in hospitality, especially in summer, is hot, sweaty and exhausting. I worked in cafés and tea rooms from the age of 13 until I graduated and you would be the definition nightmare customer. I’m embarrassed for you that this is even a question you’d ask.

Just think it’s interesting that the child’s dad was there yet his grandma turns to the child’s mother and tells her to clean up.
Reminds me of when my BIL was putting my nephew to bed for the first time in a blue moon and his 75-yo father turned to my sister and said ‘you’re very lucky that he helps you so much with the baby, you know’.

YABU , staff are paid to clear tables not the mess left by babies / children .

Yabu. I would always clean up after my kids.

@mamaatthegym

Well I’ve learnt today that I must be lazy, skanky and entitled too and all my friends with babies and toddlers for that matter! When I take 19 month old DD for lunch and she’s in a high chair food inevitably gets on the floor! Big pieces I’ll scoop up quickly and put them aside so she can’t touch them again but little bits that get flung off etc (especially something like peas!) I will leave. I always make the effort to say “sorry about the mess!” when leaving though.

I don’t often come equipped to restaurants with my own mops, hoovers, dustpans and brushes so how else would I clean up after myself without getting on my hands and knees? Yeah…I’m not doing that. The staff won’t be on their hands and knees lol. They’ll have the tools to be able to clean it. Don’t like it? Get another job.

I always make the effort to say “sorry about the mess!” when leaving though.

That's big of you 🙄

I don’t often come equipped to restaurants with my own mops, hoovers, dustpans and brushes so how else would I clean up after myself without getting on my hands and knees?

Again the silly, childish deflections don't excuse your skanky ignorance in not bending down to pick up your child's mess.

And nor will it set a good example to your DC.

So it's ok for them to get down on their hands and knees in the heat but not you?

Absolutely this!
I’m not sure why the heat is even relevant, would you do it if it was a cooler day?

@mamaatthegym

Well I’ve learnt today that I must be lazy, skanky and entitled too and all my friends with babies and toddlers for that matter! When I take 19 month old DD for lunch and she’s in a high chair food inevitably gets on the floor! Big pieces I’ll scoop up quickly and put them aside so she can’t touch them again but little bits that get flung off etc (especially something like peas!) I will leave. I always make the effort to say “sorry about the mess!” when leaving though.

I don’t often come equipped to restaurants with my own mops, hoovers, dustpans and brushes so how else would I clean up after myself without getting on my hands and knees? Yeah…I’m not doing that. The staff won’t be on their hands and knees lol. They’ll have the tools to be able to clean it. Don’t like it? Get another job.

Wow I wish I could be part of your scummy mummy gang.

Get another job
Crack on to yourself.

YANBU. I've worked in MANY hospitality venues and it's totally normal for there to be food on the floor under the high chair after the customers have left. I never thought badly of the parents and just saw the clean up as part of my job. Although of course an apology and a tip would be appreciated. I'd have much rather had a mess and a tip than that they cleaned up and didn't leave one!

YABU op. But you reminded me of the Edwina Currie and John Major sketch about the peas and gave me a laugh.

Do you leave the food on the floor at home for your domestic staff to clean up? I do hope not.

I cleaned up after our DD one time.
SIL was determined to embarrass me and said rather loudly she could tell I’d worked in a pub because it’s only ex bar staff who really worry about tidying up after themselves.
When the bill arrived they’d taken my meal,my DDs meal and our drinks off the bill.
The manager came to take the payment and asked about where I’d worked . He gave me a voucher for a free meal the next time I came.
Surprised the chip on you shoulder didn’t end up under the table too.

Ew, clean up after your child! I always get under the table and pick up food the baby has dropped and run a baby wipe over the highchair. It's not hard.

How many peas would there needed to have been for you to pick them up? 12? And would you just pick up 2 and leave ten?

YABU

People always justify the mess they leave “oh it’s just 10 peas, the staff have time to clean up, that’s their job”

It’s shitty. Clean up after your own child.

No wonder your mother in law was mortified, why should somebody else get on their hands and knees to clean up after your child.

When I waitresses as a student it was always a specific type of scruffy family without manners that left a mess on the floor. It’s grim.

@AbstractHeart

YANBU. I've worked in MANY hospitality venues and it's totally normal for there to be food on the floor under the high chair after the customers have left. I never thought badly of the parents and just saw the clean up as part of my job. Although of course an apology and a tip would be appreciated. I'd have much rather had a mess and a tip than that they cleaned up and didn't leave one!

I'd have much rather had a mess and a tip than that they cleaned up and didn't leave one!

But that's not what this is about.

Street cleaners don't get tips, that doesn't mean people should drop litter or not pick up the litter dropped by their DC.

Acknowledge the mess, and give the staff another £2 or 3.
You all had a meal and drinks, £60 or more what's another few quid.
Not your fault about the state of venue; maybe don't go back.
We all need to face paying full price for goods and especially services.

I always pick up the food from the floor that DD drops/throws once we’re done. I would be embarrassed to leave a mess under her chair. I don’t think that’s fair on the staff at all.

Clearing tables is one thing but to pick up a child half eaten, cold, soggy foot from beneath their chair is pretty poor to be ok with that. Sure the little bit and pieces that you can’t really pick up fair enough. But I wouldn’t be leaving peas and things under there.

I always picked up after mine.

The staff are not to blame if the place isn't clean enough for you. That's management. Staff can't deep clean if they are not given time, and if the management don't hire cleaners for end of day then that's on them. You cannot blame serving staff for that.

Also, their job is to serve and then turn the tables over for the next guests. Not spend 10 minutes cleaning a high char and floor. It's your kid. You pick up after them.

@user0985238

One of my friends did this, I was embarrassed to be with them and definitely think less of them now.

Lazy and entitled.

This is the same for me.

Friend and 2dc (1 in a high chair) left food all on the floor. When I asked her she'd leave food they'd dropped on the floor like that at home she got quite indignant and told me that what the waitresses and cleaning staff were for and she wasn't picking it up.

I ended up picking it all up as felt so embarrassed. It took literally a minute.

I've never been out to eat with her or her dc since and when she's asked I've told her this is why.

Yea I'd have picked them up in a wet wipe or tissue. I'd have been worried they'd have veen trodden into the carpet no matter how dirty the carpet was.